WWYD. Re bunk beds, friend said she wanted them....having thoughts....

Discussion in 'Other Conversation' started by KristineIN, Jun 29, 2008.

  1. KristineIN

    KristineIN New Member

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    Ok, we've got some friends making my boys bunk beds, (I did give them $100 to help with the costs, but overall,we don't have to pay anything else) The boys are currently sleeping on bunkbeds that used to be mine that I did buy with my own money years ago. When we were moving and putting up the bunk beds, my I mentioned that they boys would eventually get new beds and that I would be getting rid of them. Well my friend who has girls (cause these are white beds that I have) said she would love them. At that point, I had thought about free cycling them anyway. However, now I'm thinking that I could sell them and make a little money (which we REALLY need right now and with Craigslist anymore it's so easy to try and sell stuff) However, I know my friend would not buy them, but her girls do already have bunk beds and she would probably turn around and sell the ones that she has (I doubt they would "give" stuff away, since they are hurting also) So what do I do now? Suck it up and just let her have them? Tell her that I really need the money and have thought about it and plan to sell the bunk beds? Ask her if it's a Need or a want and tell her that if it's just a "want" then I'm going to sell them? tell her that I "need" money so I will be selling them? The original conversation was over a year ago, but I did tell her that our friend has started on the boys' beds, so it will probably be just over a month or two before we have them.
    Thanks,
    Kristine
     
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  3. Actressdancer

    Actressdancer New Member

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    I'd be up front with my friend. I would just tell her that after further consideration, you are not in a position to simply give them away. That you'd be happy to offer them to her first for the discounted rate of $xx, otherwise you'll be posting them on Craig's List for $xx. A true friend would understand.
     
  4. MamaBear

    MamaBear New Member

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    We always just give things away like that and God has done the rest. It is amazing when we have placed it in God's hands that he has always provided for us. I believe that a random act of kindness will make full circle.
     
  5. Actressdancer

    Actressdancer New Member

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    I would agree with this statement 100%, but figured I'd go to the point of the OP and leave that one for another day ;). lol.

    But you're right. God has always been faithful to provide when we've been willing to donate. Matter of fact, He recently challenged me to forgo a garage sale and donate everything in the house that we didn't want to a charity that helps homeless men learn trades to get back on their feet. They keep whatever they can use and sell the rest via a thrift store, with the proceeds going towards the ministry.

    That being said, Kristine you have every right to sell whatever you see fit. It's entirely possibly that this is part of how God is choosing to provide for your family.
     
  6. KristineIN

    KristineIN New Member

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    Thank you, I do give a lot away, we had a garage sale this spring (first time in this neighborhood) this same friend, came and had a sale with me, I made about $35.00 and she was having a sale a few weeks ago and said I could bring my stuff, well, I didn't figure it was worth my time to make $20.00, in the meantime we were given a bunch of clothes that someone was going to just throw in a dumpster, I split up all of the clothing and freecycled them along with the rest of my leftover garage sale stuff. Plus, I look at it that if I sell it, I would be blessing someone by offering a cheap ($100-150) bunk bed, vs. a new bunk bed for $500-1000.00 Bunk beds are not cheap. I'm pretty certain if I gave her mine, she would turn around and sell her current one and make a profit, so I don't feel that is right in this situation, now if she didn't already have a bunk bed and needed it, then I wouldn't even hesitate to just "give" it away. In this case, she has a bunk bed, but the one I have is more "girly" The one she has, her girls have been using for years :?

    Thanks,
    Kristine
     
  7. RoadRunner

    RoadRunner New Member

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    I would have given the bunks away if I had kind of promised them to a friend. If you give freely it will be given to you freely.
     
  8. MamaBear

    MamaBear New Member

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    Do what the spirit moves you to do! :love: (((( ))))
     
  9. MamaBear

    MamaBear New Member

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    Perhaps the spirit may move her to give her bunk bed away if she is the recipient of your random act of kindness. KWIM :love:
     
  10. dawninns

    dawninns New Member

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    I think I would sit down with her and tell her what you've told us and that you feel you may need to sell the bunkbeds. I'd apologize and offer to help her spruce up and perhaps paint the ones she has as a surprise for her girls.

    Just be honest with her.
     
  11. vantage

    vantage Active Member

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    Ask her if she is still interested. If it has been a year she might have move on. Let her know that if she is not interested in them you intend to sell them. And ask what she is doing with her old set. Maybe you could split what she makes selling them.
     
  12. Ava Rose

    Ava Rose New Member

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    I think that if she already has bunkbeds you have no reason to give her bunkbeds. I think it would be weird on her part to sell her old ones and get free ones from you. That's just my opinion.

    I am always giving things away. Always! To the point that I sometimes feel guilty when I sell something. lol. But that is silly....you can do whatever you want with your stuff.

    Now, I know God will provide and does bless us in our acts of kindness. However, that does not mean it is God's will you give all your things away. I mean you can't just give your home or car away right? Now, don't think I am taking anything away from God's awesome power and love for us. I have been the recipient many many times. I do think that if you can give something to someone who needs it you should do it. Yet, in this situation it does not seem like a need. YOur friend does have beds for her kids. Sounds to me like she wants yours because they look more feminine. That is not a need.

    I am also all for random acts of kindness. So no one think I am being selfish or not relying on God. I just think that if it is yours you can do whatever you want with it. The hard part is that you already discussed this with your friend. So, if it were me I would say, "hey do you still need those bunkbeds..because if you don't the money from selling them would come in handy right now." That is honest and casual.
     
  13. Ava Rose

    Ava Rose New Member

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    Oh and another point...not sure if this relates or not. I have a friend at church that is always giving me clothes from her dd for my little dd. A few times she even gave me enough to cover an entire season! Some of the clothes even had tags on them. Anyway...if she decided to sell her dd's clothes because she needed the money I would not feel slighted. If she decided that someone else needed them more then me, I would not feel slighted. In fact, she gave a HUGE bag of clothes to another girl at church and told her just to give me my dd's size or what she didn't want. The girl she gave this bag too has a dh out of work. So, I don't feel slighted at all. In fact, I am going to give this lady clothes from my dd myself...instead of keeping them for a few years for my new baby.

    Ok...that was off the topic...point is...the girl at church ALWAYS gave me first choice of the clothes or all the clothes. This time...because I wasn't in church and because the one girl's dh is out of work...she gave them to someone else. Well, the clothes are hers...so if she sold them or gave me first choice or not...that's not my place to say or care. ya know?

    Point is...do what you want with your stuff. If someone needs something give it away...if someone just wants something you can give it or sell it depending on your own situation.

    Maybe instead of her taking your bunkbeds and selling the others you should have just switched a year ago instead of having them made.
     
  14. KristineIN

    KristineIN New Member

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    Just want to add, the gentleman that is making the bunk beds is doing it out of his love and kindness, he made our daughter a bed after we moved last summer. He makes furniture all of the time and when he offered, I felt I needed to give him something in return. This will be a treasured piece of furniture, they are our former neighbors and are like grandparents to our children. The bunk beds will actually be two stacking beds that our children can then pass down to their kids. That's why we are getting new bunk beds.
     
  15. Ava Rose

    Ava Rose New Member

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    Oh hey, I don't blame you for taking this guy up on his offer! I would have. I just commented in jest...I think I am alone in thinking your friend is not right for selling her old ones and taking yours for free. Not saying she is horrible..I mean if that was what was offered to her than why turn it down. I guess I am just saying she may not need them so you should not feel you need to give them.
     

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