lisa, im so sorry, but i am peeing my pants im laughing so hard, that is too funny! i will have to use that, lol. if a male was reading this, they would think you wrote it wrong, but any mom will understand, lol
My 2 favorite discipline books are... Parenting with Love and Logic and Have a New Kid by Friday. You should be able to find them both at the library. Hang in there-I hope you find something that works.