So, DS who is 3.5 is supposed to start preschool next week. He's scheduled to go T/TH from 9-11:30. We have struggled to make much progress with potty training and even though he's "supposed" to be trained before going, the teachers are very relaxed and understand that kids go at their own pace. If a child has a BM or accident while at school, they just call the parent to come change them. They don't make a big deal out of it and they know and have a lot of experience with that, especially with the 3s class. So, my delima is whether or not I should pull him out. I've told him he cannot go unless he pees/poops in the potty. He was doing really well with peeing, but after 3 weeks of cleaning poopy undies, I put him in pull ups to save my sanity. At first he did well with still doing pee in the potty, but this last week he has gotten lazy and is beginning to use the pull up for pee, too. So, he's pretty much gone back to diapers full time. Ugh... I feel like I need to follow through on saying he can't go since he's not using the potty. On the other hand, it would really help me to have him in preschool because my 5 yo has his coop group on Tuesday and I have to stay with him. It would be nice to not have him in there with us as a distraction. On the plus side though, he is learning the material and partially participating in the class, too. He's gone with us the last couple of weeks and hasn't been THAT bad of a distraction. There are some toys in the room he plays with so he usually just does his own thing. I might consider letting him bring a couple of his own favorites, too. The other thing to consider is that if I do pull him out of preschool and keep him with me, then I won't have to leave the 5yo to go and pick the 3 yo up since the oldest has class until 12pm. So, it would cut out 20+ minutes of back and forth driving for me. Ugh...I just don't know what to do. I guess I'll talk to DH about it. I just needed a sounding board. Thanks!
I think it's important to follow through. But that's just my two-cents. Is it possible to enroll him in a few weeks if he changes his habits?
I agree on the follow through. I try so hard to be consistent and follow through on everything I say, whether it's threats because of their behavior or a positive promise that they have earned or just something I said I would do. I've seen with relative's kids how damaging it can be with a bunch of empty threats! That's a good idea to see if he can go in a few weeks. I'll have to call the director and see. They usually have a waiting list, so I'm not sure if they'll go for it or not. I put him back in undies today because he keeps peeing in his pull up. I pretty much told him it's HIS job to get HIS pee and poop in the potty and that I am not going to remind him or badger him anymore. I told him if he poops he's going to have to figure out a way to clean himself up and his undies because I'm not doing it. I will supervise and maybe assist a little. Oh this is just so frustrating!!
I feel your pain. My 3-going-on-4yo really took his time. I, too, was washing load after load of soiled undies. Finally, after trying EVERYthing I could think of, I took his underwear away. I did not give him a pull-up, either. I figured I might as well clean the floor as the laundry. Anyway, he did not understand when I explained it to him. Then, he sort of decided I "forgot" to give him new underwear. I said, Nope. You made BM in your underwear, you don't get to wear underwear (He has LOTS of role models - he knew none of US soiled our pants). Anyway, he was MORTIFIED. After a few hours, I let him wear underwear again. He still had a few accidents, but was now motivated in and 2-3 days, he did not have any more lack-of-motivation accidents - it was reduced to plain old 3yo-can't-make-it-even-tho-trying accidents. Now, about 6 mos later, he is consistently dry and clean, even overnight. I don't have any carpet - all wood and tile - so this was a viable option for me. Not that I thought it out. It was the act of a desperate woman.
It may actually be worth it to pay for a couple of week even if you don't send him (to keep him enrolled). Something to consider.
I'd not let him go, and then I'd have him go bare-bottom in the house. He already knows how to pee in the potty, he's just being lazy about it. And I'm betting he knows when he has to poop, too!
