so do you have to do foster care to adopt? I don't think we could even do foster care if we wanted to. We transfer every 3-4 years. And like right now, we only have a 2 bedroom house- not to mention 3 large dogs. If you've heard of military families doing foster care let me know- I mean that sincerely because I would like to talk to them and find out how to about it. We had actually talked about doing foster care before we moved here. But financially at that time, we needed me to go back to work full time. We're in a totally different financial place now so it's not out of the question.
WOW! for some reason I hadn't gotten any emails saying anyone had posted to this thread I started. When I came to check I was astonished at the response. I still don't know anything. Kind of waiting. Don't want to take a test for fear of it being negative...then again I really want to know either way. I talked to my Dr. at supper last night and she said just call the office and tell the girls there that she wants some blood work done and she will secretly tack on a pregnancy test. I really don't want anyone at church to know yet at least until I find out. And since everyone at the Dr. office goes to our church.....well we have to be kinda sneaky. Still feeling kinda queezy in am's and Oh My Lord, my breast are so sore...but that could also mean I am gonna start too. See how optimistic I am being. Oh I hate the waiting. Thank you all for your prayers. That is part of the reason that I came to see if anyone had posted because I could feel God's presence around me more. I knew my friends must be praying. That is what I like about this group of ladies......they are such great prayer warriors. Jeannie
I don't think you have to actually DO foster care to adopt through their system but we have just finished allt he paperwork and training and finally have our foster parent license and I know they give the foster parents first chance at the adoption. I haven't actually known anyone who did this because they move around so much, but our pastor was in the Navy for over 20 years and he knew some people that did. I think it was the ones that were stationed on land and had both parents home all the time. Also our license is transferable to any state that borders the state we live in (Missouri). So it might be something to check into. Hope this helps. Jeannie
That does help Jeannie, thank you. And still praying for you, either way God has and will bless you. I have been reminded of that a lot lately:angel: It's hard to remember when you want something so bad. I don't know who wants a baby more, dd or I lol. It probably wouldn't be as bad if dd didn't tell everyone we saw "I don't have any brothers or sisters but I wish I did!" Anyhow, keep us posted!
You don't have to be a foster parent to adopt but in our county you go through the same training program. Then if a foster child becomes available for adoption you are ready and have your homestudy done. A foster child's foster parents will be considered first for adoptions because they already have a history with you but sometimes the foster parents just aren't the right forever family for a child and that can be sad. I know for a while in our county if you told the social worker that you only wanted to adopt a newborn they would advise you to go somewhere else because they had so many people already waiting for babies. We don't get a lot of newborns in our county. Our Emily is the youngest foster child we ever had at 3 weeks old. Friends of ours got newborns straight out of the hospital. I know of three friends that were able to do that but that is rare. I don't want anyone to think you can become a foster parent and get a new baby. It just isn't likely to happen. But as I said some do get little ones. Bless any of you who try foster care. It is a hard job but it was my life for over 20 years and I wish we could still foster but Freddy says he is too old to do it anymore. Beth
We are just starting to talk about adoption. My husband wanted a vesectomy done, a year ago. Have the younger two 13 months apart was hard on us, still is. It is getting better though. I still feel something missing in our lives. I want another child, preferrable a boy. We have two girls now and one boy. I finally told DH how I felt and we agrees with me. We really don't want to have a baby/infant. Toddler and up would be better for us. After some reading and replies from posts, we are going to wait until our youngest turns 5 to start the process. At that time my husband would be back on shore duty. I also feel that my toddlers would have a hard time with it all. They won't understand. My youngest is very attached. Only this past week she has started to wean herself away from me. Waiting a few more years is the best thing for my family. I get excited when I find more clothes that my son cannot wear. If they are good, I pack them away. This year is going fast, and it will go fast when by husband is deployed. Before you know it, I will be posting about our new,older, addition to our family.
