Did you ever have a spectacular parenting failure? One so cringe-worthy you can't think about it without wincing? LOL When Elle was about 10 months old, I was bringing tons of groceries and supplies into the house (think Sam's Club and a week's groceries). I was making a LOT of trips...so I put Elle in her play room that was baby gated. The room was full of toys, everything was safety proofed, nothing to tip over...great room! So...I was bringing the groceries in and I could hear her making happy baby sounds. Singing and babbling to herself...she sounded very happy and content. So I kept bringing stuff in, putting it away. Then, I see my cat leap over the baby gate and go into the room....which was weird. Because you know how cats AVOID the death grip baby who loves to pull ears and tails and slobber...they tend to run the other way. And Elle is still singing to herself...so happy. So I look in there...and Elle is gripping a dead mouse in her hand... And of course she's stuck it in her mouth. :shock: And is poking it with her other finger and kicking her legs....absolutely LOVING her treasure. Oh Jaysus, help me.......I SCREAMED. LOL. I did. I snatched her up and pried it out of her clenched fist and raced her to the bathroom where I tried washing her tongue with Listerine. LOL. Seriously....I was just freaking out. Which seems so stupid now...but at the moment...I was sure the toxic mouse germs would kill her dead within minutes. At this point, Elle was screaming (because I'm trying to wash her tongue! :roll And I call my mother in law in hysterics (because I can't tell my mother I've done this horrible thing!). My mother in law is a vet, and I actually get her out of one of her office appointments...and tell her what's happened...and ask if I should take Elle to the emergency room. I'm crying, Elle is crying in the background. I've told her about the Listerine. And she starts laughing....and laughing....and laughing. And pretty soon I'm laughing, too. She assures me that Elle will be just fine. That year for Elle's birthday, my mother in law bought her a box of fake mice cat toys to play with. And of course...she loved them. No wonder my kid is gonna be a biologist. LOL. Anyone else have a Horrible Mom of the Year moment? Everyone has one of these gems...
I an actually, LITERALLY, rolling on the floor laughing my butt off!!!! HA AH HA!!!! Gotta wait on mine b/c I'm on my iPad, but...when I can type it all out, I will. Maybe not as funny as yours! HA HA HA!
Glad to entertain! It just occurred to me that EVERYONE has one of these epic fails...somewhere in their history. Just figured it was healthy...and funny...to compare horror stories with empathy and support. We've all had a whopper or two...it's just so human.
So we were always big on watching "Nature" videos, like National Geographic, Trails of Life and this dinosaur movie called "Walking with Dinosaurs". (The old one without the talking dinos.) We are at a block party with friends with our 3 boys. and this mom and dad ask our (then) 4 year old if he likes the "Wiggles". And he looks at them and says, "No, I like KILLERS!" and growls loudly. The parents grab their kid and start backing up. Dh and I are mortified and we were lamely trying to explain about the Nature videos. (But these parents were sure that they had met the next serial killer.)
Mine wasn't at all funny. I was working, and my mom was my full-time babysitter. The bus picked up/dropped off dss from Mom's house. I picked up Rachael and Jason, put the baby in the back seat in her car seat, and Jason sat up front with me. Rachael was sleeping, Jason and I talking away. We stopped at the store, Jason and I got out, went in to pick up a few things, and when I got back the car, I saw the baby in the back where I had totally forgot about her, leaving her in the car. It still gives me chills when I think of all the "could have's". Rachael was about three months old at the time.
