HELP! Santa vs Non Santa People

Let me start by saying I grew up with Santa. I love the tradition and we are a Santa family here. (We also know the true meaning of Christmas and talk about that more) That said. I run a homeschool group that allows all belief systems into it. Most of the group is strictly Christians. Long story short. I was speaking with a new mother of the group about my daughter loving drama and there not being enough opportunities to be involved locally as they are so young. She offered to have my daughter join in her church's Christmas production. I was thrilled as was my daughter. However, in the opening part of the play which I just read now...they dismiss Santa completely...um my daughter still believes. My daughter is 8. I want her to continue to have the happiness of the Santa tradition as long as she can. I am not sure how to mention this to a Christian who doesn't have Santa without sounding lame or negative. I don't know. Maybe just to the point would be best. When I eagerly agreed to the play I never thought Santa would be mentioned at all. I grew up in a church where we had plays that stuck to the Christmas story and never included Santa at all one way or the other. I was a little surprised to read the script. There are a couple of other things I have trepidation over as well. If you would like to look it over for yourself here is the link http://www.sunday-school-center.com/support-files/a-christmas-to-believe-in.pdf




So advice in a kind fashion would be much appreciated. :angel:

 

As a non-Santa person, I'll tell you, my kids KNOW NOT TO TELL OTHER CHILDREN THERE IS NO SANTA.

I just couldn't do the Santa thing anymore, I don't lie to my kids, and it just felt like lying and I felt guilty about it. I didn't want them to question Jesus becuase I had lied about Santa... so we quit doing Santa when they were.... 4 & 6 I think. But even at that young, I drilled in them that should be careful when saying there is no Santa and make sure no kids are around.

Just last week, in Walmart, an older, grey-haired woman in Walmart asked my then 6 year old about Santa. He looked all around and made sure there no other kids on that aisle and whispered to her "There is no Santa, it's just mama and daddy"

Sorry, but debunking Santa in public to other people's children is just bad decorum. Offending people and making kids cry and parents angry is not the way to tell people that Jesus is the reason for the season.

I scanned the 1st 4 pages of that play... wow. No way would MY kids be in that play. The whole tone is wrong and "health class"....bad taste...no.

 

We are non-Santa people. I'd just thank her for the opportunity and tell her that it won't work for your family right now since you do the Santa tradition.

 

Thank you both. I agree the whole health class thing was another point I had thought was iffy to say the least.
And Josie B. I love that your children show tact. There is one woman in our group who proudly tells the world that her children know that Santa is dead! Eep. While it may be true it sure isn't how I would want my children explaining it to others.

 

We do Santa here... but you also should know, we are secular and celebrate Christmas more as an American tradition than anything, but do talk about how and why others all over the world and through history celebrate(d) Christmas.

I could not let my kids participate in the play given it would ruin their belief. Rylee still believes as do the little boys. At Girl Scouts, my 2 other girls do not believe in Santa and have made many comments about him not being real. Rylee puts up a good fight and she tells them they are crazy and she believes. So far, she isn't asking questions, and wrote her letter to Santa not long ago.... I will play the Santa magic as long as I can, we find it fun.

 

I'm not planning on Santa, it's not my tradition. But obviously my child will understand that other kids believe Santa is real. It's not my job to ruin their party!

doesn't look like a nice play either. bit passive aggressive.

 

I don't celebrate xmas, or santa, etc.

However, I also do not like the "tone" of the play even if I did. I agree with monkeysmum it's so passive aggressive.

I don't like the belittling way that one narrator talks to the other about his lack of belief in the xmas story.

I myself do believe in Jesus and he is my king and savior. To me talking down to some one or belittling their lack of faith is not the way to teach some one. It just seems like a really odd and weird way to "teach" some one to have faith in something. I don't like it. I don't like that it will teach other children to try to "teach" their peers in this way instead of how Jesus would with love, and care, and by using stories that the people of the time could relate to to understand and gain belief.

 

I grew up as a santa person and when mom told us the truth about it, I still believed because I believed in my parents.

After becoming Christians, I remember asking a child in our church if she was excited for santa to arrive (because we still carried on that whole charade with the boys) and her mom told me we don't do santa.... we want our children to be honest and by lying to them and saying santa (or the Easter bunny, tooth fairy, etc) exists we're lying to them which makes us hypocrites. Ouch!

We stopped the santa practice a year or so later and looking back, I have no regrets - only that we didn't do so sooner.... it took a lot of pressure off us when we were able to be truthful with the boys about it.

That said, the boys never told their friends that santa didn't exist.... they respected that other families still practice this.

What's important (to me anyway) is to remember the reason for the season... it isn't Santa.... it's Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior

 

A few years ago (before their family moved away), I had a friend, thoroughly Christian, who insisted that she believes in Santa "because if you don't believe, you don't receive!" Her kids were teens and young adults at that time, and in front of mom, would also "avow" that they believe too! It was just a fun tradition at their house, knowing full well the reality of Christmas.

