It's been beautiful these past couple of days so I have been taking the kids to park. Couldn't get over the name calling i've heard parents call their kids. Yes parents calling their kids. "Hey you brat get over here" "I'm talking to you f** moron" :shock: When did it become norm for parents to speak to their children like garbage? I was so looking forward to going to this new park everyday but i don't think my heart can take it.
That's so sad. It seems that parents and kids are getting more and more disconnected. At the bbq we were at, there was a single father there who kept telling his daughter he couldn't wait until he could get rid of her at 5 when her mom picked her up. Sadly, children seem like nothing more than mere annoyances for many parents.
I used to live next to a lady that called her 3 yo a f***ing B@****d, I called her on it once too. She never spoke to me again! I'm sorry but there just isn't an excuse for calling your child names unless it's "punkin', munchkin, sweetie, darling," or other appropriate name. I think it's awful how parents treat their children, I mean really no one told you you HAD to have children.
Those poor kids! I've heard parents calling kids brat, but never anything worse. I guess I've just been lucky ;(
That makes me sick to my stomach. I thought it was bad enough seeing what some of hte parents at the local school had on their tee shirts when they came to pick up their children, but at least that was just words on a shirt. To actually call you child those words makes me sick.
I'm usually pretty mellow about other people's parenting practices, but this is one issue that would have me finding another park to play at. Or at least, trying to find a time of day when these particular people aren't around. I don't think it's a new problem, either. I think sadly it's a very, very old problem. My grandmother used to call my mother terrible ridiculous names, when she was a little girl (like "slut"!). So my mother decided she'd only call me names that I'd "earned", which I suppose was a slight improvement, though no one likes being called a sneak and a liar. I don't call my own children any names (except "sweetie"), but I have used the word "stupid" to describe certain of their actions... which is unacceptable to a friend of mine, who doesn't allow that word to even cross her family's lips. Luckily she still lets her children play with mine!
Thats terrible. It makes me very sad to even think about it. I look at some kids and they look so unkempt, and the parents just look like they don't even care. it's so sad.
I even had a friend comment on how "nice" I was to my children! I didn't really get why she would point that out until I heard how she talked to her nephews! she literally got in his face and yelled, dont interupt when grown ups are talking! then she looked at me and, right in front of the child,said, he's so rude!. well, this is the kind of friend I can be honest with so I said, "would you have yelled at an adult like that?" or called him names? She really had no idea you should treat children nicely. she thought you had to be mean to teach them a lesson! how sad.
Wow...and I thought this would be about kids calling other kids names. Geesh...who needs bullies when some have parents, right? YIKES.
This is what I grew up with and it leaves such deep scars. I treat my children the same way I want to be treated, with respect. That doesn't mean they don't get restrictions. They have their bounderies and if those are crossed there are consequences. Just like in life, if you do wrong you suffer the consequences, or make it right. Really!!!! I wish I could go up to the parent doing this and treat them the way they just treated their child. I would probably face charges for violating their rights. It's a shame they can't see they are violating their own children.
I agree it's abuse. How horrible. I know I've said things I am not proud of...but nothing like that. That is a different category altogether.
I can only imagine the type of parents these children will become in the future. Hopefully they remember how it felt and choose to be better parents to their children.
Baby steps! Most people start parenthood wanting to be better parents than their own parents. But depending on where they start from, and how successful they are, that can be a long road. Years ago I knew a woman who was horribly abused as a child and spent a good portion of her young life in and out of foster homes. When she had children, she vowed that she would never lay a hand on them in anger. She had to lock herself in the bathroom sometimes, but she kept that vow. However, she could sure swear a blue streak! And so could her babies, once they were old enough to speak. But ugly language aside - she was a loving parent in a rough and tumble kind of way, and her girls were sweet. Social services were working closely with that family, and that helped a lot, too. And I still think she was a better mom than one upper class family I babysat for. Walking into their house, you'd never even know they had children. They either ignored them, or treated them like toys. They'd have classy parties and think it was funny to give the kids apple juice in a beer bottle (something that would have horrified my friend, who's seen too many alcoholics in her life). These two children were not kind to each other, and the little boy would throw scary tantrums when he got angry - throwing dishes at his sister and actually trying to hurt her. They moved away, but I sometimes think about them and wonder where they are now. I'd rather see a scruffy child who is loved unconditionally, than a well-groomed one with nice language, who is treated meanly - and who learns to treat others the same.
I have seen that alot lately too, its so sad and what I think it is, is parents want to act and be friends to there kids and not parents.
My mom came from a home where her father beat her and her siblings and then molested them for years. She vowed to do better with her children and when she met my dad they fell in love and got married during their senior year of high school. A few years into their marriage he began hitting her. It got worse over the next 16 years, but he never hit me or my siblings. My mom did the best she could with us. We got spanked, she felt that was better than what had happened to her as a child, but she never called us names. My dad would yell at us and tell us we were stupid and how much he wished we weren't here (there are 4 of us). One of the things that to this day that I still remember is when my mom asked my to go sweep the back patio (I think I was 8 or 9) so I took the broom and started sweeping. My dad came out and ripped the broom from my hand and told me I was stupid because I was sweeping like a "girl". That hurt so bad, and I know it wasn't the worst thing he ever said to me, but it made me feel like girls were unworthy. For what I don't know. The bright side is my mom finally grew a backbone and told him to change or she was leaving. He knew she was serious and it scared him to death. He went to counseling and sought the Lord for help. He now has a very personal relationship with the Lord and he is so sensitive and sweet. He is NOT even close to how he used to be. I actually have a relationship with him that is good. Words that parents say to their children really do effect the way they turn out. I turned out fine (I think ), but I know that if it weren't for my mom I would have turned out alot different. It really it child abuse, and I have done so much better than my dad. My dh knows my past and he is extra sensitive about the way he treats me and the kids.
