WE are going through some financial stuff again, our credit card bill is about $900, and we have a couple other bills like propane and a stove repair bill. We have no extra at the end of the pay period, so i asked my dh if he would consider working as much overtime as possible for 3 weeks to get that stuff paid off, bc right now they actually have overtime, but it wont last that much longer. He has agreed, and he plans on working 6 days a week, 12 hour days, which is 72 hrs/week! It will start now and be done July 18th. It is his day shift, so that is 6am to 6pm. I have told him i will try to pick up whatever stuff that he normally does,like the trash and the lawn mowing, anything else he needs. He doesnt look forward to this, it will be 3 days on, 1 day off, 5 days on, 1 day off, 7 days on, 1 day off, 5 days on, 1 day off, then he'll be dont. Im trying to be helpful, doing anything to help him get through the 3 weeks. I feel bad for him as well, but i am trying to look at it like a sacrifice that is very short but will help us out so much! He should make about $2000 extra for those 3 weeks of overtime. So we will have enough to pay off it all and have some extra to put in an emergency fund. so he did agree, but i pushed some, saying if i could do it i would but i dont have a job, and i cant get anything like that for 3 weeks. i say we should take advantage of over time while we can, bc only 3 months ago, they were talking about cutting hours so they wouldnt have to lay off. I hate to push, but he just doesnt like to work extra, which i totally understand, bc i hate it when hes gone more. we miss him so much, and i have literally no help for 3 weeks, but i will survive, and im just wondering, have you girls ever convinced your dh to do something like this? i feel bad, he will have to work so much, but we really need to get stuff paid off, and this is the only way to get it done. our credit card interest is so high, that we need it paid off as soon as possible, am i a horrible wife??
How does your husband feel about being pushed to work longer hours? Did he agree because he is fine with it or did he agree because he had to agree? ...and I do not think you are a horrible wife.
I wouldn't feel bad about it. This is a blessing if you ask me, you are right to take advantage of this. When we owned a business my dh didn't pay the sales tax for like a year, we had a lein put of our accounts...I made my dh sell his prized 1969 Plymouth Roadrunner ( his dream car) to pay the taxes. We had zero left from that car sale after we paid the taxes. He had to be a big boy and step up. 5 years later I still think of that car but its because I'm soooo glad we had something to sell that would cover that bill or we would have lost our house ( it was a $10,000.00 bill!!!). It may suck now but later on he'll thank you for having him do this.
I don't think you are a horrible wife at all! It sounds like you are watching out for your entire family. I'm sorry to hear that dh has to work long hard hours and that you guys are struggling right now. I'm guessing you feel guilty. I've felt like that before. When my hubby worked for his former employer he worked long hours and traveled a ton for not that great of pay. We almost went broke when we had some medical bills to cover from my dd and me. My hubby's former employer also had horrible insurance and we didn't understand that until all the bills came rolling in and piled up. Anywho, a couple months after the bills piled up a wonderful job opportunity with a great company came along. This company was going to pay dh more, require less hours, no travel, great insurance and a nice vacation package! Dh felt the position was actually a step down from what he was doing though. I pushed dh to take it. He did. I felt guilty then and sometimes I still feel guilty about that. Although, everything has worked out pretty well since then! Dh sometimes misses his old job, but he deals with it by volunteering for committees and boards besides running marathons. When I feel guilty I try to remember that I was looking out for the best interest of my family. I wish you and your family all the best!
Well... here is my husbands take on things like this.... he would rather work every second of over time they offer and work LOTS of side jobs so that I can stay home with the kids. He would kill himself working before he would let me set foot out the door looking for work. I know not every man is this devoted.. but I am super thankful that mine is! I dont' think it is asking too much for him to pull some overtime.. esp when the other option would be for you to go out for work.
I think it is great he can get OT! We are in the same boat but owe WAY more credit card debt that that. I wish we only owed $900. I'm not even going to say what it is but dh and I did come up with a 5 year plan and have vowed not to charge anything at all anymore. My dh is self employed and his business is real slow. He took it upon himself to find extra work so now he is working about 3 nights a week from 7pm - 7am for a friends pest control company foggin gneighborhoods for mosquitos. He worked last night as a matter of fact and I hate it so much and he hates the hours but he has to do what he has to do. We are hoping that after this harsh summer heats goes away in about 3 months or so he will be able to pick up a different job during the day.
