My parents tell me they just threw me in the pool a couple of times and I learned to swim. Now, all these people I see today have their kids in floaties till they are 6 or 7. and they say you don't want to traumatize them or they will never learn. My non swimmers are 2 and 5. I know they can learn, but not sure how to go about it to get them to learn fast.
My mother-in-law has a phobia of water to this day because the YMCA used the old method for reluctant kids--toss them in or hold their heads under water. Traumatizing can/will happen and there just isn't a reason for it. You wouldn't be saving them if an emergency happened, you'd actually be having the previous trauma come to mind and encourage an all out panic attack which will most assuredly end in tragedy. I'd encourage you to spend time in the pool with them and gradually hold on a little less. Keep it feeling fun yet secure. They will gain courage and confidence that way and will be willing to let go and swim on their own. I don't think there is ever a way to rush swimming unless you have a child who is eager to do it independently. Just my thoughts.
Until we moved, the boys didn't really have a place to ride their bikes. As a result, my 9yo still had training wheels. I bought him a bike at Goodwill that didn't, gave it to him, then left him alone with it. He was riding it like a pro before the day was over. I'm realizing that, when they're ready, these sorts of tasks will work themselves out. This has been my battle cry for education, so it's not surprising to find this to be true in life-in-general. Just let them be, expose them to water, and when they're ready, they'll swim. Sure, you can 'teach' them before they're ready, but why?
My kids have always been in water. We did use floaties until we were pretty sure they knew the basics of swimming. My kids aren't afraid of the water and all are able to swim by the time they are 5 or 6. The floaties are not a life saving device. They can be used as a tool to learn to swim. My 5 year old has started to go without floaties as long as my husband or I are in the water. He has been in the water since he was a baby. By the end of summer, he will be swimming above and below water. I wouldn't stress learning fast. We have an above ground pool and the kids are just around water a lot. Exposure to water in a safe environment and learning the rules of water are the most important things. We always designate an adult to be the "lifeguard" and the lifeguard looks for kids who may need to take a rest or such sometimes. Last year in the in-ground pool my ds9 could swim but wasn't used to swimming the length of an in-ground pool where he couldn't touch the bottom if he needed to rest a bit. We had to tell him to take breaks in the shallow end and build up his endurance. Even an adult that can swim can drown. As someone who has a pool and has kids over, sometimes it is necessary to tell a kid that they need a bit more time to swim unassisted.
I learned the old "sink or swim" method too. I don't recall ever being traumatized by it. But that's just me. My kids never had lessons, but they've all loved the water and it kind of came pretty naturally. My oldest was barely 3 the first time he ever shucked off his life jacket and took off across the pool. I didn't even know he COULD swim! He nearly gave me a heart attack! LOL. My other two were about 4 or so when they decided they could swim without assistance. I think they just picked it up by watching the rest of us. Until then,they wore life jackets or we held on to them.
I learned by the old throw her in method. I was 4 and my mom said I had nightmares and would run and hide right before swim lessons. I even hid my suit and they made me go in my underwear. After 10 days of this, I suddenly asked to go swimming and loved the water. I didn't suffer any long term damage, however that isn't a method I would suggest to anyone, and not they way I taught my kids. We have a pool at our house in PA and spent the last two summers in the water more than out. My kids were 1, 2 & 5 when we got the pool. We used arm floaties and rings when we were just hanging out in the pool. We just let the kids lead and get used to being in the water. We did take them under with us a few times so they could see that it wasn't a big deal. We also took the floaties off and worked a little each day with them one on one. Pretty soon they were getting around the pool pretty well, with just arm floaties. Once they were really comfortable, we used a really simple trick...every couple of days, we put a little less air in the arm floaties. It took a little more effort to hold themselves up, but they didn't really notice, and we were always right there with them. By the end of the summer they were using them almost completely deflated and it was an easy transition to no floaties. Once my daughter could swim (she was 6 by this time) I wanted her to learn to jump in the pool. She wouldn't do it. She would stand at the edge and count and then back away. After three days of this, I did pick her up lower her close to the edge and let her go. I knew she could swim...she was just afraid of the unknown. Once she saw it wasn't a big deal, she spent most of her days jumping in and swimming to the ladder to get out and do it again.
Rachael took "lessons" right after her first birthday. No, I don't believe in "throwing them in and holding their head under", but I also don't believe at floaties indefinately. She was in a class with older (3 and 4 yo's) kids, and she would just jump right in because SHE HADN'T LEARNED TO BE AFRAID. It's a riot to see a toddler sitting on the end of the pool and jumping right off! When we had a Y membership, the kids weren't allowed to have floaties in the deep end. They would sit on the side of the deep end while I had them jump in the water and "swim" out to me. OpenMinded is right in that floaties can be used to help teach. But they can also be dangerous (which is why the Y didn't allow them in the deep end!). It should go without saying that you can't put a kid in one, and then walk off and expect him to be safe. Faythe flipped over in one once, and the floatie didn't allow her to right herself!
