Homeschool Girl Denied Access to College Due to Age

Perhaps it is the only college choice available. Many families are not able/willing to move for their child to attend college early and a 13 year old may be ready for college classes and not ready to live away from home.

I have been privileged to meet several kids who went to college full-time at early ages and thrived. A couple that I know of finished college in their mid to late teens and went on to highly selective, prestigious schools for grad school. Others used part-time college as an extended high school experience before going away to full-time college at typical or near-typical college age.

In my experience from meeting some of these kids and their parents, they are not pushed. The parents are scrambling desperately to keep up, provide the intellectual stimulation the kids need, and keep some balance in the rest of their lives.

We face this very issue with our daughter. We had an evaluation done when she was 8 to try and figure out some stuff with her. Despite only homeschooling thru a 4th grade math book, she tested the same as the average 2nd year college student in math. Despite never learning algebra, she was solving multiple equations with multiple unknowns. We were advised to start conversations with our local university within the next year or so. We have found other avenues, online and on our own - so far. She is 11 now. She craved some in person learning with others learning with her and discussing the things she loves. We tried a rigorous charter high school half-time, but even though she was only 10 last fall when she started, it was not enough. She's finishing the year with her straight 'A's. She worked well with the kids who were 14-17 years old in her class and was well-liked. She still had her peer group of friends at or near her age for playdates. We're homeschooling again full-time now. She's planning on teaching a math circle for homeschoolers and we're planning lots of fun independent research projects. The reality is that she wants to discuss and share her learning and she may need to find college level kids to do it.

We'll put off college classes as long as possible. We've found some pretty good online alternatives. But at some point we may have to jump into this crazy place of early college as well. I know that people will talk and say we push her. They have no idea. They don't see how she lights up and bounces up and down with joy when she has concepts to really dig deep into. They don't see how much she wants to bounce ideas off of others and feel understood. They don't see that she still plays with her friends, plays sports, plays music, plays with the dogs, hangs out and watches tv or plays video games, and still has time to zoom through rigorous studies.

After hearing a few comments from other homeschoolers implying we must do school all day long to move so far ahead, I sat down and recorded time spent on 'school' for a couple months last year when we homeschooled full-time. Including art projects and PE and online classes, we averaged 2 to 2.5 hours a day.

 

I think that the parents are the ones who should decide.
I know my children the best and I am willing to pay enough attention to make sure that they get appropriate material when they are ready for it.
That is the point of homeschooling and being homeschoolers isn't it. Educational freedom and a parents right (and responsibility) to choose?
It doesn't really matter (in general, specifically it matters very much) if the parents are "pushing" this kid or not...THEY have the right to make decisions for thier child.

That being said...I took a college class between my sophmore and jr. year of high school...because I was sooooo bored and threatening to quit school. What I learned was
1. I was capable of doing college level work.
2. I was not ready for the social aspects as the boys paid too much attention to me and the girls NONE.
3. I better learn to type. (it was a long time ago. lol)

I stayed in school...stayed bored...graduated with my class...and didn't go to college because I "hated" school...right decision? who knows.

 

Speaking from experience, I wish nobody would have held me back. I earned enough credits to graduate after 3 years of high school. I begged to start college early and was not allowed by parents or the high school administration. I tested at a college level in all areas in grade school I began taking SATs in 5th grade. I was at a peaked interest level and everyone in my life that was making decisions for me wanted to "keep me at the same level as my peers". Because of that stifling, I lost my desire to dig deep and explore and replaced it with complacency.

Still having not read the article, if this girl is sincerely ready for college level material and credits, by all means don't keep her from achieving all she can. Time wasted might be the least of her concerns later if it is coupled with frustration and regression.

 

When I was in community college, there were 14 year old twin sisters attending. They were taking English and another course because they went as far as they could at home. Although they were young and somewhat quiet, they were also very accepted by the other teens and adults. They were dropped off by the mom and didn't roam the college. They were also picked up and brought back to the college if they had a significant amount of time between classes.

 

So we sit and fuss about parents who "push" their kids, and how "terrible" that is. Isn't it just as bad to intentionally hold a child back? I know Carl is kicking himself with Rachael. He teaches computer classes to middle/high school homeschooled kids in the evenings. Rachael was really interested at age ten, and he felt she wasn't academically "ready" to keep up with the class. Now, she's no longer interested. And that's just a "little" thing. One of the main reasons of hs'ing is to allow a kid to learn at his/her own pace, to avoid "one size fits all" education. So why do we criticize parents whose child is most definately "outside the box"?

 

Maybe the best fit for her right now would be an online college, since she is so young. If she is academically ready, and willing to do the work, then thats fine. But sadly in this world you don't JUST have to worry about her. You have to worry about others as well. Not just how they will treat her, or if they will have friends or not. Unfortunatly you might have to worry about her safety as well.

I don't know about anyone else, but if it were my 13 year old daughter I would consider her safety first. Someone would accompany her to classes and be there with her until she was older or able to do it on her own. I would in no way shape or form want to hold her back or push her forward if she wasn't ready, I think special consideration would be needed for s student that young. Yes, there are adults there, but not all adults can be trusted. JMO

 

Excellent point, Jackie! I didn't think of it that way.

 

Amen!

I'm also confused about those who say they won't let thier child graduate until 18. Isn't that a little arbitrary? I mean, that's not even the way it works in public school. I graduated from HS at 17 and was months into college (900 miles away from home) before turning 18. I didn't skip a grade or anything, either.

