We live in a very rural area. I only know of one other family that homeschools here. Most people just see homeschooling as a weird thing. They think you are depriving your child of an education, doing them an injustice, etc. Even my own mother and sister think I'm doing the wrong thing. They keep telling me my child needs to be around other children more often. I'm feeling very alone in this and completely inadequate to do it. I do not have a teaching background and my son seems to have more days where he wants to avoid doing 'school' than days where he enjoys it. What am I doing wrong? Is this the wrong path for us to take? I feel very strongly that homeschool is the best option for my child but what is going to happen if I screw up his education? Thanks for letting me vent!
First, IMO, you have to really force yourself to screw up your kid, lol. How old is he? Maybe he is just needing a different approach to learning. Give us a little more info...what are you using, etc?
Vent away! That's what we're here for. You know your kid the best, of course, but I think with certain personality types, once something becomes obligatory, the kid resists it. At least that's what I've experienced with my daughter. She seems to enjoy class while we're doing it (not every minute, of course -- in fact, we're struggling today!), but resists the "idea" of class. I'm convinced it's only because she "has" to do it. If I told her that it was something she only got to do on special occasions if she was really, really well behaved, she'd probably want to do it every hour of the day. On the subject of family approval......it's tough not to be supported by your mom and sister. I understand -- mine think I'm warping my daughter (also an only child -- assuming that's your situation - ?) and somehow raising the Unabomber due to her perceived "extreme isolation". They are just very comfortable with what's familiar, and homeschooling is an unknown to them, therefore they assume that it must be the wrong path to take. But you know your son the best. If you feel this is the right path for him, trust yourself and go for it! Most of us on this board aren't trained as teachers either -- if you have the love, belief in yourself, and commitment to pursue this, you can do it!!! Have you given thought to how you're teaching him, and how that compares to how he learns best? If he's not a "book learner", perhaps a style that's heavily focused on worksheets won't appeal to him. Or perhaps he works best when he's given an opportunity to be creative, and the approach has too much structure. Other kids (like mine) work best within structure. Perhaps that's playing into why he's resisting school? Best of luck to you on this journey! You have many listening ears here anytime you need it.
And teachers spend most of their time in college learning classroom management. And the don't (aren't allowed) to teach for true learning and knowledge, they teach to the almighty test, which doesn't measure true knowledge. I made decent grades in school and retained very little of what I 'taught' but what I've learned on my own since...I remember that stuff. You may screw your kid up, but honestly, homeschooling is probably not the way to do it. Lots of people screw their kids up and don't homeschool. Public school screws plenty of kids up. If you feel this is the right choice for your family, it doesn't matter what your mom or sister or aunt Betty or the walmart cashier or your neighbors think. This is not their child. It is yours. If you and your husband agree on homeschooling, block the rest out. Simply tell them, this is your choice, not theirs and you'll listen to no more negitive comments about it. And, I mean really, the US tests horribly in international scores, so can you really screw up his education any worse that the government could? How many kids graduate that can't read? Can't write? Can't do simple math? If they even graduate at all! Let go of those negative thoughts! Why are you homeschooling? What are your goals for your child's education? Moral development? Your family? Write them down! Print them out and post them where you can see them! Daily! We all hit patches where we doubt ourselves and our choice. We all have bad days, weeks or months. We all have our own struggles. Knowing your goal and why you're doing this will help you make it through the rough patches. It also helps me decide "Is this battle worth fighting? Does it get me to my goal? If not, why am causing me and my children stress fighting this battle?" For an example here is our goals that I have posted on our classroom wall Homeschool Mission Statment by SonitaLewis, on Flickr For support have you checked out Yahoo groups? All of my local homeschool groups have a yahoo group. You may just have to get most of your support online. I know it's not the same, but I know I'd have never made it without this forum! Many times it's more helpful than my local groups....
Even though our parents lived on the other side of an ocean, they were still dubious about our homeschooling. We overcame it in part by inviting them, when visiting, to teach certain subjects. Of course, we took them with us on plenty of field trips to local landmarks, which also went down well. Also, we had our older daughter speak with them at length about family history, about growing up in poverty after WW-II, about the river on which the region depended, and so on. Looking back, I wish I'd asked her to write a biography for each of her grandparents and present it to them. It's valuable information that can easily be lost, and it's something that would never be done in the public school system.
