Mike told me last night he feels like our middle son Caiden would love kindgarten. Caidens very social, outgoing, etc. He loves going to this pre-k "school" its a woman from our church and she runs a pre school tyoe thing from her home for 10 kids or so. They do a lot of playing, abc's, colors etc. M-W-F for 2 hours. I know Caiden loves it, because on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays he begs me to take him to school LOL. Anyways Mike feels like Caiden would enjoy kindergarten...I do to. The problem isnt with our kindergarten here...its the next school up, they do 1st through 3rd and we had a terrible time there with Noah. Thats why we homeschool. So would sending him to kindy just be tougher on him in the long run? Knowing what schools like and possibly not being able to attend school for 1st grade? Man I dont know...I keep thinking about this. My dh also said going to a private school is not an option...we'd have to drive 45 minutes each way to get the boys there. I know if we had a strong homeschooling group here my dh wouldnt hesitate to keep Caiden home. but as it is we dont really get any socialization with other kids. ok gotta run... Jackie
I don't really have any advice for you here. I think that's a really personal decision. I would like to wish you luck, though.
Well...I would hesitate to send a child to Kindergarden with the intention of taking him out of school. I don't really see the point in that. I could be wrong. Unless you think that he will go to school and not be homeschooled I see no reason to start him. Again, that is what makes sense to me but someone else may have another perspective. As far as socialization....what about the Y for sports, library story times and things of that nature. There are even story times at some book stores. Are there any homeschoolers in your area? You may be surprised. You could set up a meeting at your local library for homeschoolers and see what happens. If there is little support where you are I am sure you aren't the only one looking to get involved with a group.
This is just from personal experience, but if we had it to do all over again we never would have sent dd to ps K. We ended up pulling her mid year last year due to lack of academics there. For 3-4 months she and I had a horrible times. She missed her friends, she missed this, she missed that. I agree it's a personal decision. Not all kids react the same way to a regular classroom. Your little guy just may thrive. Good luck with your decision.
Personal opinions here, so please just blow me off... hahaha... To me the schools can be equated to say a drug dealer... And Kindergarten with all of its pretty colors and bright and shinny classrooms where the teacher actually loves her students and the children are generally safe and playful... is like the FREE CRACK that the drug dealer HOOKS you with... Knowing full well that once they hook you, most people will simply stay. I know. I know.... Most people would agree that I am weird... Just sharing. But I could NEVER assume to know what is right for your family. I do hope you find what is best for your family!
If you both are in agreement on the issue, then the decision seems obvious. The only thing I would question at this point is simply this: What was your purpose for wanting to homeschool him and would school fulfill that purpose or does your sons desires for classroom interaction now have greater priority?
Jen, thanks thats exactly how I feel too. No my dh and I are not in agreement on sending Caiden to school. I think our public school system here is lacking terribly. All of our schools are on academic probation...and they've been that way for years. The police dept. confiscated more drugs through our schools than they did from our city, thats just sad.. And the worst part is last week 4 teens commited suicide...2 were girls and did it because their boyfriends had broken up with them. My dh doesnt look at these facts when considering public school. He sees all the kids, crafts and all around fun, P.E., music, and library. Honestly whatever I choose to do my dh will support my decision. So maybe thats it...its not up to him. LOL Thanks for the replies..I dont know why this was bothering me so much. I guess I just needed other moms to use as a sounding board.
Hi Jackie, All I can offer is my experience with a similar issue. Our second son, Eli, is a very outgoing people person. Zach, the oldest, is quiet, reserved, and often got "lost" in a classroom setting. Zach has absolutely blossomed with homeschooling, but we really agonized over the decision to HS Eli this year. Last year both boys started out at the same private school. Eli was in pre-K, and loved it. However, when we started HSing Zach last January, it slowly became a headache for me to have one in school and one at home. Some days, Eli just wanted to stay home, too. I found that I really didn't enjoy having one in and one out. Our lives were still dictated by the school calendar, and there were some issues with Eli picking up bad words/behavior from the other kids. We are part of a HS group, but I was afraid that it still wouldn't be enough interaction for Eli because he's such a social butterfly. But my fears have basically been unfounded. We haven't even been to our group in two months because of our move, and Eli has been fine. We have occasional playdates with other kids, and he always jumps right in and plays with kids at the park, etc. Every once in a while, he'll ask to go back to school. And that's when we reply, maybe someday, but for now, we are a homeschooling family. I was afraid that my boys would fight more, having to spend so much time together. But they are closer than ever. Over the summer, if you asked them who their best friends were, they would name other kids. Just the other day they said that they were each other's best friends. It really warmed my heart, especially considering that there are four years between them. So if he has siblings, and you have ways of still getting him in a group setting every so often, he'll probably be fine. But of course I'm just sharing my experience and as we know...every child is different! I really think that the whole "social interaction with other kids" thing is highly overrated now.
I once talked to another hs mom who planned to send her Ker to school, then pull her out to hs her. She said she wanted the girl to experience K and make friends. At the end of K she planned to pull her out and hs. I found it cruel, myself. To me, imho, it should be one or the other.
Jennifer that's a good way to put it LOL. One of the reasons we had pulled dd was BECAUSE of the classroom- among many other things. But there was so much junk hanging on the walls, hanging from the ceiling, WAY too much overstimulation for dd. It's not wonder the poor girl was wired to the max by the time I picked her up every day.