I had pregnancy brain with this one: I was pregnant with Rhoslyn when I was at my parents house. I was in a hurry to pick up DH from work (bc I was Late), and hurriedly packed the kids in the car and drove off. Once on the road I asked if everyone had fun. Me: So, Beau, did you have fun? Tink? You too? Beau: *Giggles* Yeah, I had fun! *more giggles* Tink: *crying hysterically* Me: What in the world is going on?! We are going to pick up Daddy and go shopping... Beau: Without Pat? Me: WHAT?!?!?!?!!?!?!?! I had driven off and completely left poor ole Pat behind!! Thankfully, my parents had a fenced in yard and had seen him outside! He was completely oblivious that we had left, but Tink was terrified that we had left without him!! I'll tell you a funny story my Dad tells me and cracks up TO THIS DAY about it. When he was a boy he and his two sisters would travel in the back of the pick up truck that had a camper shell on the back of it. My Poppy and Nonna wired it with an intercom to talk back and forth to the kids on (gotta love the rules about seatbelts back then, huh?). They were on a long road trip and had stopped at a gas station to fill up and go to the bathroom. Once Nonna and Poppy were back in, they radioed back in the camper shell to see if everyone was in. My Dad said everyone was, so they took off down the road in "BFE-God-knows-where" countryside. Eventually my Nonna looks back in the camper and only counts 2 kids!!! My dad had intentionally left one of his sisters behind!! They had to turn around and go back for her, and it took about a half an hour to drive back and get her. Dad said she was sobbing in front of the gas station! My dad got his butt beat right there, but he said it was worth it. I've always thought this was hilarious!! While I'm telling funny stories (aren't you glad you started this tangent?): We sometimes play tricks on the kids. Shocker. I know. Our children will be traumatized for life. Anyway...We will get them all buckled then DH will laugh maniacally and say, "You boys ever been to MEX-I-CO?!" (From Super Troopers.....You know?) And he'll back out of the driveway without me, and I'll try and suppress a laugh as I slow-mo run down the drive and make terrible faces and fake cry (don't you wish you were our neighbor?). Well, it was on the tail in of Winter when we did this, this year. He pulls out, kids are screaming, I slow-mo run....right into a patch of ice. Smack dab into it. So one foot goes one way, the other foot goes another, and soon I look like Bambi scooting around on the ice!! My husband about DIED laughing!!!! So did I!!!I am quite certain I even snorted a few times!!!
LOL! These are great! For those who accidentally left kids behind...it just happens. To every parent, I think. One good scare usually cures you, but until you get that scare...you're at risk. I remember one afternoon Elle and I were gardening when she was about 3. I was working and distracted....and all of a sudden noticed she'd gone missing. She'd been talking about Little Bear...and I knew it was about time for it to come on...peeked in the window and swore I saw her move a blanket on the couch. After about fifteen minutes, I came in to check on her....and it was the dog on the couch moving the blanket. The kid was gone. Poof! No where to be found. And it had probably been twenty five minutes at that point since I'd seen her. I panicked...looked everywhere. Screamed outside. She was missing and my blood was running cold. Called my husband, called my inlaws at the clinic (less than a mile away), called my neighbors. Had everyone looking in the field and around the house, down at the lake. Called the police, and they told me to call back when she'd been missing an hour. She'd been missing nearly an hour when my husband got home and found her. She was sleeping in plain sight in a huge pile of stuffed animals in the corner of her bedroom with just her head peeking out...like ET. She had neatly arranged all the animals around her...and hardly a speck of her body was showing...just a little head poking out at the far corner. Hubby said he wouldn't have seen her if she hadn't shifted around in her sleep and caused the whole pile to wiggle. I have never been so scared. OMG...I was just shaking. Hubby...was laughing...because he was relieved, and thought the swat team I assembled was pretty impressive. I had my inlaws, all the employees of their clinic...and some of their CLIENTs there looking (including some of the dogs that were coming in for shots that day...lol) combing the fields like bloodhounds. After we signaled we'd found her, everyone took turns peeking in at her under the pile of toys. I apologized, but the general consensus was that the situation was pretty understandable. Just one of those crazy adventures kids put their parents through. Elle woke up at the end...just as the police were checking in on us. LOL. Later that night, in this very composed and solemn way...she told us..."I'm sorry. I won't sleep in comfortable animals again." She seemed to be VERY concerned about the police paying us a visit! LOL Ah man, you survive. But sometimes ya wonder how.
Oh, dear! Poor little girl probably thought she was going to taken to jail for sleeping with her animals!!!
LOL...yep. They're so funny. What a place to sleep! And to arrange them all perfectly like that was just too much. Reminds me of a time I was trying to track down a really weird smell in Elle's room (around the same time) She had this little woven wooden hamper (small...like one foot square) that she liked to sit on and color or look at books. I'd see her in there all the time, sitting there and looking at her books. The smell was definitely coming from the hamper. I opened it, and found five chicken eggs she'd taken from the fridge who-knows-when...and a nest she'd made of shredded paper, sticks, fabric scraps, paper towel...the works. It was a SERIOUS nest. LOL. With old stinky chicken eggs in there. Had to throw the whole thing out...was seriously smelly at that point....but I was so tickled, I was talking about it at the clinic, and a client lent me a small incubator and a dozen live eggs to hatch. Elle LOVED watching the eggs hatch. We took most of the chickens back to the farm, but they allowed Elle to keep a couple as pets. For several years, we had fresh eggs from our two pet chickens. LOL.
That has happened to me too. It was horrifying. Thank goodness it was cool outside. We live in the south where babies die in the heat. I ended up turning the baby around forward facing sooner than 2 yrs old as a result. I felt it was much easier to remember her there when she was facing front and I kept my purse in her seat, or on the floor in front of her seat.
