today has been a very frustrating day... sooo frustrating that I almost want to send his happy little behind back to public school... my story: 11 yo was in ps from k - 2cd grade. He got real good at playing dumb so he'd get to spend more time in resource class. in K he was little behind so got 1/2 hour a week by 2cd grade he was in resource for 1 hour a day and told that if his work in regular class involved reading writing or math he didn't have to do it. He also tested 1 1/2 yrs behind. grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! after much research we decided to homeschool. At first he was excited. We've gone through several different curriculum. This year he wanted to do the public school/partnership deal with Christa Mcaullife Academy. Sounded good to us. He actually did put an effort into the assignments. I guess he's found that he don't like it or something because he's back to his old games... Mom what's the answer to this... mom do my work for me (he don't say that outright but that's his meaning) This is our 3rd yr homeschooling and I'm too a point that I can't stand the frustration.... We've tried unschooling bob jones, Alpha Omega, CLE, and Switched on schoolhouse. Hubby don't like unschooling he prefers to see progress (public school attitude) We've tried letting him pick a topic and researching it.. That is fine until he figures out that it's school related then he quits trying. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! Today his assignment is a book report. pretty simple one too but he fights and argues about it. He had to also complete a test about the Nubian society... He enjoyed reading about them and doing some activities but when it came to test time Open book he did lousy. The online system for his school allows him to take a test up to 5 times and he has to get 80% to pass. He did it 6 times (1 I made up a test for him on the topic) Highest he got was 61% another GRRRRRRRRR for mom. geez he had the answers in front of him but he just didn't put any effort into it at all. the ugh its schoolwork so I'm not gonna do it and I'm gonna take forever to get nothing done attitude. It drives me crazy at times. His online school is up in June and with his attitude dad and I decided not to continue it.. Any suggestions on what to do instead??? anybody?????
cailet, I hear your frustration, I also have that with my 12 yo. I don't have any answers. I know that there are people on this forum that will have some suggestions to you that might work. I go through this every so often, my dh will NOT let me put him back in school, any school. I started taking things away from him. Right now I use not allowed outside, it has been really nice and he has buckled down a little. We only have 2 more days of school and we will be finished for the year. Hip Hip Horay!!! I keep telling myself only 6 more years.
I'm right there with you. 12 yo ds does the same thing. What's so hard about picking out the adjectives in sentances? or nouns? Ann
Ann, we were going over Language today and that's right picking out adjectives, prepositions and pronouns - He had a hard time with that until I once again went over each one. I am tired of hearing, "I can't do this". I have taught him these all year and still...
Hummm two things you might want to look at. First of course is acknowledge their age. grrrrr They are really hitting what is referred to as "middle school brain fog". Those hormones are firing and are sucking all life out of the brain. Second thing you might want to look at is their "love language" There are several books on this topic but...the one for kids is The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman & Ross Campbell Different people feel loved and appreciated by different ways and if their way isn't being shown then....of course "you don't love them". well...that's what they think. Deep breath...it's labor pains all over again.
Wow Sheila! I recently read an article on that topic! Very good article. I have been trying to impliment that with my girls. Seems to work with my oldest who is almost 11.
I just got here to this forum and didn't think I'd be posting so soon, but would like to put my 2 cents worth in. My son is 9 and we went through the exact same thing in ps, and now sometimes even during our homeschooling day. What works for some, won't work for others but here is what we do. I created my own historical unit study. We are now working on Sumeria. I use a ton of hands-on stuff like making mudbricks, planting cucumbers, making a model of the Euphrates River and a field in a cookie sheet with real dirt and water and stuff to show irrigation, this kind of thing. At the end of this unit we will do a Mesopotamian feast and he will give a presentation for all our relatives. He retains a lot more with this hands-on stuff and is more willing to do a worksheet of math problems correctly if he knows we have something more interesting to do afterwards. We take frequent breaks and still get everything done by noon. I live in NYState, and have to have him tested, give quarterly reports and so on, and we are still up to par according to those powers that be (superintendent of ps system) so it's working acedemically speaking. We also don't allow television or video games during the hours 9 to 3. This encourages him also, seeing as how there is little else to do in his mind. (On really bad days we just ground him to his room, to his bed for the whole day since HE made the DECISION to not want to do anything productive ie whining and carrying on.) I hope some of this helps. I know it's hard when the smartest kids pretend to be dumb. It's just laziness imho and it's a hard habit to break. Good luck to you, and if you happen to find other things that work, let me in on it, lol!
