I agree with this. College is a unique life experience and ideally I would want both of them to experience it.
I agree with this too. :lol: Maybe I am too focused on the social aspect - but it is true. College is the time when you form bonds that you may not ever have the chance to make again.
Im the opposite. I have no desire for my children to experience the typical college life. I have watched it change so many of my family and friends, and I dont mean that in a positive way. College doesn't seem the ideal place to go "spouse" hunting. JMO *ducks* Do I want them to get a degree? Well, my college time was a complete waste of time and money in terms of "investment". It was self-enriching yes, but other than that is has done nothing to help me in becoming a good wife and mother, which honestly, is what I hope to see for my own two girls one day. If my girls decide they want to take college courses I will most likely encourage community college or online courses, but at the end of it all they make those decisions and I will support them to the best of my ability. As far as my son goes, I just want to see him get whatever training is neccessary to help him in his chosen career path. I suppose I dont really hold a popular view but there it is!
I would like them to be the best that they can be, and if that involves college, then I'm all for it!
Neither of my adoptive parents, nor my bio-mom, finished high school. Not that they weren't smart enough or anything, it's just that "back in their day" it wasn't a requirement for getting/keeping a job. I am the first to finish high school (except for some older cousins who grew up states away from here), the first to go to college (except for some of those older cousins), and the definite first to get a Master's (MSW). My dd didn't really get a choice - it was sort of ordained from her birth that she would go to college. Actually, she made her best and continuing friends at the giftie residential high school (which only admits 11th and 12th grades), but met her now-husband at college (he didn't finish, she did). She had not a clue what to degree in - so she ended up with English. Not English Education, mind you, just no-job-in-mind liberal arts English. She ended up choosing that because it meant she got to spend a semester matriculating in London, England. DS, on the other hand, seemed destined for a trade of some sort. By the time he was 18, he'd decided on culinary arts, and enrolled at a vocational school for that. He didn't finish, but he's cooked at every kind of food place from fast food to fine dining. I always told him, I didn't care if he was the garbage collector, as long as he was the best doggone garbage collector he could possibly be, and earned an honest living at it - AND as long as it was a choice, not just "settling". If he chose to get a PhD in something, and then chose garbage man as his career, fine! But never "just settle".
I do not want them going to college unless they have a specific path in mind that requires a college degree. Why waste the time and money? If we've learned anything from homeschooling, it's that you don't need a teacher to learn, and you don't need a school to meet people.
I agree that college ruins some people, and that it's not the place to look for a spouse usually. (Not always, of course). I also feel I could clarify my response. I definitely want my boys to go to college. No doubt about it. However, I'm one of those conservative, backward thinkers who think men need to support their families and women need to raise children. If my boys were girls, I'd say college didn't really matter to me as long as they were happy and serving God. As Steve pointed out, though, the earning potential with a degree is much higher, and I'm teaching my boys that it's their job to support the family. I didn't want to finish high school. I wanted to be a SAHM. My parents wouldn't let me quit, and since my options were McDonalds or a college degree on scholarship, I took the scholarship. I now have a useless music degree that I haven't used in years. But hey... at least I can tell the other homeschoolers on the block that I'm a "real teacher" right? (Soooooooo kidding about that comment, if you're new here and haven't seen my sarcasm.) *ducking tomatoes, but not caring that they'll be thrown* :lol:
YES!!! I've been saying for years that Christian kids shouldn't be in college unless they feel personally that his is where God wants them to be! But for it simply to be the "default" thing to do is NOT a good plan!
Beautifully said!! This is my feelings exactly!!!!! (Plus after being told over and over that I should have gone to college, and still being treated like I'm not good enough because I didn't.. I will never tell my kids that I want them to go, but I will stand behind them if that is the road they decide on on their own.)
Well, that wasn't quite what I was talking about. I want my children to experience the academic environment, to take classes and get an alternate opinion, then make up their own mind, to be a part of campus life, to form study groups, take massive exams that stress them out for weeks - get bummed out when they utterly fail - then decide to work harder the next time around and succeed. It teaches a lot of life lessons in 4 years that they may not get in another way. Plus, it offers them time to slip into adulthood and not be thrown to the wolves. In addition, when completing your degree - any degree - you have the freedom to experiment with your intellectual ideas. To write a paper and formulate a theory that you would never have a reason to otherwise, to work in a lab with REAL scientists, to take part in research trials, to watch a large population try to do the same things and see if their choices got them results or not. You also get to meet people at the TOP of their game (professors) and those who will skyrocket to the top of their game very soon (fellow students). In addition, you get to choose which subset of society you want to take part in - do you want to be around all science nerds - all history buffs - all artists? College is where you do this.
