I don't think you have to have lots in common to "click" I think you just both need have respect for the other and their right to live their life they way they see best. My best friends are NOTHING like me. My best friend is 35 years older than me, married, non-practicing Christian, no children by choice. My next best friend is 25, pan-sexual, agnostic, very involved in LGBT rights. We OBVIOUSLY disagree on most political/religious issues. But we discuss them with respect for each other. We are comfortable telling the other what we believe and why. But we know the other isn't going to be rude and disrespectful, even if we disagree. My 3rd best friend is my cousin who is 4 years younger than me. My parents raised her until she was 13. We stayed close for years. She had a SN child (cerebral palsy) at 14, I took her and him to therapy 2 days a week for years. She was a SAHM. We talked all the time. Then, a few years ago she 'went wild' and cheated on her husband, left him, got hooked on heroin, jailed for shoplifting, etc...She quit talking to me when she started cheating on her husband. She knew we were close enough and I'm blunt enough that I'd tell her like it was and wouldn't condone it. She started calling me again about 9 months after she got clean and was back living with her husband. She has since left him and is engaged to another man she has a baby with. Together they have 4 kids, we were talking regularly when she was a SAHM but since she got a job and has 4 kids (1 SN, 2 playing baseball plus a toddler) she doesn't have a lot of free time and I try not infringe on her family time. We talk a couple times a month now. My friends are nothing like me really. But we've been friends forEVER. And we have respect for one another. And the sad thing to me is, the lack of respect people in our culture have for one another that makes so many of us feel so isolated! Just because you don't breastfeed, use cloth diapers, homeschool, aren't Christian and conservative and into natural remedies, doesn't mean I can't be friends with you. But it's so hard to find people that have enough respect for others to accept your different views and opinions as not a threat to their own views and opinions...sad...
Yes!!! This is so true! I give everyone a chance, even the ones I think I have nothing in common with.
Me, too. I think if God puts a person in our path, there is a purpose for it. A couple of times, I've asked "Why me, God?" in the early stages of getting to know someone, but ended up being good friends. I would like one close friend, with whom I share quite a bit in common. I do have those, but not locally.
We try to give everyone a chance... it's just hard to click with someone who thinks you are crazy for homeschooling or you are crazy because your idea of a good time is hanging out with your kids at the park instead of leaving them with a sitter and hitting the bar.
Hubby and I don't have any friends either. If I need to go somewhere and hang out awhile, then I go visit my Mum and Dad. DH doesn't go anywhere because he doesn't have friends or family (that aren't crazier than loons and full of drama). We are so different from other people. I see folks on my facebook newsfeed out visiting friends, going places, and so on and ...honestly...we just don't have money for that. We are lucky if we get all the bills paid, honestly. I've had a couple people say, "We should meet here and do this!" and I say, "Oh, maybe, but I just gotta do this other thing...sorry." Hey, it's easier than explaining that I don't have any money, I never WILL have any money, and if I want some money for a project I have to sell off my belongings to get it. It's too weird with people now. We homeschool, are on only one income, have a disabled child, we're "breeders" as some have put it, and just generally have NOTHING in common with others. I'm done crying over it now. It took some adjustments because I used to be SOOO social, and NEED the social interaction (having our first boy was difficult because my "friends" stayed away and I never saw anyone), but now...I just dont' have time for everyone's drama! I wish I could find a good friend. I am trying to reconnect with an old friend from Middle school but she lives in the next state so...it's difficult.
Freddy is my best friend and then my sister. One of my older daughters lives close to me so she and I do a lot together with my youngest daughter. I have few close friends and actually prefer it that way. My family is really enough for me. I have never had a huge group of friends even as a kid.
I have never had a lot of close friends, usually just one or two. It was hard to loose my last close friend. With hubby's injury, our whole world turned upsidedown. My attention and time was focused so much on hubby that I neglected the friendship. He is my best friend and I'm blessed to have him. I just sometimes miss having another woman to talk to when I'm surrounded by men!