I am right there with you....some days are so hard...:x Recently, I discovered that dd11 will do things she thinks are really boring, and try her best, if there is a certificate at the end...so now I am making lots of certificates. She tends to be lazy, but is really clever, very frustrating...but this seems to be helping. I tell her that to get a certificate, she needs to get over 85%. Another idea I read just the other day, and we started using it yesterday, was to earn computer minutes by doing school work. My kids aren't allowed computer except for educational stuff on school days at all, so this is working well for them. The idea is that for every correct maths question, they earn one computer minute. We are also using it for music practice - 5 mins practice = 1 min computer time. We are graphing what they earn and what they use. I have been looking for ways to get ds10 to do more maths, and music is always a struggle with dd11 (that lazy thing again). Yesterday was much better...I hope it continues. Ds did twice as much maths as usual, and dd didn't argue about music practice. Maybe it will be useful for some of you. here it the link for the article I read about the computer time thing:http://www.loveathome.com/homeschool/15_minute_school.htm
We've tried rewards, earning game time (xbox, computer or gameboy) We also have 2 little ones at home that are 3 and 5 and are in special ed preschool because of speech delays. 11 yoson is very touchy feely type which I am not as much. I've actually went through a seminar that touched on the five love languages. We've asked if he wants to go back to b & m ps but he doesn't. He got teased a lot because of being in resource but he loved the 1 on 1 from the resource teacher. Right now with his online school he has to have 25 hours learning activities a week and complete 1 course each month. The course includes the computer work, a 25 word vocabulary diary (he has to write his guess, actual meaning, and a sentence for each word) and a book review. The book review is simple: title, author, genre, how you would rate it on a scale of 1 to 4 stars 1 being lowest, a 1 - 2 paragraph summary of the book and then 1 paragraph based on a question ie... which character would you like to be friends with and why? pretty simple. I think... Thanks for the suggestions though If nothing else it is good encouragement along with great ideas. Since we aren't planning on continuing this online school (why waste taxpayer's money for something he doesn't try at) I need ideas of what to do instead. We do school year round so come June I'm at a loss.
You touched on a couple of important things that I quoted above. He is a touchy feely type and he loves the 1 on 1. He's not going to get much out of a computer program, because he's more of a people person. So I suggest you find stuff that is NOT on the computer and see if that helps. He likes the 1 on 1, it sounds like it helps him to have someone pay attention just to him, and help him and have a good time together. That can be accomplished with you with the MOH and SOTW type history curric.s, or others that have you working 1 on 1 with him. I'm thinking he'd like hands-on stuff too, it sounds like, and those curric.s fit that bill also. My ds is 13 and he loves it when I sit and go over his English with him. He also likes that 1 on 1 time. We use the Rod & Staff English. The Teacher's books are so clear about what to say and do! Others we tried intimidated me, because they seemed to assume you knew all about this stuff. I had very little good teaching of English/Language when I was going to school, because we moved so much. So English was very spotty, and I DIDN'T know all that stuff! But with this curriculum and the way the great teacher's books are laid out, I GET IT! And I CAN help him! So that's a suggestion also. You certainly don't have to use these curriculums, they're just suggestions that seem to fit. But I WOULD suggest focusing on curriculum that you can work with him, even for a few minutes a day, where it's just you and him, and you go over stuff and have fun. And also some hands-on stuff.
http://www.booksamillion.com/ncom/b...thor&find=mcgraw+hill&ad=OVBKSAUTH&Ntk=author lots of ideas here, and with mcgrawhill itself. This link up there has good prices so far and it will do a comparison price check for you! The more I learn of subjects and companies the more I am getting lost in what to do next year. In my experience with frustration with kids , when they have attitudes of "I can't do this" I do like was suggested and remove things they think they can do... playing stuff, tv, etc. And Once the focus is totaly on school work then its amazing what they can do... also for math I have used crackers, etc even jelly beans ( you can get those in sugar free if you need too too!) and such for counters even with my older kids!Just to make it fun! ALso after a subject then get a drink of a special drink, a sip like, or a ticket , Tickets are cool here we save them up to buy things I purchase on sale or clearance ... they have to have a good week of school to get 5 , for each day they did not do good they have to pay me a ticket! Unless it was my problem then they get it just the same. So say if he gave you problems with doing school work one day, first is a warning, second is a warning third is a ticket 3 strikes your out! We actually had 3 strikes papers with my first child for disciplinging him. It worked well! This is rambly so I hope you get the ideas I tossed out... ask me if it seems to short of explaination sometimes my brain thinks the words and I type only portion of them. OH! one more thing, When my ds9 gets that way I do the work oraly. That way he tells me the answers and I write or type with sos, them in. It lets him have some freedom to not write and also lets him get the work done. Mind you the child has to spell it and you have to force yourself to do it wrong if he gives you the wrong answer! Also have your kid teach you the lesson, act dumb yourself like you don't know what to do.... see if he knows it. That usually makes my kids have fun because they realise half way through that its a game!
