I have a question, not sure if you can help me or not I've got one daughter that is puzzling me. I did a search and I looked at things online to look at learning styles and to be honest I can't figure her out. What we've been doing for the past two years isn't working this year for her. She used to be workbook driven, task oriented (check the stuff off the list and move on) She isn't like that anymore and I can't figure her out. She doesn't want to do anything, doesn't want to try, doesn't want to make crafts, doesn't want me to read to her, doesn't want to read to me, doesn't want to write, doesn't want to draw. She will watch tv, but I try really hard to limit that because it will get out of hand if she watches too much. (we are a PBS/educational tv viewing family only -- don't have cable either) But I just can't figure out a way to motivate her. She will read on her own, she loves to read and gobbles up chapter books, she likes to go to the library. She will do somethings on the computer, like spelling city. She does like oral quizzes with her sister (we do "spelling bees" almost daily, LOL!) But she has this aversion to math and writing all of a sudden and her handwriting is getting worse not better. I had her eyes checked and she doesn't need glasses anymore (she had them last year but they said her vision improved since wearing them) I just want to have fun teaching her, but she is just being a real challenge all of a sudden and I'm at a loss. My other daughter is Miss Participation -- whatever it is, she wants to do it. LOL. They are both 7, doing 2nd grade work. We use Abeka for language/spelling/writing. We use Horizons for math, Lifepack for Bible. They both like the bible curriculum, but it is still new I added that this fall. I try to do a "no books" day and do stuff outside, science experiment, messy stuff and she just isn't interested. I just can't figure it out. Thanks for reading!
You made me think of a university that requires its students to do little more than read great books. I forget the name of it, but we came across it when our older daughter was looking at colleges. For math, for example, the students must read biographies and works of the great mathematicians. The same is true for every other subject. Can you garner your daughter's interest in various subjects by tapping into her love of reading? For example, I'm currently reading a biography of Michael Faraday, pioneer of electricity and fine Christian man. For history, there are some great biographies of American pioneers. For geography, there are some wonderful travel writers. Most children's libraries have a good selection of biographies and travel books. PS - I found the name of that college so you understand what I'm saying. It's St. John's College.
My brothers are twins and what you describe sounds painfully familiar. Now that she is a couple of years into schooling with her sister, she might be going through a phase of competition, or rather, lack thereof. If her sister is Miss Participation, you can bet that she will try to be Miss Nonparticipation! She might just be trying to establish who she is or who she isn't. At first I was going to say it sounded an awful lot like childhood depression, which it could still be similar to; however, I think if you factor in being the twin of Miss Participation, you might be able to figure out how to solve the school issues.
I'm an identical twin myself, but we are as opposite as they come! I was "Miss Participation". I was the one getting straight A's in school. I was the teacher's pet. My sister was just as smart, but she wasn't motivated, she had different interests (mostly social), and she was a different type of learner. This might help: http://www.myhomeschoolingweb.com/planning/learning-styles/style-determining.htm I went straight to college after school ... scholarship, etc. She didn't. Now that her kids are getting into middle school, she's decided to go back to school again - and imagine that - she loves it. She's getting straight A's. She says she wishes she would've done this years ago when it was easy (no family to take care of while cramming for finals). I think if you can figure out her learning style and what's getting in her way, you can get through. It might take time, though. Competition was big in my house growing up. That was a help to me, but a hinderance to her. If there's any competition, you might get it out by doing two different programs entirely, but that means twice as much work for you. I'd start with figuring out her learning style first.
lol You have more than one issue happening here. I have identical twins & I remember really well what it was like when they began to separate from each other & try becoming their own person. What one is the other definitely will not be! This is sub~concious but unfortunately real. Find areas to validate each child ~ some skill they are good at & work from there. Your DD sounds like a visual learner to me. I have one who gleans nearly everything she learns from t.v, dvds, picture books etc & she's 14!!! She would do everything by watching t.v if she could. Math can be notorious for visuals. They can get visually overwhelmed if there's too much on the page for them at any one time so books with plenty of space around problems & that are visually attractive are a must. She may be having similar issues with reading ~ too many words to a page. This can be a problem even if she reads well. Try some white card under the line she is reading so she is only tacking one line at a time. CM may be worth looking at as they offer different ways to learn & dissiminate information that may work for your daughter. She may be quite creative. Does she do an instrument, an art class or drama? Good luck.
Just some thoughts.... From your description, it sounds like she leans visual to me also. Perhaps a concrete sequential, who needs a routine or set schedule for each day? Have you tried writing down the schedule for the day? Some children need to see what you have scheduled each day and are motivated by how much free time they will have after lessons are finished. She may dislike math, but if she sees that the math should only take her 20 minutes to do and then she will be done, she may try to make sure it does only take her 20 minutes. Perhaps she just needs something she likes to do that is all her own and one in which her sister does not participate so she is grounded in her own identity rather than a shadow of her sister.
