Have any of you ever felt like you were the manners police? Lately my 7-yo stepdaughter has been displaying horrendous manners, and I believe they were always that bad but no one ever noticed. She picks at food with her fingers, shoves large bites in her mouth, chews with her mouth open, slurps her drink, even belches loudly or passes gas loudly at the dinner table. I've been on her for a while, but my DH thinks it's funny. He doesn't seem to think manners are important. She seems better in public, but I think good manners should be used at home as well. But then I end up being the "bad guy" and always harping on manners. Do you ever feel that way?
I definitely agree that manners start at home. It took me years to "train" my hubby that my house is not a manners-free zone just because it's "not in public" and my son doesn't get away with bad manners either. It's a lot easier to be polite and well-mannered if it is a habit, not something you have to be thinking about constantly when you are out. Not to mention the fact that I feel I deserve as much respect and proper treatment as some random member of the "public". Why on earth would you behave out of the house but not in it? :angel:
I can't stand bad table manners. If they don't learn to be polite at home it will come back to haunt them someday. My daughter broke up with a very sweet man who had such bad table manners and she just couldn't stand it. I also can't stand to see a hat on inside the house or church. I tell mine to take their ball caps off as soon as they enter the door. Picky? Maybe, but I would rather be the one that corrects them now than someone else later on down the road. And don't get me started on telephone manners! I don't know how many kids and adults have called our unlisted number and the first thing they say is, who is this? We all say, who were you calling and you wouldn't believe how many people act like you have insulted them by asking.
I'm awful. My kids HATE my corrections. I hated my Dad's correction of me. HATED IT. But...when we are out in public my kids are PRAISED for their good manners - they wouldn't act that way in public if I wasn't strict about it at home! LOL I think manners are very important because they teach us what it means to be respectful to others. Someone somewhere here has a thread on respect I just read. It so true with manners. Whether it be chewing with our mouth closed. Pardoning ourself when we pass gas rather than laughing, or opening the door for someone, etc. I would keep doing it. My kids hate the phrase "Ask me again with manners and respect.". No please? No pass!!
yes you want to correct her on all of it, but pick the one or two things that you feel need the most help and work on those first........ if you do them all at once she will just feel like your the mean step mom.
My husband is another one who thinks it's all funny. It gets very irritating to me that I'm constantly trying to raise a youg lady, and he constantly undoes what I do!
yes, get her now while she is young or she will end up with manners like my 91 year old MIL which are something else. GROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Make sure dh is on your side or you will be beating up a dead end wall.
