So I am probably worried about nothing, but it seems like so many people who hs have kids who are bored in ps because they are gifted. My dd is still quite young (she'll be 4 in Jan.) so I might not need to be concerned but she does not appear to be one of the academically gifted types. She only knows her numbers to 4 and can only recognize 2 letters of the alphabet. She has been diagnosed with a language processing disorder and gets speech 1x/week at ps. I guess my question is do any of you have students who are not gifted but just average or perhaps a bit behind and how do you know that you are not shortchanging their education?
I have three children. My oldest might be "gifted", but she might just be a really smart kid. My youngest does fine in math and reading, but loves to do electronic-type stuff. My middle one is...my middle one, lol! She is twelve, and still spells like a second grader. We manage math, but she can have it wonderfully one day and not at all the next. She does pretty well in language (grammar). I think she has some kind of disability, due to her inability to spell correctly. My background is special ed, and her problem is NOT "laziness", or not having been taught. It's beyond that, believe me! Do I think public school would better meet her needs? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! I truely believe that she would have gotten lost in the shuffle. Her grades in ALL subjects would have suffered, and it would have had its toll on her self-esteem. Even my mil, who knows for a fact that ALL homeschooled kids are social misfits :roll:, told me one day that's it's probably better I teach Faythe at home because she "needs the one-on-one". If she doesn't get something, I can continue working on it until she does. She doesn't have to "move on" when she's not ready, just because the teacher has to get through to the next subject. When she has a melt-down, I can allow her to break and regroup, to where she can go on. That can't happen in a "real" school.
My girls are beautiful, wonderful, polite, friendly, helpful, trustworthy, kind, and any number of other great things, but gifted in school work? No. They do average work in most subjects. This is our third year homeschooling and they are in 10th and 5th grades. Each year I think they gain some ground but as long as they do their best I am happy and proud of them.
I have one natural student and one struggling student. Homeschooling has enabled me to customize thier education. I feel certain that my struggler who is now seven would still be sounding out three letter words in that painfully slow beginner way if he'd been in public school. He is smart; he would have faked it, and his reading problem may not have been caught right away. I say this because he could hear a story once and then recite it back almost word for word, turning the page at the right spot. IMO, I think homeschooling is even more benefical for the strugglers than for the excellers. The comparisions that go on with other kids is really bad for the struggler. A child who is getting a slower start than the others may start to think that something is wrong with her, because she isn't getting it as fast as the others. Once a child decides that he/she is "dumb", they are doomed academically.
My oldest is not even close to being gifted. He was two levels behind in reading when I brought him home. He is now reading at the level he should be in at public school. My middle child also has a language processing disorder (CAPD). She was in a public preschool with an IEP until we moved to Louisiana. I started her in K this year. And I fully believe she would not have made the same progress at school that we have made at home with her reading abilities.
This is exactly how I feel about my dd10. I needed to be reminded of it today. (Thanks, Jackie!!). My dd has been diagnosed with a visual perception deficit and a written language disorder (though not anything specific, I strongly suspect dyslexia). I can't imagine what she would go through in a regular classroom.
Your child will be ahead of public schoolers eventually. I do not advertise this, but my dd was hearing impaired when she was younger. She has an auditory processing disorder. When she was 4, she knew none of the stuff your child knows now. She is 12 now and tests at 99.9th percentile overall. This is because the quality of the education at home is so superior to anything she got in public school. We concentrated on the basic skills and left the extras like history as frosting on the cake. We still did stuff like listened to Story of the World and watched Magic School Bus. We even did Considering God's Creation over a 3 yr period of time (12 lessons a year). But our main focus was basic skills. We had a heavy phonics based program. I used Spelling Workout which is phonics based. We used a computer program called Earobics which is specifically for processing disorders, and seemed to focus on auditory processing. We just started a program called Flash Sequence. We do not follow a boxed reading program, but I have been known to do the Spectrum Reading workbooks for checking up on comprehension. My dd's reading skills took a great big leap the year I was pregnant and sick and had little time for anything. She was told she could read or play educational games or watch educational TV. She was not allowed to just watch cartoons or play video games, etc. This was the year I had dreaded the ITBS scores thinking for sure she would have dropped. She started homeschooling around 30-40th percentile. By this point, she was up to 70's percentile in reading and higher in others. I thought for sure she was going to drop. Instead, her reading score went up to 90 percentile and all her other scores were at 99th percentile. So basically, letting her get bored enough to pick up books she just enjoys and reads worked. I did not pick the books. I did buy lots of books I thought she would enjoy to read. This may have been the year she read all the Narnia books. She may have gone through the Little House on the Prairie books after that. This was a girl who started 3rd grade struggling with Junie B Jones (books that I do not recommend, it has horrible grammar and spelling). I would not be worried at all about where your child is now, but just keep things at her level, and low pressure, and fun. When she enjoys reading, she will start doing it. She will likely have a set back and need to be read to, then just do it. She will return to reading eventually. The best thing ever, I think, is books on tape. We listen to them in the car. Don't let curriculum control you, you make it work for you.
