I really have messed up. I believe in educating my children at home especially in today's education system. I have discovered my child is really not getting what she is supposed to . I have limited time to spend with each one on a one on one basis and have taught my kids that they need to do as much on their own as possible. I have missed grading some of my child's work and she is failing. That means that I am failing. I just took her backward in spelling and now am thinking the same is needing to happen for other subjects. How do I deal with this? Do I just switch curriculum completely? Do I just back up and start over with my babysitting her every move? I feel so bad about all of this. Any input will be weighed out in my mind. Please if any of you have had this kind of problem and fixed it, please share how. I have 6 children and feel like I did fine with the first ones but am failing the last few.
NO, YOU ARE NOT FAILING!!! How old is she? What EXACTLY is the problem? Why do you feel she is failing? Compared to who? I knew for sure I had failed my middle child. I could give you a gigantic list of all the things she DIDN'T learn. But when it came time to take her ACT test, she did much better than I ever imagined! So I hadn't done so badly after all!
She is struggling in math and spelling. I just don't feel like I have enough of me to go around and I really have to help her before it gets worse. She is 9 and in the 4th grade. Thanks Jackie!!
I have one that has graduated one in her last year, a freshman, my 4th grader and a 4 year old kindergartener and a 3 year old not ready for bookwork yet.
Stop, take a deep breath and relax. You are not failing, you discovered the issue. Ok there seems to be a problem in at least one subject. Now that you have corrected the work, talk to her to see if she can pin point the issue. Maybe the curriculum is not working for them, maybe you need to keep up on corrections better (I sure know I do) because she is having attention issues. What you need is a break to see what is going on and go from there. As Jackie said I am sure she knows a lot more than you think she does. Sometimes kids get to a place where they need a change up or a little extra monitoring from time to time. One solution might be to have one of the older children help do some of the corrections for you. Then you can just skim to see if there is an issue. You might find that the type of curriculum you are using just does not work with this one child. I have found that sometimes I need to switch things mid year because it just was not working for that child. It is hard to tell without speaking to the child and seeing what is actually going on with the work. My suggestion is really examine where she is at in each subject (mid year is a great time to do that with all the kids), talk to her to see if she can identify what is going on, increase the monitoring at least for a few weeks and then do more frequent checks, and then change the curriculum if that is the issue. I hope you find the answer and just remember this is one of the benefits of hs'ing, you have found a problem and can go back and fix it. Who cares if they are not right where they "should" be but instead she will not be lost because you have the freedom to go back and redo it until she gets it.
Thanks mschickie! I am trying to figure out how to best tackle all the issues. I am not sure that it is the curriculum. I think she is trying to just hurry through and get finished. I am still trying to figure out how to fill in the gaps. Have any of you used anything online that we could test fill in gaps and then after we get her all caught up go back to what we were doing? I know that each curriculum is a bit different but I really need to catch her up but not make her feel like she is a failure so to speak. I also could use some automated grading while we try to catch up or figure out exactly where she is struggling. Any input is appreciated!!!
The idea of being behind in school is a product of standardization. Kids aren't standard though, so I think that each kids should set their own standard. If they improve and progress at a steady rate whether quickly or slowly, they are right on time for their own unique development schedule. My son is 13. He's been "behind" by the standard from the start, but he's like the turtle in the race with the hare. His progress has been slow and steady. In some areas, he reached a point where he could race ahead and catch up, and in others, like spelling, he's still trudging along and improving. Most of his peers are finished with formal spelling study, but he is still working on it AND still improving. He'll catch up to the standard, but it might be when he's a senior in high school. In addition, you can take comfort in the fact that most spelling and math programs use a spiral approach. If she didn't master it the first turn around, she'll get another chance when it comes around again.
You might need the school year to go a little longer for her but that is ok. I am not sure what grade she is in so depending on where she is at you might not need to worry about "finishing" the full curriculum. In NYS you actually only have to finish 80% of your planned curriculum for the year. Also remember that most ps teachers do not finish their entire curriculum in one year so you probably have some leeway because most homeschoolers finish the entire curriculum/textbook.
Thank you to everyone!! I am rethinking what to do. I know it is not all her fault. I just want to give her the best education I can. I was a strait A student and sometimes I might expect more out of my kids. She is struggling in some areas but I trying to figure out the best way to help her with those areas. Thanks again.
Figure out the reason for the failure. I think I can help with this, because I have failed for every reason out there, then re-evaluated, made changes, and did ok again! If it's time, take a close look at the leaks in your schedule. Because I work from home four days per week, I put together a pretty strict schedule for me and my family and I try to stick to it. I also put together a weekly menu, so I'm not ever wasting time during the day. If you stil don't have time, then look into bringing a tutor into the home, or signing her up for some classes outside the home. If it's curriculum, don't be afraid to change. We switched this year from Saxon to Math U See and I'm really happy with that change. Earlier this year both my kids struggled with math, so we put the books away and I printed worksheets for a month, until they understood it again. Then we went back to the book. I hope this helps! Don't feel like a failure - I swear this homeschooling gig is always a moving target!
Thank you Laura. I still struggle with me and that is something I must do. Scheduling is tough for me. My husband is home a lot, I have two teenagers working, I have a 3 and 4 year old that constantly interrupts... I also am tired!!! I would love to take a year break.... I know that won't work though. I would just be behind.. lol I have changed up part of her curriculum and backed up in some of it. Hopefully we can get through this so she isn't behind. I know, "what is behind?" I guess I would love to keep her as close to her grade level as I can. Thanks for your input and help. It is good to know there is a support group out there!
I am coming into this late but wanted to add-- I had a gap in my ds1 when he was in 7th grade in February I realized he was missing a LOT of what he had been taught earlier, I knew this by the fact his sister knew how to do it and they used the same curricula. So I took the month of February and made it review month. I went to the store and bought a cheap type of Math book in 3rd through 6th grade, then started him out. He thought it was silly cause it was so easy at first but I worked with him doing it on his own for the most part after I explained it to him, he got it and went on to graduate as Honor Math student in High School. English, writing spelling stuff, I found my younger ds learned more with BJU, then SOS, but ds1 is poor speller, and ds2 graduating this year offically is excellent at spelling. it does not always come out the same with each child, this is what I am getting at. I am sure you know that being as you have graduated one already, you are definitely not failing. I thank God that each child can learn as they need to in Home School.
Sorry for the slow response. Thank you for the reminder. I was having one of those times that things were not going well. I believe she seems to be learning a lot now. We bought some different stuff and are working through it. I still struggle with wanting her to be up to grade level by the end of the year. I know in some aspects she will be but others maybe not. Moving forward with a positive attitude (that is the plan at least). I backed her up in her math curriculum and are moving slowly forward but moving forward non the less. I am needing to revisit what I should do next year but for now this is the plan.
