Need a confidence boost

Discussion in 'Homeschooling' started by Minthia, Nov 10, 2013.

  1. mommix3

    mommix3 Active Member

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    I was in public school all the way through (with the exception of a semester in high school when I had scarlett fever) and I still have issues socially.. I'm just happier being by myself and when I'm with others I feel totally out of my element.. Especially strangers.. So going to public school doesn't guarantee a social butterfly.. I have 3 kids who have re-entered the public school system recently after being homeschooled for over 6 years and they are fine.. My youngest has NEVER been to school and won't go until she's in 7th grade and she does just fine socially. Makes friends where ever she goes and is very polite.. Not a savage kid who treats others rudly with no reguards to their feelings. She does have moments of cluelessness on current issues like tv shows and music because we do watch their intake of those things closely.. But I don't see that as a social problem at all.. Just because I choose to keep my child from being "in" the world so much doesn't mean they are deprived of social interaction.. BTW we joined a co-op a few years ago and my 3 older kids hated it.. We only went for a few months. My youngest loved it though.. You are doing fine.. I wouldn't send your kids to school for social reasons especially with all the issues you are having in your community.. I was hoping that had all passed, but apparently not.. I am so sorry you are having to deal with that.. In all honesty, I think it would be a hostile environment and THAT could lead to long term effects..

    P.S. There's plenty of room for you all to move here to Texas if you are still considering a move... :) ((hugs))
     
  2. Minthia

    Minthia Active Member

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    momix3- we are still considering a move but unless someone wants to hand us a lot of money it isnt going to happen soon. Moving here destroyed our credit and put us in serious debt. :(

    We could sell our house and use the equity to pay off our debt but our credit would still be so bad we couldnt buy another house and we hate renting....though we have considered it.

    Btw, Texas is on our list of possibile places to move. :)
     
  3. lovetoteach

    lovetoteach New Member

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    Reading these gives me perspective on some of my own doubts and naggings. This clears it up nicely
     
  4. farouk

    farouk New Member

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    Hi; rites of passage aren't absent in my view; just different. For example, there is ear piercing and the trip to the tattoo parlor at 18, which for some young people is almost 'obligatory', etc.
     
  5. JosieB

    JosieB Active Member

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    But babies get their eras pierced, and not everyone has tattoos, I'm 36 and I don't have a tattoo.

    There are still cultures that do have a rite of passage, but typical American culture does not.

    Our culture used to recognize certain rites of passage:
    Bar/Bat Mitzvah
    weddings (but not in America because cohabitation is so common)
    cotillion balls and beautillion balls
    Graduation
    Puberty

    But today, typical rites of passage mean nothing. Graduation (from high school or college) doesn't make young adults in our society step up and grow up, it just means more time to party! Too many kids today can't hold down a job, move back in with mom and dad (not due to the economy, but due to irresponsible behavior and lack of ability to grow up) Debutante balls are just another big party. Puberty just means you need to use protection when having your premarital sex.

    Wanting to do something "grown up" and accepting responsibility of an adulthood are two different things. Today's kids have cell phones, wear make up, black/red clothing, watch R rated movies, etc at 8 or 9 they don't have to wait until they are older for anything!
     
  6. farouk

    farouk New Member

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    Depends on exactly what is meant by rite of passage, I guess. It varies.

    Re. tattoos, it's certainly not for everyone. Just that at 18, a lot do it for the first time.

    Re. puberty etc., I wouldn't think that being in a situation to need condoms at puberty is remotely ideal, but maybe you didn't mean this anyway.

    Take care.
     
  7. farouk

    farouk New Member

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    PS:

    I reckon quite a few of your friends do, whether you realize it or not... :)
     
  8. JaniceEckenroth

    JaniceEckenroth New Member

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    "*sigh* I just get worried at times that I might ruin my kids."

    The mere fact that you even worry about ruining your kids proves that you never will. They will grow up knowing that you have - all along - had their very best interests in mind and have spent much time and effort in securing them the very best possible education in a protected and loving environment. I would say that so far you are doing an amazing job. Social opportunities will arise with time, have faith. :)

    Janice
    Mom of 4
     
  9. JaniceEckenroth

    JaniceEckenroth New Member

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    Also, taken from an article on homeschool and socialization @ homeschoolinghelp.com:

    "In fact, the diversity of their experiences and their more frequent interaction with adults is responsible for homeschoolers scoring higher on maturity tests, exhibiting fewer behavioral problems, superior social skills and performing better in their academics."


    Janice
     
  10. vantage

    vantage Active Member

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    My kids play with stuff they know they would not play with if they went to PS. They realize this and even discuss it between them. I think it is funny that they can discuss and analyze these things.

    Just the other day, I heard one say some thing like, " I guess if we went to school they would think we were geeks for liking (some tv show) still." The other one said, I would have had to give up my littlest pet shops already. Then they pondered weather or not PS kids around here watch BBC as much as they do.

    I asked my older dd a question today about our decorating plans, and she answered that it was a "fine idea and all but....." and I responded by asking her what would it take to be a "brilliant" idea. LOL

    Kids will be kids and they are not all alike. But given enough peer pressure they can be pushed into not being themselves. Not all kids want to be adults or play adult games before they are old enough.
     
  11. Embassy

    Embassy New Member

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    If that is his example, I wouldn't pay an attention to his advice! Wow! Should I say that my almost 10 year old ds was playing Wonder Pets with his younger sister yesterday? He had lots of fun as he always does, lol.

    My kids are out of the loop on pop culture in general. I was as a kid too - no biggie! There are far more important things in life.
     
  12. hermione310

    hermione310 New Member

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    Considering the messages of much of pop culture, I view being "out of the loop" as a good thing!
     

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