I don't really think I would call either of mine gifted. My dd is 5 and doing higher grade work but ONLY because she likes work and wanted to start homeschooling when ds did. She's just the natural learner. My ds is the struggler. He has always shown skill with puzzles and 3d things, as well as video games, but academically, sometimes we have to go over and over some things. I don't know what it is, if it's his age or attention span or if there's something there. I do know that in public school (which he did go to for 1/2 a year of kinder.) that he was struggling and falling behind quickly. I know that here at least I can repeat concepts or attempt different approaches until something sticks or I find what works. That is something he wouldn't get in public schools.
In our house..nobody is gifted. My oldest dd is dyslexic (we found out last year..thank god for our mentor teacher) and has struggled her whole school career. My youngest dd..she's bright, she doesn't really have to struggle to get the concept of things. For us it works to home school, my oldest can take her time learning concepts, and it's a no pressure situation. My other daughter can go as fast as she wants..there's nothing to slow her down if she so chooses. Hmsing..is for any family who needs it.
Sahmof2, my children probably wouldn't win the national spelling bee, play an instument expertly or become a chemical scientist. But they are gifted. All children are gifted. Each child has unique gifts they are blessed with. I believe we help our children to discover these gifts and how they can help others with it. Not to compare to others and feel lacking. Education, in my opinion, goes beyond scholastics, books, and grades. We teach them ethics, integrity, compassion and God. (How can you give grades in that?) Hopefully, I have not shortchanged them in that education.
The beauty of homeschooling, is that each child (gifted, average, or struggling) gets a personally tailored education. They get to move at their own pace. There's no waiting for the rest of the class to catch up, and there's no falling behond the rest of the class. They can take as long as they need to master a concept and move on when THEY'RE ready, not when the district says they should. The material can be presented, reviewed, and practiced in a variety of ways: hands-on projects, experiments, manipulatives, videos, games, whatever works best for that student, instead of just textbooks & worksheets. With an education that is tailored to their abilities, interests, and needs they won't be short-changed. Don't compare her to other kids her age, compare her to where she was a year ago, or a few months ago. As long as she makes progress, it doesn't matter if she's exactly where the majority of same-age peers are. Also, keep in mind that you may not have found her gift yet. In a few years, you might find out that she's a Science whiz or a huge History buff. Reading & Math are the 2 areas schools use when testing for the gifted program, but that doesn't mean they are the only areas a child can be gifted in. When it comes down to the very basics, educating any child is the same, regardless of where they are academically. Give them work that's at their level. Let them work at their pace, not yours. Help when they need help, and stand back & watch when they don't need help. Allow them to work in the way they work best. Allow & encourage them to follow their interests. Most importantly, though, support them & don't compare them to others. Education is not a race they're trying to win. It's a lifelong journey. Our biggest goal should be making sure they know how to learn & enjoy learning. If we can instill the love of learning & the ability to learn effectively, the rest will take care of itself.
Hoe refreshinmg this thread is! It seemed to me that everyone has been saying their kid is gifted, bored in school because they're gifted, or not challenged in school because they're gifted! I'm sorry, but that's how it sounds. How nice to hear there are more nice, regular, doing what they need to do kids on this board than I thought there were!
