I don't belong to any groups now, but I wouldn't rule it out in the future--more as a way for ds to know other homeschoolers than for educational help, though.
I belong to a local group that I love but I also have freinds who do not belong to a group. To me it just depends on the group and what you are looking for. Our group does a co-op which sd enjoys and while she is in class I can get work done or hang out with other Moms. They do field trips but we really have not done any of them. I like belonging because it is a great way for me to find out what is available for events or resources in our area. They also have some good speakers occassionally. I also like the fact that through our group we found out that there was another hs family right down the block from us. We also both had 5yr olds who are now best friends. So for us that made it worth it. I think that groups are fine but no a necessity. If you know what you want to do and happy with it then why bother.
I guess I just am just weird..lol. I prefer to not have many friends. It seems the more friends you have the more people expect things from you. I also have been very badly betrayed by a friend who was supposed to be my bff. We had been friends since 6th grade and I had done things for her I totally didn't approve of (paid for and took her for an abortion ), and she ended up cheating with Garrett's bio father. I think that did it for me. I hate how catty women can be I guess.
I am speaking of the kids friendships, adults can be another story all together, but I know my dd needed a friend as she was very meloncholy prior to making two friends at homeschool group. We mostly just do the park day and one co op, this year it will be a state history where we get together once a month and discuss what we have been learning, do a feild trip a month to a historical site and that much I can handle. I know what you mean re catty women, I have always been leary of having more than one good friend at a time because of this, I hung more with the guys growing up cause they were more real. Lol! funny eh? I hear from so many women the same things re our gender it makes me wonder how many of us wander around alone because of our past hurts? I am glad that things are going better for y ou now and hope you do find a true friend someday.
I had a friend that would flirt with my dh and she was always touching him! :evil: He was always uncomfortable with it but she always seemed to be coming on to him. I never trusted her around him. Growing up as kids she always wanted what I had, guess she didn't limit that to dolls and hair ribbons.
I too usually had mostly male friends. Now my hubby is my absolute best friend, better than any female friend I have ever had! Garrett does scouts, and has some friends through that.
Thanks Katie. I'm over all of it now.. it was years ago now. But this sounds soooooo familiar! I could have written it.. but he would also return the touching, flirting stuff. Man was I naive back then!
We are loosely part of a group, but mainly just for DS some social time. Without it he wouldn't see other kids very often during the summer, esp. During the spring/fall he is involved with sports so he is around other kids some then. It's mainly just for social time - and the group we are involved with is rather small, and we rarely do things all together, usually just 2-3 families at a time. I enjoy when we all get together, too.
guy friends :lol: Me too!! Does this explain why we all get along so well? I can just imagine all of us together at a park. Playing with our kids and having a ball.
Ya know, it is sad that some folks grow up lacking in thier hearts to the point that they think they need to covet, or want and take what others have. That is one more reason for us to make sure our kids get what they need. And as I keep telling my teen to shelter them as we see fit. I know sometimes they don't realise that it is for thier own good, but we have lived life before them. But we also have to help them by teaching them how to choose the right friends.. the kind that wont take our toys etc. I have one child who had a hard time with picking the right friends for years... I think he has the hang of it now! I had to not let certain kids come to play, now I have explained to my youngest the same thing, that some friends y ou can be freindly with but not get close to because you can't trust them. Others are good and kind and you want to hang with those ones when you can... a good lesson would be how to choose a good friend and how to know the difference wouldnt it?
We have a lot of homeschoolers at church, so although we haven't joined the group in our part of town, our kids know a lot of other homeschool kids. We are so involved at church at this point, I don't really want to add more things to do.. We get more than enough socialization as it is! Eventually we might join the homeschool sports group for PE, but Joy isn't ready for that yet.