Another friend of mine told me that they "got rid of Santa" at their house when they thought the kids were to old to keep pretending. They put a swatch of red flannel on a small nail in the window sill, and left a note "from Santa" that he was mad because of ripping his pants getting out of the window (no chimney), that he's not coming back, and that from now on, the only presents anybody will get in that house is ones they give each other. Santa Mouse continued, however.

Santa Mouse, in case you don't know the story, is a mouse Santa found and adopted a long time ago, and he likes to help Santa make kids happy. So a present from him would be something tiny and precious (he is a mouse, after all), and wrapped in the wrapper from a stick of chewing gum and tied within the branches of the tree. His present might be a piece of jewelry (not big or expensive, and dependent on the age of the child), the key to a car (for someone about to graduate from college), a tiny car for a tiny boy, a special coin or stamp for the collector, or a clue to the location of a present too big to put within the tree (still small, like a desired cap, or a little bigger, like a game for a video machine they already have, whatever).

They got rid of the Easter Bunny in similar fashion. Mama banned the Bunny because he made the house a mess! muddy pawprints and basket grass scattered ALL over.

Personally, my kids each got a Santa present under the tree until they were big enough to move out of the house on their own. And Easter candy - maybe not a basket, but candy. And Valentine candy. They have each approached the Santa question differently. DD has one daughter, 6, who still believes. DS had two boys, 4 and 8, who don't.

 

I don't think you even need to believe in Santa to enjoy the spirit of it. I grew up with St Nicholas and I clearly remember telling him that I was going to do my show and tell on him. I knew the tradition, I knew he lived 350yrs ago, I knew the truth, but in that moment of telling St Nicholas, he was real! I would have been about 10.5 then.

that's what I'm planning on doing with my child. To celebrate the spirit of the tradition. Not much point celebrating mid winter, when it's mid summer and I seriously dislike the commercialism here.

That said, I'm sure gullable little minds do believe, like they believe in fairy tales and monsters under the bed and that's fine with me. It must be very cute and I can't wait for my LO to be old enough to be absorbed in the story! He's only 2 now.

 

HA! I'm 36 and my brother will be 50 this Christmas and we STILL get gifts under my mom's tree from Santa!

 

I think you should just politely bow out of the production, and be honest about why... that your family enjoys the Santa tradition and you're not ready to give that up yet.

We've never done Santa, much to the disbelief and disappointment of most of our extended family. I vaguely remember that my mother encouraged a belief in Santa, but I honestly don't remember ever really believing. My husband's family did Santa until they were old enough to stop believing on their own. When it came time to start the whole Santa thing with our kids, we just couldn't do it. It just didn't feel right.

That said, my kids have always know who Santa is, and from the time they were very little, we pressed how important it was that they didn't ruin the illusion for those kids who chose to believe Santa is real.

 

This topic (not the play) but the Santa vs; Non Santa has come up every single year since I've been a member (and probably before that too)..... as does the Halloween and trick or treating and not.
I think its interesting to see how each family deals with it.
as for the play, I think everyone has given good advice about bowing out

 

We are also non-Santa people, but (as stated before) we're cool with others choosing to "believe". My children were told that playing make-believe is fun, and it's fun to pretend that Santa is real. They were also told that it was the responsibility of the parent to let a child know that Santa is make-believe, and we should just let a friend believe until their parents choose otherwise.

Yeah, Amy, it DOES come up every year, doesn't it?

One of my favorite memories of teaching public school was writing an interview with Santa for our Newsletter. My kids not only had to come up with good questions, but had to decide how Santa might answer them if he were real. They had him "taking off" every January and February, spending that time in Florida, relaxing on the beaches with Mickey Mouse!

 

Regardless of Santa or no-Santa, I wouldn't be OK with that play!

 

Thank you all for the great response. I am currently trying to get a hold of her to bow out.

 

I snickered at the Health Class lines . It's funny, but totally inappropriate for children and too irreverent for church. It's more along the lines of a youtube video!

 

I just finished reading the play, and I have to say that it reminds me of an episode of "The Vicar of Dibley", with Dawne French as the Vicar, and as Narrator 1, with one of the Dibley townspeople as Narrator 2. They could have changed the Santa part to something like "I used to believe in all sorts of things when I was small..." and not messed with specifics at all. ETA: I wasn't thrilled with the lines about health class, either.

 

I guess it depends on what is meant by 'believe'...

 

There are so many ironies in this thread.

Given what you have stated, IMO, your daughter should not participate in the play. If it starts by debunking Santa, then it is likely meant to be an evangelistic message about Jesus being God and not having a "false" god in Santa. If your daughter does not believe that message, and if the message of the Christmas Play is incompatible with her own belief in Santa, she could not participate with sincerity.

We played the Santa game, but the kids never bought into it. It has always been just a fun mythical/symbolic thing that evolved from a story about a man named Nicolas that evoled through the years into modern Santa. The kids have always been taught and have understood Santa as being part of the secular "version" of Christmas, ie a replacement for God. We give a "from Santa" gift and put a few bits of candy in the stockings as part of the American tradition of Christmas.

IF my kids tell another kid santa is not real.....oh well. Their parents should have sheltered them more. Socialization is a dangerous thing. (another irony, is it not)