OK ladies. I am going to apologize right now for sounding like a complete idiot but I have to vent. Today was my ds6 first ever soccer practice. He said he was Ok with going but when they got started with practice, he had a total meltdown. When I finally got him calmed down enough to find out what was wrong, he said that he didn't want to play soccer with other kids. He just wanted it to be him and his coach. So, I am feeling like homeschooling is maybe not a good idea for him. I feel like I am failing him because he is so used to one and one and that is the only way it has been. He does church and Awana and that is about it right now. Help. Where am I going wrong! Rhonda
Maybe you can start him off with a milder form of group activity? My youngest is 12 the youngest of 4. She LOVES basketball and is very good at it BUT she does not want to play it as an organized sport. She just wants to play it for the fun of it. I wouldn't write off hsing over something so simple. Do you have access to other hsers? I know where we are there are different groups that do things even as simple as park days.
My son was the same way - but it turned out it was because it was competitive vs just for fun and being a perfectionist, if he didn't get it right he refused to play. Of course this is looking back at it now. Like Jennifer said I would look to see if there is anything non-competitive in your area just for him to PLAY and have fun and getting used to a teacher with more than 1 kid. Mine did swimming lessons at the local rec center over the winter when they were 4-6 and it was great for them. Other 'general' classes might work well too! I just know that soccer can be VERY competitive and a lot of kids get pushed aside if they aren't super stars (at least in our area it is like that) Good Luck!
Personally, I do not think homeschooling has anything to do with it, but then I do not know your son. :angel: My nephew is in ps and is the same way. Emma does not like to participate in any plays at church or when she was part of a group. Yet, she does beautifully in ballet and will dance in front of hundreds of people and in front of judges. I think a lot has to do with what your child enjoys. Is it the sport or the fun? I think if he was in ps, he might be the same. The type of education isn't the problem, if it a socialization issue. If he isn't around people or groups enough, then perhaps you can find other things for him to get involved. I know many boys who are in the ps and love to play one on one but will not play as a team. It just isn't who they are and the beauty of homeschooling is helping our children be who they are. Patty
may not be due to homeschooling my kids prefer individual sports. Sometimes all those kids running around can be confusing for someone who does not have great gross motor planning skills. They may feel quite frustrated as they are not sure where to move, if that natural ability to do is not there. I'm sure there are plenty of opportunities for your son to get use to groups. I'd start smaller and with something less intense than soccer. Michelle
Rhonda, I went back and read that your dear son is 6 years old. He is still a youngster. My nephew, the older brother of the boy I mentioned above, was not into sports when he was young. He, too, would cry. Now he is a 16 year old who weighs 225 pounds, all muscle, and is one of the football teams main players. He loves it too. Things will change with time. Like I said, he is still young. Patty
Oh please listen to these ladies as they have given you sound advice! It probably doesn't have a thing to do with hs'ing so don't write it off so quickly. He is still very young.
Rhonda, when my Jeannie first did soccer at the Y,she was a mess. She didn't understand the positions, wasn't used to the game at all, and basically she just followed the herd. Could you get some soccer videos for him to watch, if he's not familiar with it? Maybe a hs gym class would be better, because those kids might not be used to an organized game like that, either. How does the coach seem? Could you talk to him privately about this? Maybe ask how you can help your boy fit in better so he can enjoy himself?
I didn't read the posts but I'll offer my 2cents as someone whose dh coaches for a living and as someone who has had to run classes where the parents 'thought it would be good for their kids to go" Soccer is not fun when you're 6. If you're especially athletic and aggressive it is great bc you'll get lots of ball handling time but if you're not then you stand around trying to figure out how to get in there. Kids at this age don't get the concept of passing or working as a team. they just think 'kick-ball-hard-that-way-good" and run around. Of course he wants to play with his coach! When my dh coaches soccer for that age, they spend most of hte time learning ball handling skills. And kids aren't dumb--whether he's played soccer before or not he probably realizes on some level that this is not his ideal situation. This, IMO has nothing to do with hsing but rather a poor choice of activities for him. My suggestion is to let him decide what he might like to do rather than sticking him in something you'd think would be good for him. You're likely to experience a lot more success that way.
My daughter is six and she just LOVES being with the children... BUT when our homeschool group did relay races and kickball--well, I realized that she is just a natural cheerleader! She is a natural at encouraging the others. She couldn't care less about the game or what she was supposed to do in it or even who won at the time. She just wanted to have fun jumping around and running and laughing with the other children. I think this will change when she is older. When I was six, I mostl played with my younger brother and sister. Even on the school playground, we made up our own games. It may be old fashioned, as it was 40 years ago, but no one did organized sports at that age.
These ladies all gave you wonderful advice and I agree with all of them.. they are right it has nothing to do with hsing. I think he is to young and needs something easier for him to start with. Oh, do you have a hs group try, that first. Good luck
Thanks you all so much for the advice. I apologize for venting but it was the moment. I think you are right about it just not being his thing. The coach seemed real nice and was trying to help him along. But, he just stood there and cried. Sneaky Mama, thanks for the perspective of a coaches point of view. What you say really makes sense. I do have a local homegroup that I really haven't tapped into. Maybe I need to try that. Thanks so much for all of your support! Rhonda
This will probably be my son in a few years! It is crazy how young they have organized sports now. Here they start at 3. Jack is 3 and I can tell you, he is not ready for much organized anything!
