My hobby is writing funny parody songs. With Mothers Day coming soon, here is a song honoring those hard working homeschooling moms. Sing it to the tune of I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General from The Pirates of Penzance. I Am The Very Model Of Our Modern Homeschool Motherhood I am the very model of our modern homeschool motherhood; I've information spiritual, temporal, and all that's good. I know the great plays of the Bard, and I quote the verses theatrical, From Henry Six to The Tempest, in order categorical. I'm very well acquainted too with matters mathematical; I understand equations both the simple and quadratical. About a woman's pregnancy, I'm teaming with a lot to say, With many cheerful fact about the reasons that she got that way. Chorus: With many cheerful fact about the reasons that she got that way. With many cheerful fact about the reasons that she got that way. With many cheerful fact about the reasons that she got, she got that way. I'm very good at French cuisine. I know my child psychology, And I can teach you violin in a quartet or symphony. In short in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, I am the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood. Chorus: In short in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, She is the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood. I know colonial history, John Adams and George Washington. I teach a Constitution classs while playing the accordion. I clean my home, and wash laundry while memorizing Heb'rew. I garden, do aerobics, meet my husband for a rendezvous. I read my children stories for the Gospels or from Genesis. I take them on a field trip by the first of every month no less. I sew my own desginer clothes. My kitchen is immaculate. When in-laws come to visit, I serve crepe souffle de halibut! Chorus: When in-laws come to visit, she'll serve crepe souffle de halibut! When in-laws come to visit, she'll serve crepe souffle de halibut! When in-laws come to visit, she'll serve crepe souffle de hali-, halibut! I teach a unit study course on each and every holiday; I've organized my day so I can read the scriptures, think, and pray. In short in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, I am the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood. Chorus: In short in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, She is the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood. In fact when I know what is meant by "erudite" and "explicate," When I can tell the difference 'tween "diagram" and "conjugate," When such pursuits as bickering or self doubting I'm wary of, And when I nurture my children by teaching them of God's great love. When my kids trash the living room, I exercise my self-control, And I know twenty different ways to transfigure a casserole. In short when I have lived a life of homeschooling philosophy, You'll say a better modern homeschool mom has never bettered me! Chorus: You'll say a better modern homeschool mom has never bettered she! You'll say a better modern homeschool mom has never bettered she! You'll say a better modern homeschool mom has never better, bettered she! For my matriarchal knowledge, tho' I'm humbly unpretentious, And tho' there's much I lack of yet in reaching total genius-ness, But still in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, I am the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood. Chorus: In short in matters spiritual, temporal and all that's good, She is the very model of our modern homeshool motherhood.
This is fantastic! Thank you for sharing it. And now I'm going to have this tune in my head all night. lol
Now you just need someone to sing it in a youtube video. Have you seen the video, "I will survive (homeschooling)"?
You borrowed just a little bit from Gilbert and oh Sullivan But that's OK 'cuz the odd quote is relevant and optimum In short, I found your lines of verse quite clever and so very good You are the very model of a modern homeschool motherhood. Now as for me I emanate from Cornwall that's so far away With ancestors born in Penzance and Truro and in old Newquay With eyepatch and a rusty sword, a veritable Robin Hood I am the very model of a modern pirate fatherhood.
No, please, no! You know, I always wanted to play the part of the major general - but it's really quite tough to get all those words out so quickly. Since Penzance is in Cornwall, local groups used to perform it all the time. It was always a blast to see how quickly the MG could spit out his words (see the last 60 seconds of this video, for example). But please, no parasol like that!
