a fellow homeschool parent says negative things about your curriculum choices? I have two good friends who are much more school-at-home than me. School to them is about textbooks, workbooks, and tests. School at our house is more about good literature and learning through life expreiences. We do use textbooks some, but I don't feel the need to plan a rigid schedule that we absolutley must adhere to each week. I KNOW that we all school differently, and if that works fo them- great. But twice, I've loaned these friends something of mine (curriculum) to look over. They wanted to see if they'd like it. The response I got from both was, "That's just not enough." Maybe I'm just being over-sensitive about it, but it bothers me, because I feel like my friends are saying I don't do enough with my kids. I would never make any type of rude comment about one of my friends curriculum choices!:?
I think you just have a style clash going on. Don't worry about it. Be confident that you know what is working for your family and they know what is working for theirs. If it bothers you, don't lend them anything to look at
Everyone has their own idea of what they feel their kids need. That is none of my business and I wouldn't tell someone they were wrong if they chose to school their kids differently than I schooled my kids. As far as anyone who has criticized our curriculum choice? My kids graduated last year always scoring above the 90th % percentile on their standardized tests administered by a thrid party, so I must have done something right!
Homeschooling is very dear to our hearts and we desparately want to do the right thing. We also work very hard at making it the best for our kids. So, it's easy to get a little sensitive every now and then to what we interpret as criticism. I agree that this is most likely a style clash. just be happy that your kids don't need a bunch of work, textbooks and stuff to effectively learn. lol. Nothing wrong with a traditional approach...but there is nothing wrong with untraditional also, after all that's part of why I homeschool.
I have always felt a curriculum should be catered to the student. Each child is unique and will have their own learning preference. I know my children learn more when I integrate activities and experiences into the lessons. The more I rely on textbooks the more bored they become. Don't sweat it! It sounds like you are doing a great job.
How do you deal with that? Ignore it! If what you're doing is working for you and your children...ignore them. I feel compared all the time...like I don't do enough, or I should be using this, or that. I have several friends who use Sonlight, and Math U See. I have one friend that is constantly telling me that I should try Sonlight, but when I read their "27 REasons NOT to use sonlight" I have 3 or 4 that I just can't get over, ya know? And Math U See, no matter how I tried to make it work, it just did not. Now....we do something "Sonlight-ish" and I used them to pick out some of our literature....but I can't hack THEIR scheudle, I have to be in control! LOL Anyway, you've got to do what YOU've got to do for YOUR family. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks. Are your children learning? Are they growing? Are they being exposed to great works of literature and loving them? Do THEY like how they're learning??? BE HAPPY WITH THAT and STINK ON THEM! Just my humble opinion. Big high fives and hugs from me, sounds like you're doing absolutely awesome!
I ended up distancing myself from a homeschool group in the area over something like this. Many in our hs group use homeschool charters, and I was talking about something with another mom who does not use a charter (we do). She all but bashed me over the choice - but she tried to do it in a nice way: "Oh, I could never have someone telling me what to do." "I don't want force my child to do what the state says." Oh, come on, I can read between the lines, and the more we talked, the more I really felt on the defensive about my choice. That is when I realized that I should not be in a group where I have to defend my "how to" homeschool. I didn't crash on her with any "no oversight" or "wow, it must be nice to have enough $$ not to need state funds!" How rude, you know? The best recommendation is the same as Kbabe - just distance yourself from them. Homeschooling is hard enough without added negativity and pressure from FELLOW homeschoolers!!! Good luck and keep doing what you need for your family!
ONLY in the 90th%? I don't know.... Sounds as if you really didn't have them doing enough! Should have worked them harder! Now, if you had used the same curriculum that *I* use...... :lol:
I would be curious as to why they thought it was not enough for them, but other than that I would not take it personally. Some parents need everything included in a curriculum and others would use the same resource as just part of their own personalized curriculum. Their children could have been using another resource previously that covered much of the material already or they need it to be user friendly because they are mostly self-educating. I would just be curious about another's review of the material, but I would not think much either way if they decided it would not work for them.
All forms of self righteousness are a drag, especially the homeschooling varieties. LOL Seriously, many folks become self righteous about their homeschool choices as if there is a true right and wrong way to go about things. These self-righteous homeschoolers come in as many flavors as there are homeschooling styles. The ironic thing is that most of them will be asking for help from the less righteous at somepoint when things are not perfect in paradise.
Oh yes, I use abeka and catch slack for that- the comments "it's so expensive" . I just smile and let it roll. We all make different choices. What ever works for each. Mama Bear 10% left for improvement - Really????????????? How could you live with yourself. Hehehehe
I encourage you to see text books and teaching aids as tools to help you with your home schooling efforts. I've seen excellent results by parents using any number of products on the market. A supportive and nurturing learning enviroment that results in producting an appetite for learning is far more important than "having the right textbooks". One of my favorite quotes comes from Mark Twain who said something like "I never let school get in the way of my education." Enjoy your kids and the new school year. Curt
Yes, I agree 100% with this. Righteousness is the perfect word for it. It drives me crazy when people slip into this attitude and it seems like we've been talking about them on here a lot lately. Why can't people be considerate of the feelings of others? I think it is based in insecurity and the need to compete with "The Joneses". I guess if someone said my curriculum choice was not enough for their kids I'd just remark that my kids got everything they needed from it and that was all that mattered. There is no "best" curriculum choice. They all have strengths and weaknesses and choosing one is a very personal decision because it is based on the child's ability, the child's learning style, and the parent's teaching style.
Sometimes when I get this attitude (not enough), I make a comment to the effect, "Well, we were really surprised at the things DS picked up about x and y and z - all from working with just this <insert whatever here>." Often, I wasn't *that* surprised, but it kind of gets across to the other person that there might be more going on here than they'd imagined...it can help them be open to the idea that while it might not be enough for their family, it's working for ours.
Sniff~sniff! You are right Lee, my kids aren't AS perfect AS I once thought. Thank you ladies for pointing that out. LOL:lol:
I had people telling me how they though LifePacs were a joke the first year I homeschooled. You know something? They worked for me. I made me feel VERY insecure with my choice, which was something I decided because of the ease of using it for the first year while I learned about my kids and such. Year 2 - we went with Ambleside and their % went up (dd was in the 98th% dang it... she ain't perfect yet!!).... and STILL used LifePacs for Math and people STILL told me they didn't work or were "junk"...... yet the same people would come to me for advice on implementing AO. DH told me I was to smile and help them the best I can and ignore their remarks and TRY to be a nice person. I did that and they still ask me for help and such - and now comment that I "quit" Ambleside by enrolling my son in Seton and I was wrong. <sigh> At this point I smile and just say it's what works for me. And no I don't help them anymore...I steer clear of running into them....
Geesh, MamaBear....where did you go wrong? I felt shame when my son got a 99% in english...I mean he failed! Math was even worse, he got a 90%...maybe more than that....I think it was over 90 but I only cared to prove to my relatives that homeschooling is not the end of education! LOL!!!
LOL And....................................the local ps has hired me on to be a part time teachers aide. Gee, what's up with that?