First, I have to get this off my chest! Take a breath and repeat this to yourself several times a day "she's only 4, relax, she's only 4, let her be a little kid, she'll be fine, she's only 4" OK... I feel better. just want to say that "gifted" kids are nice and regular too As a mom of an 11 yr. old ds who was deemed "gifted" by our public school district and went into the gifted school in 1st grade I can tell you that it's just another label for kids. I don't walk around telling people my son is gifted, ever, never. In public school that was very important for keeping up the image BLECHH!:roll: hated that. From my experience, "gifted" usually means they have really strong talents in one or maybe a few areas. My son's area is math -God just happened to give him a brain where at a very early age he could do calculations in his head that I would need a calculator for. BUT this did not help him when it came time to learn long division - it was a tearfest galore trying to teach him that - his brain wasn't wired that way. He is a voracious reader but writing anything also (used to) become a tearfest- he's much improved in that area but still hates it. He can do calculations in his head but is truly an absent minded professor and organizational skills are lacking, etc. so what I'm trying to say is don't get hung up on "gifted" or "not gifted" It's sounds cliche and sort of "Oprahish" but I really think every kid has their own unique gifts -you cannot compare them. I will echo another poster who said homeschooling is the best place for a "gifted" kid. My son was in a classroom of gifted kids but in 3rd grade he was still doing multiplication tables (which he had learned 2 years before) but some of the other "gifted" kids hadn't learned them yet ..so as it always is in public school, you just have to wait for everyone else to catch up and waste your time doing things you already know GRR:evil: (huge pet peeve of mine) With homeschooling that disappears....my son is free to do algebra at his own pace (fast or slow) and he loves it. I will also add that while my son may be considered "gifted" by some school district he is also on the autism spectrum so the social deficiencies that brings sort of evens out the giftedness in any area -he's just another kid trying to grow up and become a functioning adult like everybody else. Jane
I believe, with all my heart, that EVERY child is "gifted". It's just that with some children, finding and developing the areas of giftedness are much easier than others. With homeschooling, we can work more on doing that with our...more challenging...children!
I'm with Jackie--every child is gifted. Some have stronger areas than others, but even if academics is not their area, they have other strengths that are just as important. My son is very strong in his academics, but he is still "nice" and "regular", just has an area of strength that he was born with. My niece is not strong in academics, but she has a wonderful ear for music. My friend's son struggles all the time in school but is fabulous at art. All of these are equal gifts in my eyes!
I've felt that way some, too, Becky!! My ds did start out in ps, but wasn't bored. He was over-looked and lost in the crowd. I didn't have anyone reading at 3 or 4 (I didn't even attempt it.). I don't have one who will likely score the next great invention. I think all my kids are average (as far as IQ's go), but they all have their strengths and weaknesses. And that's OK. My mom (former ps teacher) used to have a poster on her wall that said "Average is OK!" The world is made up of average people. They are the ones who know how to work to get what they want/need.
I wanted to share things from my perspective as an adult with ADD and a learning disability who was homeschooled as a child. I did not read till the summer between 5th and 6th grade (though my younger sister by two years was reading at 4 years old). My mom was very patient with me and worked with me at my own pace. (which was often very slow). She encouraged me to press on but she didn't push me to do more than I was capable of. She did have me tested, but only one year. She always said that because she was working with me one on one she didn't see the need for tests because she knew where I was at. I was not diagnosed with anything as a child but she always knew there was something "not quite right". When I was diagnosed later with ADD, the psychologist told me I was very fortunate to have been homeschooled. She worked with kids in the public schools daily and she said that most of them don't make it. They either drop out or flunk out. She told me that Public schools simply are not equipped to handle kids that are not average. Anyway, I think I turned out alright! By the way, I grew up in a family with a couple of average kids and a couple of gifted kids. My mom always said she didn't treat us all the same because we weren't all the same.
I also believe that all children are gifted in some area. At the same time, Ems isn't ahead in her studies because she is gifted but because she is homeschooled. She has the opportunity to move ahead faster because she is learning at a faster pace than if she was in public school..
Thank you all so much for your wonderful and thoughtful replies! It makes me feel better to know that there are other families where academics don't come quite as easily as other skills. I agree with what several of you all posted about every child having a "gift". I know that my dd will have a wonderful future, but the school part of it will be challenging for her. Thanks again for the great words of wisdom.