The best thing you can do is just be in the water with them. Hold them while they float. Have them float on their backs with your arms under them. After a while, slowly lower your arms. Let them get their faces in the water and if they want to swim, they will surprise you and take off like fish! Floaties give them and you a false sense of security, but can be a great way to get them used to the water. Our kids have been in the water since they were 6 months old! We never did the "sink or swim" thing, it just sort of happened! Good luck and have fun in the water.....
I was a "sink or swim" child. I chose sink. Seriously I remember sitting under the water waiting for someone to rescue me. I was terrified of water for the longest time. Finally had no choice but to learn in 8th grade because swimming was a required course, though they had a non-swim class so that's what I took. Anyway, I ramble, sorry. My own children used progressively less floaties until they were 6 or 7. Last summer was the first summer they used no floaties at all, and the year before that it was only the arm floats. My three year old has this for this year, and probably at least part of next year. I go on the theory that it's best to go at their pace. My oldest two were in Pennsylvania for their first 3 years and so did not have a swimming pool that was readily available. It only took a couple years for them to be fully comfortable in the water, and once they did, the floaties began to shed and they basically self taught.
I have a friend who tried the "sink or swim" on their son and he ended up being so untrusting that he wouldn't get anywhere close to water with someone around (especially his dad who is the one who threw him in). He eventually got over it after they paid for private swimming lessons. My oldest daughter started swimming around age 3. She's always loved water, and one day took her floatie off and it was history. Once they've got it, it sticks. She is exposed to water A LOT. Now she has progressed to jumping in, swimming underwater, doing the breast stroke (as well as "doggy paddling" since that is what she learned first), and is now trying to learn to dive. I'm confident my younger daughter will learn when she's ready... but she's not as much of a "water bug" like her sister.
Mine did not take lessons but they all swim like fish. My sister lives across the street from us and built a pool 16 years ago. She says every kid has a summer sitting on the steps playing and by the end of the summer or the beginning of the next summer they are swimming. We don't do anything to force them into the pool or away from the steps. They just venture on in when they want to. I would never toss a child into the pool. That would have scared me to death when I was little. My mother was afraid of water after a near drowning when she was 13 so she had all of us learn to swim at the YMCA.
Are you all seriously saying kids can learn to swim on their own???? I cannot swim, and I always thought people had to take lessons to learn. Right now I am paying for my 3 boys to take swimming lessons at one of the city pools, where they spend a measly 30 mins in the water with 6 other kids and learn next to nothing, in my opinion. I have never heard of the sink or swim method and always thought that while other species can swim instinctively, it is not so for human children. How do they learn the techniques for breast stroke etc? Or do they swim "freestyle" and these methods needs to be refined? PS: Yes, I probably did live under a rock!
MomToMusketeers, My oldest two boys learned to swim (not beautifully, or in fancy strokes), but they can keep themselves afloat, and avoid drowning in a pool. They jump in and swim to the surface, and they splash and play. So yes, they can learn to swim on their own, but proper technique of course needs to be taught. However, just like homeschooling a child will learn when they are ready.
This is a common complaint in regard to swim lessons. Personally, I'd prefer mine to take lessons AFTER they've learned to swim on their own so they only need to learn more skills/techniques if that's something they're interested in pursuing.
My dad used to tell this really old joke. Two kids are talking. One says, "My dad's so great! He teaches me all kinds of things, like how to hunt, and fish, and drive a car." The other kid says, "My dad's great too! He taught me how to swim. ... Wasn't too bad after I got out of that sack!"
I think the big thing is exposure. The problem with "sink or swim" is that it is (often, not always) done in what appears to the child as an non-secure. And taking away a child's sense of safety, especially at a very young age, isn't a wise idea. "Exposing them to water" (as Julz said), doesn't do that. Whether you use floaties or are just "with" them (Silman and myself), the security is still there. And the security is what builds the confidence to where they have a greater opportunity to "just take off". (Phillip, btw, was going off the high dive when he was 5 or 6! It "forced my more-cautious Rachael off, because if her LITTLE brother could do it, she had to, too, lol!!!)
Bill, our mentally handicapped son, taught our son Bobby how to swim. He was so proud to be able to do that. Bill swims like a fish and dives great. Bobby just wanted to learn so badly he followed Bill's advice and at 7 was swimming in no time. (For those who might know our family history this might be confusing. Bobby lived with us in foster care years before he came back to us to be adopted.)
I agree with another post, let them learn the basics of holding their breaths, dog paddling, being comfortable in the water, THEN do swim lessons for technique! When a child first goes under, their instinct will be to hold their breath and try to get above water. Just be there with them, ready to grab when they need help! But let them do it on their own, don't just throw them in and hope for the best.
Because we had a pool, our first priority was teaching the kids to swim so that they would be safe. (We had a fence with a locked gate, but still we felt the best safeguard was teaching them to swim.) We weren't concerned with strokes or breathing or blowing bubbles...We wanted them to be able to swim to the side if they ever found themselves in the water. Now that they have that down, they are signed up for swim lessons this summer. We moved this past fall and no longer have a pool, so I had to sign them up at the community pool.