Yes and they are going! It's not an option not to go. They need to figure out what they want to do and go to school for it. It doesn’t have to be fancy, just as long as they go or at least try. My youngest will do great, the oldest may struggle but they are both going somewhere. Even if it’s a trade school.
I hear expressed on here an idea I have to "fight" against from time to time. I went to college and graduate school and have a degree in a specialized field. Because I stay at home with my children I often get the "when are you going back to work" or the sentiment that my degree is being wasted. I have to answer with a big NO. College is so much more than a degree. It is not a waste to go to college and stay at home with your children. College expands your thinking. It exposes you to ideas and collaborative work that you might never experience learning independently. I use what I learned in college everyday. The value of education is not defined by a paycheck. If my little girl wants to go to medical school and gets a degree then chooses to stay home with her little ones it is not a waste. You can't take education away. There is no such thing as unnecessary learning.
I agree Embassy College does expand your thinking. I think it is a good experience too. There are so many time that I hear myself say I wish I had gone and finished. I am trying to go back now and it's hard. I don't want that for my kids.
I think it depends on the college and the type of degree. My degree is in music. I learned a lot about music, but most of my time was spent practicing pieces of music (as a group, I mean... things I didn't need to practice individually) that I'll never play again. I already know how to work in groups, so that wasn't an expansion of learning either. To me, that was wasted time. My core classes didn't really matter much to me either. In fact, I don't really remember most of them. The only two things I think I learned in college that I still use today are some things from my science minor and that I was introduced to power point for the first time (which was brand spankin' new back then and didn't have a lot of fancy features... LOL). I agree IN GENERAL that there's nothing wrong with someone getting a degree and then staying home. Nothing at all! My hubby is happy that our kids are doing so well, but I can tell by his manner that he'd really rather I be out doing something to bring in money (since his paycheck is paying for my student loans). I was raised by very poor parents. He was raised by well off parents (who paid his full way to college). He'd prefer that we live in a nice house and spoil our kids rotten. I'm the opposite. I think our house is too big and our kids have way, way, way, WAY too many toys. Very few were bought by me.
::Shrug:: We will just disagree. After watching my brothers go through college I am very thankful that I did not experience any of that. I had one brother who had professors that never showed up. When they did my brother was constantly correcting his errors to the point that he was asked to student teach in the class he was taking. He went through classes that he had to endure constant bashing for not taking part in conversations that belittled Christianity or praised the "tollerance" movement. He attended UTD. My middle brother is quickly sucumbing to peer pressure. He no longer attends church and I believe he is questioning his faith on a very deep level. He has no one there to help guide him through these questions. He has become very involved in the rock and roll culture which with his personality wouldnt suprise me if it lead to alchohol and drug use. He attends San Marcos. My youngest brother just started college and is already picking up a synical attitude. He is attending UTD My cousin went from being a devout Christian to an agnostic verging on athiest. Another UTD student. I cant count the number of friends who have gone to college only to come home pregnant, addicted to something, broken and forever changed by the life choices they made there. None of the ones who attended a secular college attend church any more. Going off to college doesnt just give you an academic education. It is a constant pressure that being a mother or a wife isnt good enough, after all you would be wasting your degree (and while you and I personally may not agree that is what is taught), feminism, tollerance to sin, and the list goes on. I wont be able to stop my children from attending if they want to go and I will do my best to be a good solid support and encouragement to stay grounded but I am sure not going to encourage it! I have spent 10 years and countless hours away from my family completing a degree and I cant even name half the classes I took much less what I was actually taught in them. I can however tell you about every time that I was looked down on for wearing a skirt, or saying that I homeschooled and was a stay at home mom, or saying that I dont believe in evolution. I agree that there is nothing inherently wrong with having a degree. It's the enviroment in which those degrees are earned that concerns me.
ariekannairb, sometimes people just need to do this stuff - they need to question everything. Sometimes they come back - sometimes they take the new path. Yes, college can be a cesspool of ideas that run the entire spectrum - but if someone truly believes something to begin with then they will remain on their path or come back to it eventually.
Would I like Ems to go to college? ABSOLUTELY!!! If she chooses not to attend college, that is her choice.
I went to college, and, yes, I'd like both of mine to go to college. If they choose other paths, though, I'll be OK with that--- as long as the path is an honorable one.
Personally I want my child to go to college, by the time they are college age they'll need a degree just to flip burgers at McD's. College really isn't an option.