It would seem to me there's a lot of "Battles of Satan" happening and I admit that my house is not immune to it. My husband came to Christ as a result of a near death experience (we all did actually) but some years later he no longer has that fire for Christ within him. He has absolutely no interest in church anymore, absolutely no interest in the things of God anymore. It took a moose to get his attention the last time, I can't help but wonder what it will be the next time. I know that he continues to struggle daily with the passing of his mom almost a year ago and I remember a conversation we had about a month ago. I don't remember what prompted me to say "Good boys go to church" but somehow the conversation turned into "I asked God to heal my mother and He took her from me". My heart sunk when he said that. We all prayed for healing and in my eyes, those prayers were answered. She isn't with us now BUT she's in heaven perfectly healthy now, no more cancer, no more diabetes and other things that plagued her health. But my husband lacks the faith to understand that. God answers prayer but not always in the way WE want Him to. His plan is always perfect and His timing couldn't be any better, but he lacks the understanding of it. I continue to attend church on a weekly basis (and will 'drag' myself there even when I'm sick (as I did yesterday) so not to let the devil have 'one up' on me). I do wish I had more time to participate/serve in ministries but my job has me traveling a fair bit which makes getting to those ministries almost impossible right now. I read my Bible in front of him, I read Christian based books and listen to music so it's in his face all the time (I plug my computer into the speakers and turn it up LOL). I used to be able to listen to CD's in the car without him saying much but now it has reached a point where he will reach over and shut it off (I suppose maybe because he's under some conviction - not really sure). I don't want to live in a Christ-less home, I don't want the "ways of the world" to be so dominant but as long as my husband sets this kind of example, I'm really fighting with the boys to live anything different (they won't go to church because his father doesn't go and he doesn't back me up on the need for them to be there). I don't want the only time Jesus' name comes out of mouths to be in a profane sense and right now, that's all I have. God never intended for me to be the head of the house but it's a role I find myself in... it was never a part of His plan and I don't want it but I don't seem to have a lot of choice in the matter. I know that a day is coming when I'm not going to have that choice. I know that my husbands health is not good and I face the reality that in no time, he's going to be 250% dependent on me to meet every single need there is in the house. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it and not worry about it in the meantime. And so I'm asking, if you've made it to the end of this, please be praying for a change of heart for my husband. Pray that he would feel such conviction that he would turn from the world's ways and run back to God.
(((((HUGZ))))) Brenda! I'll pray for your husband's change of heart, and hope that it doesn't take another NDE to get his attention. I'm also going to pray for you to be steadfast and strong in your servant's heart, because it will take that to get you guys through to where he's ready to assume his proper leadership in the home. Remember the part about where the Bible says that the Christian spouse should continue to just live as faithfully as God would have them to, and that the other spouse and the whole family can be won over by the attitude and life of the Christian spouse. When stuff gets you down (how much you have to do, how unresponsive he is, all that), by repeating to yourself "servant's heart" and "do as to the Lord". I'm pulling for you and praying for you, sweetie.
Praying here, too...for all of you to have your own personal revivals. Keep running the race with your eyes fixed on Jesus. It IS being noticed by your dh and boys. You are one strong woman and I'm thanking the Lord for that in you!
Ugh, I typed up something up and it vanished ~ to sum it up. I will be praying for you too. Stay strong in the Lord and know that He is by your side. Your family will see the Lord through you. (((hugs)))
My husband's faith is not near as strong as it once was either. It's hard sometimes I also feel I have to step up as head of household in the area of faith. He isn't resistant to some of it, but to some things he is...we just have to keep praying and keep living like as an example to our children and our husbands. I will be praying for you and for God to soften your husband's heart.
When I reflect where I was even at the beginning of the year and where I am now, I see tremendous growth in myself. I will admit that prior to my son's assault I wasn't as faithful as I should have been. I still went to church and I prayed but I didn't spend the time with God that I should have been spending and it reflected in my life. Maybe it was more of a "going through the motions" without a lot of thought put into it on my part. I look back on the events of this year and know without a doubt in my mind, I'm still standing strong now because God's strength to get me through it all. When the going got rough and I might have otherwise wanted to run, I stood fast and held onto the promise that God's way was the right way. I have no idea how or what He plans to do in order to see my husband and the boys in a loving relationship with Him again but I trust that He knows best and I know that He'll carry me through this as well. Thank you all for praying with me... I really do appreciate it
well I have been the "spiritual leader" of my home and have 2 boys so I guess we have walked in the same shoes some what My DH became a Christian a year ago but still church attendance, tithing and such he is just decades behind me in spiritual growth I raised my boys with Christian teaching and sheltered them the best I could from their fathers secular ideas, programs, and general different life style than my own. I can say marriage and child rearing is very hard when you are this different. When my boys hit puberty I started letting them choose between attending church with me or staying with their father. My oldest stopped attending church around age 17 and pretty much picked up my dh's language, tv shows and most secular views. I pray for him so much and my dh prays for hims and blames himself now My younger son is 14 and loves church and doesn't have the same confusion about God that my oldest is questioning but he may still go through the same thing as he gets older. I attend church with or without my boys and dh. I tell you its the best example and voice for my faith. They are watching me and are disappointed when i don't get up for church. Its funny how they react when I choose to sleep in some Sundays. They are so disappointed in me. They respect me because I don't preach to any of them. I just love them and keep just being a self. I see changes in my all my guys. So just keep praying and walk your Christian walk in humility without preaching to them. They know what you believe they have to come to their own decisions and faith
May I add this that sometimes we place expectations on our husbands because of what we are taught through God's word. But men are falible beings and sometimes the yoke they have is too heavy to bear on their own. So if that means for a few months, years you need to take the spiritual road and instruct your sons to come with you to church then do it. And your hubby is hurting and still grieving. Perhaps in time he will feel Gods love again and understand that God calls home those who are needed and it isn't for us to question why. Take heart you are not alone in your spiritual struggles. After fifteen years of marriage I just finally managed to get my husband this past month to attend church with me. Praise the Lord! Now I hope he will hear the messages offered and take them into his heart. But it isn't my place to push faith onto him. It is for him to come to God on his own. (((hugs)))
