This is what we starting doing again today. The boys attitudes have been extremely poor lately. Luke (5.5) is giving me defiance and disrespect and Josh (3.5) is whining and crying about everything. We got out of the habit of earning beans during the chaos of the move. Now we have chore charts for for 10 cents a chore and the beans are for good attitude, manners, & immediate obedience. I cheated a little because we were already planning a surprise trip to the indoor waterpark next week so I filled it a little past the 6 (I think they were on 4 before the move). They know when we get to 7 its "WATER PLAYLAND!" So today we have a complete transformation from the "ugly" boys I had yesterday to handsome, obedient, well mannered children (ok except for that bit when they were running around the grocery store playing "dodge 'em" - some game they made up). "Ugly" and "handsome" are terms for attitude. I'm trying to teach them that a bad attitude is unattractive, but a good attitude makes people want to be around you and always looks better. Just thought I'd share whats working for us (this week)
Glad you found something that is working! I on the other hand, told my youngest today that she needed to grow up and start helping more and taking more responsibility.. just to have my husband come home and tell her she did not have to She is 11 almost 12... I have been having trouble getting her to do anything... even getting up in the morning... I think Daddy is going to have to let his little girl (baby of the family) do some growing up and wash the dishes on her nights and pull her weight! (sorry to take over your thread)
I'm not sure when you moved but you have to take in account that any move can take its toll on everyone, with an adjustment period...... and the kids may have needed to know to expect the same discipline & reward sytems as they did in the "old place". ...... a "test mom" stage I guess. and my daughter just turned 12 and ........... I think its just a stage...... I hope. but I think reward systems probably work with any age.......
Yes, the move and the fact that we now live in their grandparents house, where they get away with murder, coupled with the fact that their grandparents were in town last week...it just all came to a head. The grandparents live in florida now and are only here 3 times a year for two weeks at most each visit. However, it def affects their behavior. I lost all consistency over the summer as May & June was spent getting our old house prepped and staged for sale, June & July was spent living in our camper and Aug & Sept was spent moving our stuff into the new house and the stuff of theirs I didn't want out...Its finally over and we can get back to a semi normal routine.