While I think this young girl is possibly being held back by similarly arbitrary rules, there's likely little that the parents can do about it. So, do you sit around and gripe? No. Get her enrolled in some online classes or find other outlets. I don't agree that she's "gone as far as she can go at home." There are two guys in my cohort at school who are doing independent studies to make up gap hours. That's a concept a 13 year old can explore easily. Just pick a topic, then dig as deep into that topic as possible. If nothing else, she can turn around and teach her mom and dad about the topic.

 

LOL, that was me Perhaps it is a bit arbitrary, but considering my son will turn 18 in February of his 12th grade year he will be 18. I don't want him to ever skip a grade. I believe in going broad and deep as well as advancement. So if he is ready for high school subjects in grade 5 that is fine. There is no shortage of things to learn and I want all 13 years to teach him or guide his learning. To me graduating from high school is a rite of passage to adulthood. Now it could be that my son will change my mind in the future, but for now that is how I see it.

 

We're debating on letting Rachael graduate a year early. Though the verdict is still out. I need to really sit down and look at what credits she has, and what she'll have by the end of next year. I'd like to see her spend what would traditionally be her "senior year" somewhere overseas with some mission organization. But we'll see! (Oh, and Rachael doesn't know we're considering this, and her input would be taken into consideration!)

 

As a college English professor, I would be uncomfortable with a child this young in my class. Often we deal with "adult" themes, and no matter how brilliant a 13 yr old may be, she is still a child. I would find myself either holding back to prevent exposure to her, which would be detrimental to the rest of the class, or smashing what little is left of her innocence, which is not my place in the world. As a professor, i don't know someone's MOM calling me about the content of the class if she doesn't like it. That is why I am a professor and not a middle school teacher.

If she wants college credit, have her take the clep exams, then take colleges classes when she it 15-16 or more. Those two years make a HUGE difference.

 

That's a point I never thought of, Gwenny. I could see that to be so in perhaps English, but not in Math.

 

I am assuming the parents are decent parents and have taken everything into account. Most likely, they are not walking into this blindly.

 

Agreed with both points, Jackie. I hadn't thought of it from a teacher's pov. But again, this really only applies to certain humanities and LA.

 

That is true, but then there is still the general exposure to a more adult audience and the conversations before and after class. Not everyone checks their mouth at the door. We've decided that we will have our ds take CLEP exams until he is about 15 1/2 - then that summer he can start taking a class or two at the local college. My son is 13 now, and there are some subjects that I discuss in class that I know he is just too young for many of those readings and discussions.

 

I read Lolita for my college English class. I would even hate to see Rachael reading that one, lol!

 

I read Catcher in the Rye in a Freshan English class.... High school freshman. I asked over and over if I could stop reading it because it was just so horrible and nasty. I knew that it was not a book that I should be reading and it hurt my heart to do so. I was 13/14 years old. And not in college. So, really, trying to keep certain things out of a child's mind is not always possible. This is where a faith in the Lord's guidance and then protection are very important.

 

Funny thing I just realized:

I was a hs Freshman at 13. I could have taken college class... on a college campus... as a Freshman. They do the same thing in the city where I live now. They are "vo-tech" classes, but taken with college-aged students. E.g. you can take culinary arts courses or auto-mechanics courses, but they are the same classes the rest of the community college students are taking.

So... how is this any different?

 

At the place I was thinking of sending Rachael to, you have to interview if you're not a Junior or Senior. But those are GRADE designations, not AGE. What if I had a 12yo Senior?

 

Gwenny....I totally agree!

Some schools in my area had the option of taking college credit classes...however the classes were made up of all kids. Meaning...no college kids...just the high school kids. All the kids who qualified from all the schools in the area, had the class together. It was part of an inner city program...so I'm sure that was why. Now, there is also the option of taking college classes while in high school...but you had to be junior.

I am NEVER for holding a child back academically. However, I am for holding a child back due to maturity. My 12 year old is fully aware of sex and laughed during an Everybody Loves Raymond rerun when there was a sex comment. No, she did NOT just laugh...she did understand it. But, just because she understood it, didn't mean I can now expose her to all sexual humor. In fact, the girl dvrs that show. I go through and delete any show with a sexual theme. I also restrict what she sees on Disney and at the movies. She is just too young. maybe that is a bad example...but I hope the meaning comes through. No? lol. Okay. lol.

Okay...here's another one...my 12 year old can read ANYTHING. She loves to read. She has read so many books above her age level that she finds Percy Jackson books interesting but kiddie. She read a historical romance novel...about WW2...no sex or even kissing..just a cutesy little love letter relationship...but the book was solid in history and time period. She loved it. Yet, I am unwilling to allow her to read books that I find too adult or would expose her too much. She is 12. I have a book about the middle east but it went into detail about a few themes, I felt were better to hold off on for her.

so, as Gwenny mentioned...some material is still off limits no matter how smart you are.

Unless my child could take online college math classes or things of that nature, I would not allow her to enter college until 16. As a christian, it is my job to protect her mind. I cannot do that if she is hoping around a college campus. Geesh, i don't even like her watching a lot of the teen shows due to content. lol

I say there are plenty of ways to stimulate a child's education if they are young and ready to graduate. Or you have the option of online college classes...so the child can take a foriegn lang or math.