Thank you all for the support. I'm feeling somewhat better today about everything. My husband and I are very much on board with each other on homeschooling. We both believe it is the best option for our child and are committed to doing this. I just have those days sometimes when I feel so completely over my head! Our boy is very good with math....seems to get those concepts much quicker than I ever did. And he loves science experiments. He hates reading and writing. He is in first grade so I am somewhat reluctant to do much of his education on the computer but I just purchased Click N Read, the Looney Tunes version. He asks me several times a day to get on the computer to do it. Which is awesome. He never asks to work on phonics with his books! So I'm excited about this option. Should I consider looking for all his curriculum in a computer format? Also, can anyone recommend a science curriculum for first grade? I have almost no scienc background so I am really out of my element there! Thank you all so much!
We love Apologia for elementary science. Full curriculum. The Jr notebooking journals are nice to have too. We supplement with Master Books science http://www.newleafpublishinggroup.com/product_info.php?products_id=917-these are quick reads, not too much hands on, no worksheets or writing. Quick read, Christian based. But both my kids LOVE science so we do a lot of extra science.
Sweetie, I teach Other People's Kids, and have for 13 years now. Most of them have come from public school. Their grades in ps are A's, B's, and C's, mostly. Unless they're mostly D's amd F's, but I'm not talking about those kids right now. I'm talking about the ones who LOOK like they're doing okay, but their parents just FEEL they could be doing better.\ Right now I have a 9th grade girl who's a whiz at English, but thinks only in concrete terms - is just not getting the "abstractness" of 9th grade literature (like symbolism, deeper meanings, etc.). When she came to me last year for 8th grade, I had to put her in my fourth grade math. She's now doing a 7th grade book (so the book cover says). We'll probably do summer school. I have a 9th grade boy who came just this year. He "passed" 8th grade, even passing the 8th grade state test. He's struggling with my fifth grade reader, and is completing my fourth grade math. PS, in its infinite wisdom, decided that since he had done first grade with them twice, now deserved a chance to "be in his right grade" so they had him go from 6th grade to 8th grade, skipping over the 7th grade altogether! Yeah, that helped a lot, didn't it? We tried Apologia's 7th grade General Science, but even with the Student Notebook and explanations until I was blue in the face, he just could NOT grasp it. So we have switched to some fifth grade Lifepacs I had lying around, and it's barely - with tons of explanation - a little better (scores in the lower 80s). His 8th grade sister came with him this year, and she's doing a little better. She is in a 5th grade English, with him, and she's getting it a bit better grades than he's getting. She's in a different 5th grade reader and doing okay. She's in a 6th grade math (according to the book cover). Next year I'm planning on having them both in a 6th grade English and reading together. We have been doing a remedial phonics course this year, with timed reading lists. All 3 of them. The girls have improved reading accuracy and speed, him not so much. Next year maybe Sequential Spelling? The siblings have also been doing Abeka's Read and Think worksheets (where they're given a brief reading passage with 10 questions to answer in a given time period, decreasing from 5 to 4.5 to 4.0 minutes). I doubt very seriously that your student could come out worse off educationally than these public-school kids who were considered as "average" students there. BTW, none of these kids were considered anything but average students, although I'm convinced (by 20 years in the public school system) that all 3 should have been identified as dyslexic.
If it helps any, I live in Southern California and there are millions of people throughout. Homeschooling is also big out here. Still, there are people who think I am isolating my child and people who believe I will mess her up. It doesn't matter where you live. You are the parent, you make the choices. Feel proud that you have courage to do what others find intimidating. You are a powerful momma!
Oh hun, you are doing what other mothers would love to do for their kids! Really, you are controlling what they learn and the pace they learn it. The education system is changing. With the Common Core Standards in place, classroom teachers are being forced to suck the creativity out of the classroom for fear of their jobs. As a homeschool parent, you can create an environment that fosters creativity and innovation. It is disheartening what is going on in classrooms and I predict more and more parents will homeschool their kiddos as we are.