I had a friend that left her baby in the car while she was unloading groceries into her house and when she was done she panicked because she hadn't brought the baby in first. She was pregnant at the time and tends to have "pregnancy brain". It was only 65 degrees out and the baby was only out there for 20 minutes. My friend told her therapist about it (who is YOUNG and not married, no kids) and her therapist freaked out and called CPS. They investigated and determined that she was negligent. She fought it and lost. All it makes me do is realize you can't make any mistakes or someone might turn you in.
Makes me realize you cannot tell anyone. While it was a mistake that she forgot the baby, it was also a huge mistake that she told her therapist. Did they take away the baby then?
Not to play devil's advocate....but a lot depends on what your friend was seeing her therapist for. If she was having postpartum or another form of depression, the therapist might have been legitimately concerned about her well being (and the kid's safety). I would a lot rather see a therapist err on the side of caution than have something terrible happen to the kids. (I think most moms would feel this way, even about themselves. Better to have CPS step in than something awful happen. With CPS, you can jump through the hoops and get another chance. If something horrible happens to your kid, you can't take it back, you know? CPS would be humiliating and a head ache, but you'd get past it and laugh about it at some point.....A dead or badly hurt kid...would destroy you with remorse, you'd never forgive yourself.) Other information about her situation that you're not aware of might have played a role, too. Meds she was taking, other incidences, observed mood change by the therapist. Something made this therapist violate client patient privacy......it was more substantial than a single human mistake. It's unusual for CPS to take children away. I have a close friend who is a social worker who actually DOES investigations for neglect...and you really don't have to be perfect to pass. Your house can be messy, you can make human mistakes. But they do start to worry when there's evidence that the kids are in danger. If she failed the investigation, and lost her appeal....there's more to the story than that single incident. Heck, I LOST my kid for an hour and called the cops...no one sent CPS. Something else must be going on with this.
One time when my son was 3, I sent him to his room for a nap. He had hearing and speech delays, so he didn't say very many words. He came out a minute later, and said something, but i just I sent him back, thinking he wss just stalling. After about the 5th time, I spanked his butt and took him by the hand to his bed. And he had probably several hundred little friends crawling all over his bed - ants. They were everywhere! All over the bed, the floor, the walls!!! No wonder the poor little guy didn't want to go to bed. I felt so bad
Oh man, that's awful! Poor kid, and poor mom, too. I had a similar situation happen when Elle kept telling us there was a GIANT praying mantis in her curtains. She was absolutely freaked out. But she'd spent a good part of the day looking at bug videos, so we were convinced she was imagining it as she was going to sleep. Both myself and her father pretty firmly said..."There is NO praying mantis, Elle. GO TO SLEEP." And of course.....there was. HUGE monster of one, 5 inches long. I felt terrible, too. I feel your pain!
Yes there were other things going on too. I personally don't that think the neglect should have stuck though. She was going through a hard time with her 10th pregnancy and she was seeing the therapist to help her not get so angry with her seriously defiance and violent child. She also suffers from depression. They never took her kids or the baby which she was grateful for and I will say it was a wake up call for her. She is doing much better now and has switched to a new therapist. One of the things I should mention is the therapist she was seeing was a 19yo college student through a local program that offers free service to low income families. The therapist reported it and then told her supervisor (which is backwards, she was supposed to ask the supervisor first and discuss it). The supervisor said she didn't feel it warranted calling cps, but what was done was done. Also my friend has had a former cps worker in her home twice a week for the last 5 years to provide therapies for her dd that is handicapped. When she told him about the accusation he was floored and went to bat for her saying her has never seen anything that would cause concern. The judge on the case was an unmarried grandma aged woman with no children and she told my friend that anyone with more than 3 kids is guilty of neglect. So my friend thinks that the charges stuck because the judge already had preconceived notions about family size and other things.
Well, when Eli was about 3 or 4 months old I was working and Dh brought the kids in to see me, and to feed Eli since he was refusing a bottle. I placed him in his carseat before they left to help a customer. I got busy so Dh took the boys and drove home. He thought I had buckled him when I put him in the seat. It was warm outside and he had the top off the jeep. When they arrived home, Dh called me to let me know that Eli was not buckled into the carseat. I literally had to sit down and calm myself with the images flying into me head of what could have happened. He was just laying on top of the buckles. Very easily he could've rolled out of the seat and out of the jeep. I still get anxiety thinking about it. (The speed limit on the road was 55.) I wish that was my only example but it was by far the scariest.
