I know it's never good to keep something from your children. I haven't told my kids that their Great Grandpa doesn't have long. They know he is not doing well and they have seen him in his hospital bed in him bedroom. I waited to say anything because you just never know how long a person can hang on. The hospice nurse said a matter of days. Well, that was nearly a week ago. My Mom stayed with us for 2 weeks after the hospice nurse told us within a few days. The reason why i haven't told them is because they are heading out to church camp in the morning. They will be back Wednesday afternoon and I don't want them dwelling on it the whole time they are gone. Am I wrong in this decision??? Angela
I don't think so. Children don't deal well with suspense and worry, and there's nothing they could do about it excpet worry. I think you're right. Amy
I would agree. Under normal circumstances I might tell them that grandpa is very sick and that he needs a lot of prayer, but I wouldn't say "he doesn't have long." But with them leaving in the morning, there's no sense in bringing it up, imo. They obviously know there's something going on, so they won't feel totally out of the loop if/when he does pass on.
I would wait and talk to them after they get back from camp. I would not want them to spend their camp time worried and upset. I will be praying for your family. Beth
I agree with the others. This spring dh's grandpa passed away. The 6 weeks or so before he died it was a constant back and forth of him being hospitalized/seeming okay/being in a nursing home/things looking better etc. Ds was almost 4 at the time and all I really told him was that he was sick. I never mentioned dying to him until he actually passed away. At the time, dh was deployed so I handled it on my on as best as I could, but I don't think I would have done it any differently even if he had been here. You and your family will be in my prayers.
Thanks for all the input. I can send them off in the morning feeling more secure about my decision. It's so nice to have a group like this I can come to about anything. You guys are awesome...
They know he's very sick, and I'm betting that they know he can go any time. So even if he should pass while they're at camp, I'm guessing it won't be a complete surprise to them. With that, I'm in agreement with everyone else. Saying something will only put the worry in the front of their mind.
I think you made the right decision. There isn't really any need to worry them. I think kids are pretty smart and they actually know, they just don't always verbalize it. For all you know they already said their good byes.
I think the last couple of times we all said our goodbyes in our own way. The time before last when they saw him he was up walking around and talking to us. Instead of saying bye,he always said "be good". The kids were adament about telling him bye that day and giving him a hug. And they don't give hugs to him most of the time. Actually I noticed the last couple of times they were insistant on making sure that he got a hug from them or a fake punch in the arm... They know. Thanks guys Angie
