[font=Garamond, Times, Serif]I went to the doctor this afternoon and he booked me for another set of blood work today and I was supposed to go back on Monday. Before I left his office, I had the full treatment... everything looked fine at that point.[/font] [font=Garamond, Times, Serif][/font] [font=Garamond, Times, Serif]Within an hour, Tracy called me at work and told me that I'm in the process of losing this baby too. The test results on Monday were positive and today they're negative meaning that I'm in the process of miscarrying this baby too. Needless to say I left work early.[/font] [font=Garamond, Times, Serif][/font] [font=Garamond, Times, Serif]I'm in shock... I was adjusting to the idea and now this... not what I wanted by any means but this is why I was only cautiously excited.[/font]
Oh, Honey, my thoughts and prayers are with you! I wish I had words to help, but I know nothing will. Just know you're not alone. <<<<<HUGS>>>>>
Brenda, I'm so sorry! Sometimes we don't know why things happen, but we can know that God is with us through everything, and He wishes He could just take all the hurt away and give us the desires of our hearts. And someday He will!!! But for now, He wants us to know that He is with us always and will give us peace! We're here for you, praying for you, and wishing you the best during this time! Lots of hugs to you!!!
Because of my cycle pattern in January (unusually light and unusually short) the doctor thought that I probably conceived in December which would have me at that 9th week critical point. We're all coping as best we can right now, I'm obviously having the worst time of it (because I'm the one who has to face the cramps from the pitts of &^*! ). The boys are upset (Andrew especially - who is very protective of Mommy), but this is something we'll have to work through together as a family and it will (someday) get easier for us. Everybody grieves in different ways and so it will be a one day at a time thing. I'm struggling right now with why this was allowed to happen only to have to go through this. I can not for the life of me understand it but there must be a purpose and so I look forward to the reasoning for it. Thank you all for your kind words...
I never lost a baby through miscarriage, and I have a question. You can be in 'the process' of losing a baby?? If a 'process' is starting, can't the doctors intercede??
No, usually there's nothing to be done. Wish that there were! Often the emotional aspect is more difficult than the physical, plus people hear that you're expecting and come up to you, all excited for you and meaning well. It's hard to express thanks while letting them know the truth.
Becky~ Doctors can stop pre-term labor. But, this early into a pregnancy, there's nothing they can do to stop a miscarriage. As much as we mothers who have experienced it probably wish there were, in all honesty there is a reason for it (just that it's so hard to find!) Jackie's right~ alot of the pain of a miscarriage is emotional. Just the other week at the post office I noticed a lady I used to go to church with looking at me really weird. She said "how's the pregnancy going?" It's still kinda hard (even after 4 months) to say "oh, we lost the baby". I'm sure she felt like a heel! Brenda~ Hope your pains have subsided some and you can rest this weekend.
The last time I miscarried before I was able to carry Noah, the doctor who I saw told me that the miscarriage was God's way of looking after a child who was going to be so severely disabled or something "critical" was either lacking or not there with the fetus that it wouldn't be able to survive. That was the one thing told to me that made it 'easier' for me. "In the process" in our case means that while the physical exam checked out fine (the cervix being closed as it should have been), the blood work indicates that the fetus is not viable (or has already died) and therefore it was only a matter of time before everything else started to take its course. I'm not sure how much emotions play into losing the baby and whether the cramping last night was in part due to the stress of the news (by that I mean the severity of the cramping - whether it was fueled even more by the stress of knowing what was to come). From what I understand and based on everything I personally had going on, it sounds almost like this would have been a tubal pregnancy anyway so this may be God's way of saving my life. There are other things I have to be watching for over the next several days, so I'm in for a long haul with this. The worst part of any kind of miscarriage (in my opinion anyway) are the emotions that go with it (and the pain plays a factor too). We were just adjusting to this news and then to go through this so suddenly and so fast, there was no time to prepare for it. I was thinking last night of how horrible a feeling to know that within you is a fetus who has died and then not be able to do anything to save it. Tracy, driven by excitement, told everyone we knew and so he faces the difficult task of telling eveyone what has happened since then. He's shook up too right now, but I think he has put the tough front on for my sake (although I wish he wouldn't).
Brenda~ This is NOT a tubal pregnancy. If it were a tubal pregnancy, your tests would still be showing as positive. And, with a tubal pregnancy, you would have to have it surgically removed. If not, as in my case, it would rupture and require emergency surgery. With my miscarriage in September, I started bleeding on a Saturday and went to the dr. on Monday. My cervix, at that point, was totally dilated. I had an ultrasound done, which indicated that they baby was no longer in the uterus (having had a previous ultrasound and seeing the baby). So, I had a d&c done right there. Two weeks later, I was still showing a positive pregnancy test. I would highly recommend you get into your doctor right away and find out just exactly what is going on. I'm concerned about you.
I'm completely numb on this right now... I don't understand why my cervix is not dilated (like it should be at this point)... it was totally intact yesterday (closed as it should be for a pregnancy) but for the HGC levels to come back as low as they did - to a negative point when just Tuesday the serum test came back positive (initially I didn't buy one of the shelf at the store to check - I called and asked for a serum test which they did - when it came back positive then I bought one because of my disbelief). This makes absolutely no sense to me at all... the bleeding I had was only a small amount and it has stopped. The cramping comes and goes (although I do wish that would stop too). I am going to see the doctor at the hopspital on Monday (only because he's on call there) and will hopefully have some more answers by then...
Brenda, sometimes our bodies act weird. For me, I had very heavy bleeding. I went to the ER, and they said that I had lost the baby. So the next day I went into the doctor, and my hormone levels were STILL elevated. Which meant that they wanted me back in two weeks for anther blood test. It took nearly two months for my hormone level to drop to where it belonged. And of course, no one was telling me ANYTHING! I would go in for the test on a Monday, with them "promising" to call "in a day or two". On Friday, I would call THEM, and of course no one would answer the phone so I would leave a message. Usually they would get back with me on Monday or Tuesday, saying they "didn't know", and could I come back in.... I went in for the blood test a total of about 4 times. And then, a year later, I recieved a BILL for just ONE of those times!!! It was with a letter saying that this was a "final notice", etc. Never mind that 1) it was my FIRST notice, and 2) it was covered by the insurance. Oh, I was FURIOUS!!! Even then, it took me quite some time to get it worked out.
It's all so confusing to me right now... the nausea, light-headed, racoon eye (from being SO tired) feeling still exists. I just don't understand...
Oh Brenda, i am so sad for you. A major disappointment, I have you and Tracy in my prayers.Surround yourself with people that love you.We are all here.
I lost my first one about this same time in my pregnancy. It's tough going through the physical pain, but the emotional takes longer to work through! I wish we knew why also, but God is still there for us, even through these bad times. I'm sorry for you too Heidi! We are praying still for you Brenda, and for emotional healing for you also Heidi!