We spent a LOT of time on that very thing in our first few years hsing. Dd had attended ps for Kinder & the teacher told them that they were all friends, not classmates, friends. So, when she would come home telling us that someone hurt her it was "One of my friends kicked me" or "One of my friends punched me" or "One of my friends was making fun of me." We tried explaining that a friend wouldn't treat you like that. A friend wouldn't refuse to play with you, make fun or you, or physically harm you because you are different. But her teacher kept telling her "They're your friends." It wasn't until after we got her out of ps that we finally started to get through to her. We spent a lot time talking about what a real friend is, how to decide if someone is a real friend, and how to be a good friend. She's finally got it, but she's one of those kids that feels the need to have a lot of friends (so unlike me, I've always had just a few close friends & been happy with that). That's why her therapist wants us to get her into some structured activities, so she can make more friends. I just hope that she remembers everything we've talked about regarding what a true friend is, when we get her into these things & she starts meeting lots more kids.
I am a part of a few yahoogroups but that's about it. We meet at a local park to let the kids play - but I don't feel a closeness really to any of the women. Honestly - some are really petty - LOL. I have 2 friends that I am close with - 1 lives in Colorado (she moved) and one lives down the street. But it's nothing like my friendship with my husband. Don't feel a real need to have a "group" - but I do like to get out some and sometimes I like to hear the gossip (some of it is better than a romance novel!!)
You know Sommer, this is a good thread to start. Yes, I use to go to a homeschool group when I first started homeschooling I was one of those mother that believe my children need the S. word more so I join to try to give them more. I stayed a year, it was the longest year I ever been through. It reminded me so much of ps the mothers were the worst of the bunch. When we join we just moved to the area. So, we didn't know anyone, everyone should come and greet us don't you think. No they didn't and they all had there little groups. So, and So sat here and so and so sat there. It was so sad. They were showing there children this. Me I like to talk to everyone, when I would go from group to group and talk to everyone what were they talking about, well you guess it. What others were wearing, doing or what ever. Hmmmmm and this was a Christian group don't think so. So, we drop out and done alot better on our own.
I hate catty women. I have never had many female friends because I truly can't stand it. I have two wonderful girlfriends I have been close to for 25 years. I have many casual friends and moms of Sam's friends. But my husband and few close friends are all I need. I am NOT worried about the S word.
We found a group the very first year we started. I do believe at the time God put them in my path. I really needed support and encouragement that first year. We made some wonderful friends but after a couple years the group drifted apart. We managed quite well without a group until my son became interested in sports. At that time we joined another group. Again, God was at work and directed us where we needed to be. We were involved with this group for another 5 years which covered the time my son was involved in baseball. In this second group, we were not involved with them for academic purposes but more for the social and physical aspects of participating in sports. While our family does believe learning is important, our primary goal is for our children's spiritual education. We found the majority of people to stress the worldly education more than we did so we really ended up not having much in common or share too many common views on how to raise children. We are not currently involved in any groups. However, I am confident that if the need arises with my daughter the good Lord will direct us again. In everyday life, I personally find that the best friends I have are the ones that I don't have to invest a lot of time in in order to maintain a friendship. Some people do need contact with people in their lives everyday but I seem to do best on my own. I am better able to focus on the important things in my life and not be drawn into the drama of others. Honestly, being on my own keeps me spiritually healthier. I hope my children can grow up to find they do not need to count on someone else to make them feel fulfilled. Our family is very independent. My husband and I both lost our parents years ago so we have always taken care of our own without imposing on anyone else. crazymama, I think you said it well! "I like things my way and honestly don't like to be told how to do something.. unless I am asking for ideas. Maybe it's just my personality that makes me feel this way... but really, am I the only one who feels confident enough to do their own thing without a group to hold my hand?" Of course, on occasion, it is nice to have a place like this board to vent, look for suggestions, and find encouragement. It is just not something manditory to get through daily life!
Hey! I got my husband that way! (not met... but got) There was a ball at the end of the slide and he thought I was going to bust my bu... however, I hit the ball, and somehow balanced. Love at first slide. I will join the local group, cuz they go skiing for cheap cheap! twice a month in Jan,Feb, and March. Yea!!! (plus it is a 3 hour drive and it is nice to share it with people!)