These are just my suggestions, I do not have and was not and identical twin. I can totally see what others have suggested, it sounds like she's trying to be her own person, etc. First, I'd let her read - maybe just guide her reading - pick historical fiction, biographies of famous people, etc. Have her write short book reports (age appropriate of course) - there are forms out there where she can write up info about the book and a short synopsis, etc. I would say for things like handwriting and math that these are things that just need to be done. But, if she's not enjoying Abeka - maybe she could help you pick out what she would like. There are some kids who like to be a part of the process. My oldest, soon to turn ten, used to be a workbook girl. She used to be very goal oriented and wanted to check the boxes off, and be done. She's changed a bit. I've had to adapt her curricula to fit her new personality. My middle (a son) NEVER was a workbook person....but is forming into one. It think learning styles change as you grow. I know mine has. I'm not sure what computer based maths there are for that age, but maybe that would work better for her as well. Deep breath. You will figure it out.
I am thinking , reading with these I do nto have twins but have taken care of many in the past, if that counts for anything.. it makes sence to me what they are saying about the individualising of thier curric.. maybe she should switch to TT for math or MUS.. or even Life Pak math just to have something different, I figured one of the video ones would work better, there is SOS too? I think it starts in 3rd grade level though for math so you may have to check. IF she is into Screens, find her Math games online to do, once she finishes her horizon math work? As another option if getting a second math curric is not an option. I would get computer games for learning Math.. she is 7 ? ( they are 7?) She could get away with Master Blast Math or Jump Start Math for her grade level. They have also got soem Sholastics that come with a CDas well as book work. My dd went through the not wanting to write and not do anything but read her own stuff for a while, she is older though. She just wrote her first 500 word essay and it took a whole weekend but she got it and anothe rone written.. smaller on the second one. She could be choosing to write slopier for the sake of being her own self? Just a thought.
Thank you all for the replies! I haven't been able to reply until now. Steve: That is an interesting concept. I'm not sure though how I could find subject matter at her reading level for some of it, but I'll keep that in mind for future reference! Thanks! Brooke: Thank you. I understand what you are saying, I'm just still puzzled as to what to do. 2littleboys: Thank you. I did read that link you posted and it did help some. I'm thinking she is leaning more towards visual/auditory learner too. I'm not sure how to decrease the competition. I've tried putting them in separate things (same things different times even) and they complain that they miss their sister not being with them. It is like I can't win! LOL. CelticRose: thank you. With the Horizon's math it is pretty colorful and I think it has spaces and so forth around it like you are saying. Reading doesn't seem to be an issue, but I'll keep that in mind. By CM do you mean Charlotte Mason? I've just started looking into that, do you (or anyone) have a book or website to direct me to? seekingmyLord: Thank you. I've tried the schedules listed by time and check lists, neither of them like that. I've tried letting her break it up, or do this section that is blue then green, Work from the bottom to the top... One day I asked her if she would like to go upstairs and work (away from sister and me) and she was so happy! She completed her math in no time flat! I thought I had it figured out, I was soooooo happy too! She was able to get through her lessons in record speed, and they weren't sloppy, they were neat and right! The next day I asked her the same and she started off upstairs, but it quickly fell through and she didn't do hardly anything at all that day. I understand that they need to work at their own pace, but when she won't do hardly anything she is getting behind, this isn't struggling to understand, it is "I just don't want to do it" Does that make sense? She had a meltdown about clocks and time (45 minute) I have an owl that is a good visual aid, you set the clock and then push the button and it tells you in digital format what the time is. I offered to work with her with the owl to help her get through the section and she just melted down and refused to do it, wouldn't listen to what I was saying at all. That pretty much was the end of math for her for the day. At first I was thinking stuff was too hard for her... but this happened before she had gone upstairs to do her work. (when she did so well) Then that day rolled around and I don't think it is too hard, it is a "I don't want to" thing. kbabe1968 Thank you. Changing curriculum (buying something different) is not an option right now. I can look around maybe and see if I can find math online or something for her and then maybe come back to the books at some point. TeacherMom: Thank you. What is TT? Horizons are made from the same company as the Life Pac.. or do you mean have one have one kind of math book for one and one for the other? I understand that they need to be individuals, I rarely dress them the same, have their hair the same, we just never got into doing that too much. Once in a while they WANT to dress the same (they are ID and people often get them mixed up) Oh! and when I said my other daughter is "Miss Participation" I just meant that she is willing to try and do new things, she is a "go with the flow" kind of girl and my other one isn't at all! But thank you all, I'm hoping to get this figured out.
OH! I forgot to mention that they do take piano lessons. It started off at the same time, but now I take one one week and one the next, because it just works better that way. Although they both have their moments where they don't like the piano lessons and I don't want to force them, but I don't want it to be something where they just quit it because they don't want to practice, does that make sense? We have been in a few church dramas together (as a family) and they do quite well with that. Someone gave us two American Girl plays (Addy and Kiersten) and we "act" those out almost every day, they really enjoy doing those together.