Beth we just recently received our license and we haven't been place a child yet. In a way I am anxious to get our first placement but just the same when that happens I know a family has been ripped apart. We decided to be foster parents because we wanted to give children a safe, Christian and healthy environment to thrive in. We are not in it to adopt...however if the right little one came through our home we would consider it. JEannie
Jeannie, That is the way we were too. We wanted more kids in the house but not to adopt. We just wanted to help them until they could go home again. That worked for several years. Then we got Bill. He was two at the time and so cross-eyed you couldn't see any white on the inside corners of his eyes. He is mentally handicapped also but was and is the happiest person you would ever want to meet. He came here at the age of two and by the time he was three the county knew he would be put up for adoption. His birth mom is mentally handicapped and legally blind. His birth father is a horrible person. Anyway even after much training the mom just couldn't remember to feed and bath the children. Yes there were two older than Bill. They were adopted away from here. One day Freddy and I had to go see the social worker about something and I said what are we going to do when they find a family for Bill and come and take him away. He said they aren't going to. You tell them. So when we got to their office I told the lady not to look for a family for him that we wanted to adopt him. She looked so funny and said Oh we already knew that. We could tell by the way you look at him. So we adopted him. We got Crystal four years later when she was three. When she was about 4 and a half she had been to a visit with her parents and came back and told us if her parents couldn't stop drinking and fighting she was just going to stay with us. It took us four years in all to be able to say she was ours forever but we stuck it out and adopted her when she was 7. We got Emily when she was only 3 weeks old. She lived in hell for the first three weeks of life. Or at least the days after she was brought home from the hospital. Neighbors finally called the police because they could hear the birth mom screaming at her to shut up and calling her an ugly hair lipped SOB. I am not trying to shock anyone here but that is what happens in the lives of children everyday. Some, like ours, get put into foster care. My husband who is retired from law enforcement could tell you about the ones who get left in the homes. The ones he had to go to the morgue and photograph for murder cases still haunt him. I agreed to take Emily in foster care and then found out we were distant cousins. We adopted her when she was two. Our last adoption was Bobby. He had lived with us when he was seven and had gone to an adoptive placement that he had arranged. He had asked a family at our church to adopt him and they wanted to so he went there. He lived with them for a while and then we found out he had been moved to another home. The first family said it just didn't work out. The second family said they wanted to adopt him too. He was in another county after he left us. He lived with the second family for five years and they never adopted him. I think he wouldn't agree to be adopted at first and later they weren't sure it was right for their family. Finally Social Services moved him to a group home about an hour from here. They didn't tell us but we found out during the summer when he came for a visit here with Crystal who is his sister. We had a family meeting and everyone agreed to ask him to join us and be adopted by us. We were able to pick him up for the next weekend and we weren't suppose to ask him right away because the man at the group home didn't think he was ready to make that decision. But during lunch on Sunday Crystal told him and he said that was what he had wanted for a long time. So we made some hurried up arrangements and adopted him. I tell people we never meant to adopt. It wasn't in our plans. I really believe when I make plans for my life God gets a good laugh. Praise God. He built this family and he holds it together. Praise God. That is our story, and we are sticking to it. Beth
I just wanted to let you all know that I took a test last tuesday and it was negative. But the we got a call for 4 foster kids this week. One was a 17 year old girl AND her 11 month old baby girl. Then two days later we got a call for a 3 week old baby and his 1 year old brother. So you see God answers prayers...not always in the way we want him to but he does answer them. Also I started today so it is a definate no go in the baby department for me and DH. But we are having fun with the babies. It is such a blessing to have little ones around. The 17 year old is quite the little mother. She takes very good care of her baby. She is adjusting very well. Thanks for everyones prayers. God bless you all. Jeannie
I know how excited you must have been to get the phone call with your first foster kids. I remember the way we felt and how hard it was when the first one left. You have so much to look forward to. It makes me wish we could do it all again but Freddy says we are done and to let younger couples foster now. By the way, our second foster child was a 17 year old girl. She didn't come with a baby but had her son while she lived with us and even though we never hear from her we still keep in touch with him. (He is grown now.) I would love to hear how things are going for you. Best of everything. Beth
Jeannie, I'm sorry it didn't work out the first way, since you would have been so happy! But you're right, God answers prayers in HIS way, which is for the best anyway! How exciting that you got your first Foster kids! How's it going with them all? Do you know how long you'll have them?