I also push for dh to work overtime when it's offered. He doesn't really appreciate working overtime, but he does it because I ask. He knows that I'm thinking about what is best for the whole family. You aren't a bad wife. You're trying to get bills paid off. It's not like you spent a ton of money on something frivolous, or have gambling debts to pay. You've hit some financial hardships (very common in the current economy) & you're taking advantage of an opportunity to get caught up. There's nothing for you to feel guilty about.
I think you are a wonderful helpmate to your husband. This is the perfect example of 2 becoming 1 and working together. I think if you sat back and did not try to contribute to the solution, that is what would make you a rotten wife. I think you have done great!
This is a temporary arrangement. Only a few weeks, then back to normal. A family can adjust for that small amount of time, but I wouldn't want it done on a regular basis. As far as OT in general, you have to decide whether the extra money is worth not having him with the family. And that's a decision each couple has to make individually. What's fine for one will not be for another.
Second That! You are not horrible we have been through that many times not to get out of debt but to put food on the table. Please remember that just because you don't produce $$ doesn't mean you aren't valuable, your value is in his peace of mind knowing he has a loving home for his children and a secure place to come and be loved. Not to mention clean skivvies!
I have a suggestion that might help. We ran into some problems with some debt credit and other wise over $3,000. DH's hours were cut and there was no way to pick up the slack anywhere. So I starated major cleaning of the house. I went through every room and the garage and if it didn't get used it got sold. Yard sales, craigslist, etc. We do this every year (we own a hauling buisness where we remove unwanted items for people and resale them or donate them depending) We so far this summer alone made over $1,000 in 3 weeks. Maybe try going through old clothing, toys, books, cookware, dishes, start weeding stuff out and selling it you may not make alot buy you can put some money back or pay off some bills. Especially kids stuff, then you'll have room for that dreaded christmas shopping season...GL I don't think it was wrong for you to ask but I think if he didn't want to do it he needs to say so. So just ask again and verify that he is okay with it. Also try cutting out some of the not so needed grocery items and eating out you can save tons there.
I think you are very wise and a great wife. I also think in 3 weeks he will be VERY grateful to you for suggesting it. I am also sure he knows it's the right thing but just didn't look forward to it. Just be very kind to him and understanding over the next 3 weeks.
It's nice that your dh is willing to work it. It's very temporary and net quite a bit of money that can help the household. My boys hired my dh as an employee with their lawn care business again this summer. My dh also hauls firewood in the fall for extra money. I have been actively looking for a job but we live one hour away, 50 miles from any place bigger than where we live. Jobs around here are slim pickins and are awarded to family and friends. They don't really look at qualifications, lots of nepotism.
I think you are a very wise women.. and he will see it once the bills are done. Now who in there right mind wants to work overtime not to many but they do it for there family. Yes he might be tired it's long hours but it's only for 3 weeks. He will be fine and don't make yourself feel bad about it. He will get over it and you are doing a wonderful thing for your family. Just do what you all can for each other and it always works out.
When he is done with his overtime make a pamper daddy day. Let him lie about and serve him his food and drinks. Make sure he knows you really do thank him for it.
Thanks girls, you really made me feel better! I think he totally understands the need, just doesnt want to do the extra work, which who can blame him, it is hard work! I am going to baby sit for my friend about 5 days those 3 weeks, and we are selling our play fort bc the kids dont use it, so i told him he can have $300 of that to buy hunting clothes if he wants. I have cut back in every way i can on groceries etc. We never eat out, our eating out in the last 6 months has been a casey's pizza, lol. I have tried selling any unneeded clothes and other items. I did finally buy new under wear and a cheap pj, but that was for him, lol! It was from walmart, so it wasnt extravagant, but cute and gave him a bit of spice at night, lol. His other complaint was that our sex life would be nonexistant,lol, bc the kids have been going to bed later, but i promised to start putting them to bed at 8pm, even though it is still light out, lol, so he can get a little relaxation, if you know what i mean, lol! I also am secretly trying to work it so that i have a few hundred left at the end, he can use for blow money or put back for the new bow (think deer hunting, lol) that he wants. anyways, thanks for the lift, i needed it after hashing it out with him. i felt like i was asking too much maybe, or pushing him a bit, but even he has said the overtime wont be here that long, and we should take advantage of it, so he gets it. im so glad i have you girls you really are a great group of friends, and im blessed to have you all!
