why do I homeschool because it is so difficult ? i am now into my 1st month of hs. i think I had the great idea, that my son was difficult to get along w/ because i wasnt able to tie heart strings w/ him cuz he was at school all day, now that he is home, i realize it is just his personality i do not like. i of course love him, but our personalities do not go well together. i even had to thought that i must hate myself in some way to want to put myself thru this very difficult day, because at some moments i feel so crazed, the 2 year old screaming and throwing toys, 5 yr old whining because she thinks her work is too hard, and the 9 yr old boy getting us off track w/ his silliness, or bad atitude. thank GOD the 1 yr old is usually napping in the morning when we do most of our schooltime. i believe homeschooling is best but i underestimated how impossible i feel it is to accomplish anything. yes, we get thru the lesson, but i am not enjoying myself. i wanted hs to be fun and a time to grow closer to my children, but to be honest i am so sick of them after we finish i need a long break!i don't want to just endure or survive, i want to enjoy hs. do you enjoy homeschooling or do you do it because it is duty/service to your family? example i do not like to clean the house but i do it w/ a servant's heart for the LORD. is it the same w/ hs?
It will be ok, I have a son with a bad aditude, strong will, we but heads alot! I almost am in tears a lot over it, He just has a different learning style, needs more attention than the others. But I am so determined to get through to him. I know he is so smart and it really drives me crazy some days when it takes him for ever to just do one page of work, but when I have him alone, sit next to hime and ask him the questions he answers them and does the page so quickly, it just doesn't take much to get him distracted, (with 3 other kids around). Keep up the good work, WE all have days like your having.
I felt kinda like this years ago when I first started homeschooling my older daughter. Our personalities are so different- she is so like her dad- always in a hurry, so her work isn't very neat- where I am meticulous and perfectionistic when it comes to anything on paper- it was very hard for me to learn (over the years- it does take awhile) to relax and learn to work with her, not against her. You said it's only been a month........maybe you need to slow down, take a deep breath, and start over, so to speak. I know that, with my oldest, I have learned what seems to work best with her, and have bought curriculum that fits her needs, and is something that suits me as well. My youngest is 5, and she amazes me how she actually begs to learn each day. 5 is really young, maybe you're overwhelming your 5 year old and need to slow down a bit. Could be in just a month or so, she'll be ready for more.
I have a son just like yours! He is 8. I have spent a lot of time crying over him and his horrible attitude about school. I used to argue with him all the time and it would take him FOREVER to get his work done. Now, we have reached an understanding that his job is to learn, get his schoolwork done well and in a timely manner, and my job is to teach him. He can find something to enjoy and make it a pleasant time for both of us, or he can make it a horrible time and bear the consequences(sp?) of his actions. Losing his allowance for the day, extra work, extra chores, losing a privilege for a week if it is a particulary bad day. I know homeschooling can seem like a lot more than you bargained for, but know that everyone feels that way at one point or another. It helps me on the days I feel like a complete failure to remember why I am doing it. I read a lot of homeschooling books and books about the current state of our country's public education system and they keep me motivated even in the toughest of times. Find your own concrete reasons and they can help make it through the day. You are just starting out and you WILL get the hang of it and so will your kids. Know we are out here rooting for you and here to give you a boost on the hard days!
Oh YES!!!! My first year was great, but I had two young girls. Later on I got serious burnout. And yes, 9 yr old boys have been the toughest ones to get school work from. I still have days when I wish I didn't "have to" homeschool. I do enjoy it, but I get overwhelmed easily. Try reading some of Ray and Dorothy Moore's books for suggestions and encouragement. Try to think of one thing you really do like about youor son. Praise him for it. Pray that God will show you ways to express love to him, and more areas you can praise him for. It can be so hard when personalities don't mesh. With all my kids over age 6 I can say that I have had a season of difficulty. Some of them it was just a few months. My firstborn daughter and I went head to head and round and round for about two years. Now that she is 16 we are doing great. Hang in there. It will get better. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Go on a few field trips, read some boy books together. (G.A. Henty's books are historical fiction and very exciting. My boys love his books.) Make a paper mache volcano. Play checkers. Reading aloud to your kids does count as school, and it does a lot for family unity. ~tap-tap~ That's my conscience! It has been a long time since I read a book to my gang. I better let them pick up a book. Congrats on surviving the first month! Blessings to you and yours.