starting in september I'll have more time for 1 on 1. My younger 2 will actually do preschool at the same time in the afternoons 3 days a week instead of 1 in the morning and 1 in afternoon like now.. That will give me more time to focus just on 11 yo. I've started to look at MOH and SOTW they both look very interesting and like something he'd be interested in. Right now his spelling and writing is just horrible and it's something dad things he needs to work on over the summer. Dad's suggestion was for copywork of interesting things that 11 yo picks himself to work on handwriting... We use spellingtime and he loves it for spelling. That doesn't take much time on the computer but he loves it. (YEA!!!! one subject I don't have to fight too much about) Question: Can SOTW or MOH be used with younger kiddo's? Like read it to them as stories while Older one does the reading or mom does the reading?
cailet, Absolutely! In fact, it's probably good for the oldest to read some of it to the little ones! That helps their self-esteem, and is also good practice to read orally! The little ones can color or something quiet while you or big brother are reading! Even ds can work on coloring the map stuff, or the figures from the book (if you had SOTW) while you read. Another thing I do is have a timeline on the wall AND in their Hisotry notebooks. I get timeline figures from www.timelinesetc.com There are other places to get the figures, that's just what I found and started using to go with SOTW, before I ever heard of MOH. You can also Google the name of the person in images and see what comes up.
We are doing a unit study on magnets at the moment. We were talking the other day after school, in the car (as you do) and both kids were surprised that there is so little writing in this unit. I told them that this is more of a hands on kind of unit....ds10 says "that's good....L learn better that way I think". When did he get to be so cluey? Maybe your ds has some suggestions about how he's like to learn? Also, unit studies are great because each one can be different, so if you're both sick of something, or it's not working, or whatever, then it's easy to change it for the next unit, which is usually soon, rather than having to commit to something for a whole year. We also use programs like Deena described for some subjects, like english and maths. My ds is also great at listening, so audio books, being read aloud to, music (he is learning 2 musical instruments), these things also work well. Have you seen the multiple intelligences for learning teaching styles? I found a website a while ago that had an online questionaire that helped you analyse what kind of learner you were, and then teaching/learning suggestions to go with it. If you are interested, let me know and I will try and find it again. it might help to find his strengths and work from there.
You gals are actually helping ME TOO! I am asking my kids now what they want to learn.. Iused to look and decide myself on whats easier for me to folow with three.... but now I am asking them , hmm does this look like it would interest you?
AussieMum, That's great that he has figured that out! Very perceptive of him! It is truly amazing how much better they learn when they can use the learning style that best fits them! I ask my dd10 now too. Some stuff I thought looked good she said she didn't think she'd do well in, and told me why! Whoa, how do they know that stuff already?!
I have found that even though I do get his input and do things that he said he would want to do. (unit studies etc) that within 1 week he doing the attitude it's school stuff I don't wanna. part of my frustration there. I've learned that his learning style is wierd... He learns very well from movies and hands on type stuff. Also if he's read to only if he's interested in the material that is read to him otherwise he looks like he's listening but he's really tuned out. Now my 5 yr old she loves to try to read (look at pictures and jabber oabout them) she also loves when she's read to. We've tried to work with her a little bit on K type stuff and she enjoys it. Can sit for 1 - 2 hours with mom and little bro and work on worksheets and such. She loves to draw a lot. Only irritating thing there is she gets my printer paper so when I go to print something YIKES no paper in the printer but oh well. My learning style is so different from my 11 yo and I think that's part of my frustration. I am a reader. Worksheets, reading books etc. Just make tons of sense to me. I have to work on doing things different with my kiddo's.
cailet, your household sounds like mine. My grown son was the same way - he didn't like school. I asked him, what would have made the difference to help you like school. He told me he didn't like it and there was nothing I could have done. I have tried many things with Elijah, and these suggestions I'm sure will be a help. Today is our last day of official school this year and he is struggling even now. He thinks we don't need school today, what would make the difference - that's what he said. I am as strong willed as he - he WILL do school today. I even told him everything was open book - He is still grumbling. Lord get me through today One the other hand his sister, 3 years old, love to "do school" she has her own workbooks and works in them all the time. She loves to color and stay in the lines, complains if she gets out of the line. She loves to trace her letters and numbers, etc. Next year is another year - only 6 more years to go. I will be 59 then and 68 when dgd graduates. One day at a time.
First.. breathe.. try to remember the reason you took him out of school to begin with.. I have a 10 yr old son.. who has adhd. and he is sooo smart.. but he thinks i think he is dumb or something.. we have been doing this for only 3 weeks and i KNOW i have a LONG road ahead... but there has got o be a way that will work with your son!
I read some of the other posts on here and there are many great ideas I will be using when we start school back up next year.. i love the ticket idea! we are just learning litle things now.. we have done all sorts of things about Bees this week. we went on lots of be searching walks! I have learned soo much.. i did not realize honey is from bees regurgitate thier food.. umm eeww.. lololol but found that out today!