Our K is 2 hours a day M-F. I pulled DD7 out of first grade at Thanksgiving w/o hubbys positive support. As he putted it, I do what I want but he stood by me. Now he's behind me and wants me to continue to school the kiddos. I stuck to how I felt and won. If you have the okay to do what ya want then go with how ya feel. Hubby sounds a bit like mine did. They have all the fun stuff @ school-lots of kids to play with during the day (so they think), crafts and other extras. DD7 is fine about going to school and then staying home. Her only issue is that she has to wait until PS is out to play with some of her friends. Plus she has to be around her little brother and sister all day, they tend to get on her nerves
IMO there's a difference between MWF preschool for a couple hours a day and fullday M-F kindergarten. I had both my 6 and 8 year olds in preschool just as you describe and they both LOVED it. I thought public school would be the same. Boy was I wrong! My 6 year old completed one year, and 8 year old two years before I transfered to the homeschool way of life. On that note, if you do decide to try a year of kindergarten I'm in the minority in that I think it won't hurt. It's because my kids have "been there, done that" that they NEVER ask to go back! LOL My homeschool friend has two kids and from time to time they wonder what ps would be like. They even asked my kids about it and were happy to hear my kids say they weren't missing anything.
Wow, that's a hard one. I don't envy you having to make that decision. (((HUG))) Could you just keep him going to other types of playgroups and such? Something that will still foster his inner-social-butterfly while getting homeschooled?
Honestly some kids are a good fit in public school. We tried it with Garrett, it wasn't a good fit so he is now home. We won't offer the other two to give it a try mostly because they are so attached to each other that it would kill Reagan's spirit to see Rylee go to school everyday while he was stuck at home without his best friend.
Thank you all for your advice. I'm still worrying about this...I would rather have Caiden home with his family. I was starting dinner today at 3:45 and I realized the public school kids were just getting off the bus! That really made me sad. They get on the bus around 7:15...thats an awful long day to be away from your family. I cant imagine sending my 5 yr old off to school for over 8 hours a day Monday through Friday, no thank you. My thought is that public/private schooled kids that say they love it really dont know what being homeschooed is like...I'm sure if they did they would say they prefer homeschooling to public school. I would think so anyways. Caiden doesnt really know what he's saying when he says he wants to go to the "big school".. He just knows his buddies are going there next year and he wants to be with them. He doesnt know its an all day/every day type thing. At home now he's nearly done with kindy here...he's beginning to read long vowels words, he's adding and skip counting. Telling time to the hour and half hour, he can count to 100, He's so far beyond a kindergartener in my opinion. I think he will be bored out of his mind if I put him in a kindergarten class room. I will just keep mentioning that Caiden is more "advanced" than most of the children going into Kindy. and that he will be bored. MAybe my dh will eventually see things my way.
My dd9 kept saying that she wanted to go to "real school" in K. We had just taken ds out of ps after 1st grade. We figured out that it wasn't really school that she wanted. It was the backpack and lunch box. We got her those for a co-op that we were involved in, and she was fine.
You might have something there. I'll talk to my ds about "school" maybe I can even get my dh to get our school area ready before too long. We need to buy our desks for our work area in our living room. Maybe I'll have to get posters and what not too. I can really make it school like if thats what he wants lol.
I would have to disagree with you there. Every child has different preferences, that is why we have so many choices when it comes to this topic. Not every child likes homeschooling just like every child doesn't like public or private school. Tanner is a classic example of this. For 3 years we did mock homeschooling as I ran a daycare out of my home. When his friends were gone he wanted nothing to do with "school work". For now, "school" is a better fit for him. I don't think it's fair to assume each child would be the same being that we don't know everyone's children, only our own. And of course we aren't going to get many positive responses to "public school" here as this is a homeschooling forum.
I just read a post yesterday on a local forum from a mother desperate about how to handle her tween daughter because all she wants to do at school is socialize and pierce her body in places that her parents would not allow. I was thinking how funny it is that homeschoolers are criticized for not being properly socialized and then the public school parents are fighting against the results of it from the other direction. It really comes down to who will be training the children. At school, their greatest influence is not the parents nor even the teachers, but their peers. Immature groups of children, who vie to be the authority of a group, decide what is cool and what is not, as well as how to treat others who fit or don't fit their cool status. While my daughter loves to play with children, she does not have any reason to understand this structure, nor do I ever wish for her to do so. She needs to understand that authority is a responsibility, not something that should be given to another immature child, who most likely will use authority irresponsibly. She needs to evaluate what the group is doing before she goes along with hurting others for the sake of keeping her cool friends. Yes, I do believe that even young children can be influenced in just a few short weeks to begin trusting their peers more than their own parents and so school is not really an option we consider in our home. Children live for the moment, that is why parents with more experience should be the authority, because parents can see beyond this moment to the possible future results of one small decision made today.
My personal opinion is if you're going to pull a child out after K then it's not worth it to send them for that one year. I never dreamed of homeschooling until after one year of Kindergarten. It's sad that one year of K made me re-think my position on HS. I have a friend in MA who HS 5 kids & I thought "great for her but that's not for me". Here I am. My daughter went to Christian PK at 3 & 4 years of age & loved it. I loved the teachers & she really loved the kids. Then, K rolls around & the charter school teacher did not seem to love or even like kids. This was half day K. We switched her to PS after Christmas & it went slightly better but the all day thing was ridiculous to me. There was one boy who was often taken away to the principle by the campus police-in K! He also flipped people off so my kid wants to know what that means-in K! Mid 1st grade my daughter referred to her PS memories as "the days that haunt her". Now I know she is dramatic but it "haunts" her? She's "haunted" by Kindy? I am well aware that lots of kids love it but I'm not even going to bother with my 4 year old son. He's going straight to HS. I'm sure you will do what is best for your family.
