This is sort of related to homeschooling based on what he says about schools. It's interesting either way. Though I don't think he's any sort of expert, it's more food for thought.
I forgot about habbo hotel! heh sorry distracted for a second there. Not that I'm a parent yet, so i don't have that to base it on, but i believe he is right to an extent. I think the idea of letting a 2 year old run rampant wherever they want is ludicrous. They could, and have been, run over that way or strangled by some random string or cord in the house or got electricuted etc etc., and i know how constantly drunk parents can be from both my and my fiance's side, and i would never wish that on a kid no matter how well they got off, but i do believe that parents need to relax more, let kids be kids, and enjoy some time to themselves... and not let kids play with the gadgets so much and have them go outside and use their imaginations & not give them everything they want at your expense. IMHO he makes some good points and some bad points. he mentions that there is a line between carefree and careless and it sounds to me like he has crossed it, but he still has some good points and he has raised 3 of his own and i haven't raised any yet so who am i to judge? but anyways, there is my viewpoint
So I can stop feeling guilty for laying around reading on Sunday afternoons and let the kids find ways to entertain themselves? Yes!
This paragraph made me cringe. This is literally how my husband's mother and step-father raised him. They lived in an apartment that backed up to a very large grassy area. On an almost daily basis there would be a few families (up to a dozen on weekends) come over to their house. The adults would sit and drink at picnic tables and the kids were regularly ignored. They regularly ignored my husband, would leave him home while they went on trips with his younger brother. They even sent his brother on a trip to Europe. His younger brother received a lot of attention and protection from his mother. So he kind of had the opposite kind of parents, at least when they weren't super drunk. Their father lived a couple of states away and called a couple of times a year and sent his monthly obligation of $14 in child support on an almost regular basis when he wasn't working under the table. At the age of 6, my husband was left at home without adult supervision while his mother worked to watch his 4 year old brother. Since they often had no food in the house, they would frequently walk up a huge hill to a pizza place that would give them each a free slice of pizza. My husband left home at 16, sometimes sleeping on the streets when he couldn't find someone to stay with. His mother once honked, waved and smiled at him when she passed him on the streets one day. While he is trying to rebuild his relationship with his mother, he still harbors a lot of resentment for the way he was (or wasn't) raised. To be fair though, if you look at how my husband turned out compared to his brother who was given much more attention, my husband fared much better. Although he never completed the 10th grade, he runs a successful business employing college graduates, we own a house with a pool, we are happily married in our 15th year of marriage and he's a great father. His brother, on the other hand, doesn't have a car, often couch surfs, rarely sees his child, and is constantly borrowing money. So, while I think there were some good ideas in the article, I think that if you become too idle at parents you probably will not have happy children, although they may turn into some pretty amazing adults... just don't expect to have any kind of relationship with them when they grow up.
I think his carefree vs. careless line is critical to understanding the idea behind the whole thing. And also keep in mind that he is European, so drinking is a cultural thing more so than in the US.
"The great thing about children is that they like being busy. Since parents like being lazy, it makes sense for the children to do the work. This idea was partly explored in the 19th century, when children as young as five were sent into the factories. The fact that meddlesome liberals have since introduced child labour laws does not need to prevent the idle parents exploiting their own offspring." Yes, I'll be directing housework from the couch today. Obviously, he was making lots of funnies to make a serious point -- that's for posting.
I think it is a little over the line, but maybe he was exaggerating for his point to be made. I DO like the idea of NOT signing kids up for every activity. I now can stop feeling guilty about it.
I was really enjoying the article up until that paragraph. I agree with not overscheduling kids. We recently moved to a new town and joined a homeschooling group that is just getting started. It's a small group with about 20 families. The group leader was telling me that right now they are doing a Social Studies activity once a month, a Science activity once a month, park days on Fridays and a field trip once a month. Then she was telling me how they will be trying to add on many more activities to the schedule. She was almost apologetic that they didn't have more to offer and told me I should also join the other hs groups in town for more activities. I just smiled and listened as she talked about all of these activities we should be doing, but in the back of my head I was thinking, "No way!". We're doing the Science and Social Studies days with the group but haven't even been to the park days on Fridays, because I refuse to schedule more than one thing for the family in the same day and my girls do Jui-Jitsu on Wed, Fri and Sat.
Seems to me that the point of child rearing is to raise kids to be able to care for themselves one day. How on earth this 'method' does that, I have not one clue. sounds like old fashioned laziness and neglect to me.
Me, too! I had a discussion with a mom recently about how I only let my kids sign up for one activity/sport each. She was mortified and went on to list all the activities her son was in. With ds13's scout activities, dd11's swim schedule, and dd8's ballet classes, I can't imagine putting them in other things. I had been feeling guilty about not letting dd6 participate in anything structured yet, but her time will come. She's going to be on our HOA summer swim league with her sister, so that'll give her something!
My son is mentally retarded so getting out of the house is a challenge for us sometimes. I most certainly do not let my kids get so busy that it wears me to a frazzle and we are living on TV dinners. I only let my kids do one thing at a time too, AND it has to fit the schedule. NO rat race for us. I also do not let my kids do anything 'organized' on Sundays. I told them from day one, they are not missing church to do any extra things. The only other thing is no cheer leading if it involves wiggling your tooshie around with no clothes on!
We only allow our daughter to choose one extra activity. She recently started karate and enjoys it very much. The classes are 2 nights a week, so she really doesn't need any other activities.