This song is more obscure than most, but it is incredibly fun. The original is Gilbert and Sullivan's My Eyes Are Fully Open from Ruddigore. I wrote the revised song for Mother's Day a few years ago. MOM, MY EYES ARE FULLY OPEN HUSBAND My eyes are fully open to my grateful situation -- I shall go at once to my dear wife and make her my oration, I shall tell her I've discovered her outstanding common senses, And I'm grateful that I benefit from any consequences. Now I do not want to be accused of acting like a braggart, But a husband may indulge a little pardonable swagger, In a word or two of compliment, I'll tell her that I love her, Plus I've got to say to her that she's a super-duper mother! CHORUS She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- She's a super-duper mother! She's a super-duper mother,mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother! CHILD 1 If I were not a little mad and generally silly; I should give you my advice upon a subject willy nilly I should show you in a moment how to grapple with the question, And you'd really be astonished at the force of my suggestion. On the subject I shall tell you a most honorable lady, Full of excellent suggestions and she makes the cutest babies! Yet at present I'm afraid I am as mad as any other, So I'll keep her to myself, for she's a super-duper mother! CHORUS She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- She's a super-duper mother! She's a super-duper mother,mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother! CHILD 2 Well I have been so lucky as to have a splendid mother, Who can talk to me as we are talking now to one another, Who can give me good advice when she discovers I am erring, (Which is just the very favour which on you I am conferring). Her existence sure has made a rather interesting story, And it's clear to all her family we think she is hunky dory. This particularly rapid, unintelligible blubber, Isn't generally heard, about my super-duper mother! CHORUS She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- She's a super-duper mother, mother, mother, mother, mother -- This particularly rapid, unintelligible blubber, Isn't generally heard, about my super-duper mother! This particularly rapid, unintelligible blubber, Isn't generally heard, about my super-duper mother, mother,mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, mother!
OK - your posts have become a challenge! The following is sung to "the first lord's song" from G&S's HMS Pinafore. When I was a dad, I planned the term, My children during class how they did squirm. I taught them English, though they were dismayed, And we went on many field trips to improve their grades. They went on many field trips to improve their grades. We went on many field trips so int'resting And now I am a veteran of homeschooling. They went on many field trips so int'resting And now he is a veteran of homeschooling. When I was a dad, I taught them well, My children did their work and learned to spell. I taught them hist'ry, and I taught them math, And we played a lot of games designed to make them laugh. They played a lot of games designed to make them laugh. We played a lot of games so enlightening And now I am a veteran of homeschooling. They played a lot of games so enlightening And now he is a veteran of homeschooling. When I was a dad, I watched them learn, And I was very proud they could discern. They learned what is good, and they learned what's bad And their attitude in gen'ral surely made me glad. Their attitude in gen'ral surely made him glad. Their attitude in gen'ral was hardworking And now I am a veteran of homeschooling. Their attitude in gen'ral was hardworking And now he is a veteran of homeschooling. My children have grown, and I've watched them leave, And I was soon to learn what they'd achieve. The oldest is a doctor who makes sick ones well And the next, who is a nurse, endeavors to excel. The next, who is a nurse, endeavors to excel. The next, who is a nurse, is flourishing, And one day, maybe, he too will be homeschooling. The next, who is a nurse, is flourishing, And one day, maybe, he too will be homeschooling.
BTW, I love the humor of Gilbert & Sullivan. Aren't these words, from "the first lord's song," still so true of politicians? I grew so rich that I was sent By a pocket borough into Parliament I always voted at my party's call And I never thought of thinking for myself at all No, he never thought of thinking for himself at all I thought so little, they rewarded me By making me the Ruler of the Queen's Navy He thought so little, they rewarded he By making him the Ruler of the Queen's Navy John Kerry, anyone?
It's a G&S parody songfest! OUR DEAR MOMMY'S LOT IS NOT AN EASY ONE Sing to the tune of "The Policeman's Song" from Gilbert & Sullivan's "Pirates of Penzance" CHILDREN: When a mother's not engaged in her employment (her employment) Or maturing her matriarchal little plans (little plans) Her capacity for innocent enjoyment (-cent enjoyment) Is just as great as any harried mom's (harried mom's) Our feelings we with difficulty smother (-culty smother) When matriarchal duty's to be done (to be done) Ah, take one consideration with another (with another) Our dear mommy's lot is not an easy one. Ahhh When matriarchal duty's to be done, to be done, Our dear mommy's lot is not an easy one. When the juvenile pubescent's not in torment (not in torment) When the rug rat isn't covered all in grime (all in grime) She's bound to cry aloud that all her nerves spent (all her nerves spent) And mutter that she finally past past her prime (past her prime) When the moppet's finished jumping on his mother (on his mother) She hates to find some leakage from his bum (from his bum) Ah, take one consideration with another (with another) Our dear mommy's lot is not an easy one. Ahhh When matriarchal duty's to be done, to be done, Our dear mommy's lot is not an easy one.