I think people experience this no matter choices they make in life. We often question why we are doing what we're doing since things don't seem to be going well. I have done it for just about everything honestly....my education, my marriage, having kids, at various jobs, teaching public school, teaching homeschool, sending my kids to private school, homeschooling them, etc. I just have to remind myself of all the positive aspects and know that it's just a bad day.
Also, the easy thing to do would be to give up and send the kids to school (have thought about it) but I think its in the nature of the homeschool parent not to give in to whats easy. although home schooling is not for every one.
Oh, me. Just when I think I'm all alone!! I just told Jeanne the other day I will send her to school next year rather than tolerate the grousing and shrieking 'I DON'T KNOWWWWWW!!!!' In the majority Jeanne cooperates, and she'll even do school on Saturday if we need to. I just get tired of the crap sometimes.
Huck, I think what you describe is a common feeling... I remember thinking the same thing the first time I pulled Andrew out of school, wondering if I had all the screws in my head twisted in tight or if they were warped. I struggled to be "just like the school does it" and fell flat on my face. Then I backed off a bit. I switched gears and found other fun ways of teaching the same stuff... Andrew is not a paper/book learner - he hates it with a passion (especially math) so when I realized that he's a hands on learner that made my life (and his days) so much easier. Can I ask... how many hours a day do you try to teach? I ask this from experience. I tried desperately to teach the full school day (just like the school does) - what a task that was :roll: I had sat down on Saturdays and planned the following week's lessons... when I tried to teach the full day, I was out of stuff to do by Wednesday and had too much time on my hand for the rest of the week. As you homeschool, you will learn that it doesn't take as long to teach the things the public schools teach (because your numbers are much lower and for the most part, the child tends to be more co-operative with one on one - that's not to say they're always that way). Can I suggest that because you're switching gears from public to home school that you just take the time to learn about how your child ticks... what ways they learn best, their temperment, etc. (I'm not suggesting that you're not in touch with your child - just learning more about him). It does get better... your story is a familiar one to me and I'm happy to report that Andrew and I are so super close right now - I love all of my boys to the depth of my soul, but Andrew and I are so much closer because of the home school experience we have together. This isn't something that might happen overnight... it will take time, but it is SO worth it. Hang in there. You CAN do it.
Hi, Huck! I, too, have a 9yo boy (catching a theme here? ). It seems to be universal to have these clashes as they are growing into young men. They are ready to be independent but lack the selfdiscipline...yada yada yada...I know it's probably sounding redundant, huh? Sometimes, just to have a chuckle on a rough day with hubby I'll imagine that he is that 9yo boy and suddenly things get into perspective with my own son. You know they will grow up and you know that the time you invest in them now will get them through these phases and onto mature (in most cases ) manhood. It's the boys who don't have parents investing in them daily that have the harder time making it through to the other side, kwim? This is our second consecutive year of homeschooling (did half a year of 1st grade at home, too) and I can agree with others that it takes a little while to adjust. I just made a mental note the other day when I realized that my attitude toward homeschooling had changed from have to to WANT TO. It didn't happen overnight. It was so gradual that I didn't even really notice when my inward transformation occured--but praise God it did!!! Every good thing that God desires of us comes with some testing. We all want to help you pass it! I'm so glad you are here on this forum....these ladies are the reason I am a happy homeschooling mom, now....I needed them when I knew to pray but couldn't and they have been one of the biggest blessings in my life. Thanks guys!