From 'The Mikado': Three little homeschooled kids are we, Clever as homeschooled kids can be, Striving to learn creatively, Three little kids homeschooled. Learning from mom life's precious joys, Learning from dad how to play with toys, Learning to one day be employed, Three little kids homeschooled. Three little kids with aspirations, Parents who are their inspiration, Oh, how they've earned our admiration, Three little kids homeschooled. Three little kids homeschooled. One little kid is an engineer, Two little kids just love Shakespeare, Three little kids who make it clear They're three little kids homeschooled. Three little kids who love to learn, Truth from error can discern, Socialization? No concern! Three little kids homeschooled. Three little kids with aspirations, Parents who are their inspiration, Oh, how they've earned our admiration, Three little kids homeschooled. Three little kids homeschooled. Your turn.
The Homeschool Dad THE HOMESCHOOL DAD To the tune of The Pirate King from The Pirates of Penzance DAD Oh, better far to live and die Under the homeschool flag I fly, And play a sanctimonious part, With a homeschool head and a homeschool heart. Away from the public schools go we, Where liberals all are formed-to-be; And I’ll be true to this song my lads, And live and diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiie a Homeschool Dad. Foooooooor I am a Homeschool Dad! And it is, it is a glorious fad To be a Homeschool Dad! For I am a Homeschool Dad! KID CHORUS You are! Hurrah for our Homeschool Dad! DAD And it is, it is a glorious fad To be a Homeschool Dad. KID CHORUS It is! Hurrah for our Homeschool Dad! DAD and KID CHORUS Hurrah for the/our Homeschoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool Dad! KID CHORUS He is our Homeschool Dad! He is! Hurrah for the Homeschool Dad! And it is, it is a glorious fad To be a Homeschool Dad! It is! Hurrah for the Homeschool Dad! Hurrah for the Homeschool Dad! DAD When I sally forth to start my day I help my wife in a bossy way. I read a few more books, it’s true, Than a sports-bred husband ought to do; But many dad with a right wing view, If he wants the same for home and crew, Must manage somehow to get through More homeschool work than ever I do, Foooooooooor I am a Homeschool Dad! And it is, it is a glorious fad To be a Homeschool Dad! For I am a Homeschool Dad! KID CHORUS You are! Hurrah for the Homeschool Dad! DAD And it is, it is a glorious fad To be a Homeschool Dad. KID CHORUS It is! Hurrah for our Homeschool Dad! DAD and KID CHORUS Hurrah for the/our Homeschooooooooooooooooooooooooooool Dad!
In response to your somewhat political rhyme, a pragmatic riposte - sung to the Paradox from the "Pirates of Penzance". When we considered what is best For all the children in our house, I soon discovered I am blessed With a sagacious spouse. She said, "The public school is fine, And private school's an option too, With homeschooling our kids may shine. What is your point of view?" "Try homeschooling, yes homeschooling. It's hard, it's tough, it's grueling, But to our children we can bring Integrity through homeschooling." We're not left-wing, we're not right wing, But we confess to homeschooling. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. To homeschooling. Our oldest went to public school Until eleven she did turn. But homeschooling became the rule, And she just loved to learn! Then she progressed to private school. And learned all things American. Her grades were high: She was no fool! Valedictorian. The education we preferred Was not "one size fits all" for her - Or for the second or the third. And flexibility's our word. We're not left-wing, we're not right wing, But we confess to homeschooling. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. To homeschooling.
AHHHHHH someone sing these on youtube and share the links... I can't focus long enough to read it all this morning! I think I need more coffee... much more coffee!
I've got a little list — I've got a little list. (The Mikado) But in the interest of quality over speed, I invite everyone's participation in filling in the list. What are some of the things people did that bothered you and caused you to switch to homeschooling? The more comments, the more material there is to work with. I will see which ones I can work into the song. You may put 'em on the list — you may put 'em on the list; And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll none of 'em be missed!
