I think our family has finally gotten into a great routine for homeschool. The kids help me with chores, they enjoy their work, they do well, etc. The only problem is that I really, really miss my time to myself. Some days I find myself wishing they went to PS so I could have time to myself, time to keep a clean house, time to pick up some extra shifts at work, time alone with my 3mo old... We decided to homeschool so we could have more time with our kids when they are young. We want them to have strong family ties and be morally responsible. We didn't have any issues with PS, which I think sometimes makes it seem desirable to send them back. Sometimes by bedtime they are just driving me BONKERS. LOL I feel really selfish sometimes when I'm trying to decide if homeschooling is worth it. I miss my clean house, I miss the money from being able to pick up extra shifts, I miss time to myself. My children are so awesome, really they are. Well-behaved, smart, funny... <sigh> I hate the waffling and wild swings from "I love this" to "I don't like this at all". Is this normal for first-timers? When/how will it pass??
I am in my first year as well. I miss that time too, but I have instituted a "quiet time" policy. When my 3 year old goes down for a nap after lunch, both DS6 and I have quiet time. It really helps to give me some alone time, some time to finish up some projects, or just whatever. DS uses the time to read, or to play with toys that cannot be around his sister, so they have to stay in his room.
PASS ME THAT SOAP BOX!!!!! (Yep, all of you who have heard this a zillion times before are excused for a Potty Break, lol!) Let me plug Mommy Time!!! You are with your children 24/7. You NEED that "quiet time"!!! When my children were little, they took naps. When they got to the place where they didn't always NEED a nap, I would still put them down for a half-hour. If they fell asleep, fine. If not, after half an hour they were permitted to look at books in their room for another 30 minutes. Eventually when they weren't taking naps at all, they went straight to a quiet reading time in their room. I would set the timer, and they didn't come out until the timer went off. At first, I heard lots of, "Is it time yet? Was that the timer?" Once or twice, I would have to say, "I will tell you when the timer goes off. If you bother me again, I will set it a second time when it goes off...." That usually took care of that problem! Exception was when my then 6yo came running down the steps all excited because "I KNOW WHAT THOSE WORDS SAY!!!" Of course, I got all excited with her. My children are 17, 15, and 11. They STILL have a half-hour of silent reading in their rooms daily. (OK, the oldest doesn't much, because she's busy taking college classes this year, and isn't here that much during the school day!). When my sil had her children coming one day a week, they were expected to go with my children. Phillip would read one book to his cousin, and then I would expect Danny to look at books on his own for the rest of the time. My neice would go in with Rachael, and Rachael would keep her on task. (Besides, Lexi wanted to do ANYTHING her big cousin did, lol!). My sil couldn't believe her kids would actually sit and look at books for a whole half-hour!!! Now what do YOU do during this time? This is YOUR time! NO SCHOOL, NO HOUSEWORK, NO MEAL PLANNING, NO GRADING PAPERS!!! (Though I do make an exception if I'm baking bread and need to punch it down or something like that, lol!) Have a cup of tea, read a book, have a Quiet Time, visit here on the Spot. Whatever you do to relax. You REALLY need that time DAILY!!! Anything else can wait until that half-hour is over. It is NOT SELFISH to insist on just a half-hour a day for yourself!!! (OK! Potty-break is over! Jackie's getting off that soap box, lol!)
Agree with the above You need to take time for you everyday, although it may a little more difficult with the baby. When baby goes down for afternoon nap, so does everyone else (reading, coloring, etc.), but no interrupting mom's time! SO important to implement this for you. Good luck!
NORMAL!!! Completely. However, when you are older and your children are grown you will NEVER EVER wish you had had more time to yourself or a cleaner house. I can guarantee that. What you're doing now has ramifications far beyond what you can see in the day-to-day. You have to trust that. YES...try to carve out even 10 minutes to hide in your bathroom!!! LOL We do an afternoon "quiet time" meaning Mommy gets the living room all to herself and they need to be somewhere else doing something else and they are not allowed to bug me for one whole hour! LOL Sometimes i read, sometimes I sleep, sometimes I watch TV or listen to music....but it is NOT homeschool related or family related (((HUGS))) I've been doing this for 8 years, from the beginning, my kids have never been in a PS, it does get better, especially as they get more independent and older, etc.
Thanks everyone! It is nice to hear that this is something normal and not that maybe I am not cut out for this. I will work on getting a "quiet time" going this week.
I agree, completely normal. When we first brought dd home, I missed my time off. Then we brought ds home, and I missed the time alone with dd! Now, I'm glad they are both here . I do find they occupy themselves without me much better than they did when they first came home (after all, they were used to being managed 8hrs a day!). It did take time though.
I found it most hard at the beginning of this year when I had taken my DD out of preschool (she was 3 years old and had been there halfdays while I worked in the mornings but I always had an hour to myself before picking her up) Then I had the new baby (now 8 months old) and things were chaos as I had no clue how to handle two children and give each the attention they needed. Now that the baby is getting a bit bigger and more mobile I have been working on getting my eldest to have a quiet period after lunch - she is also starting to read so I give her easy books which if she chooses she can read, but mostly she just looks at the pictures. As for a clean house - I usually leave it til late afternoon and then have a quick clean up session while DD watches a movie or plays with her toys and the baby follows me around the house. I do expect my eldest to help clean up her toys, but the rest of the house needs my attention. I have learnt to get by in a less clean than normal house though - I am hoping it is a phase of the early years though
Normal! Oh yes it is. I recall missing all those wonderful free moments when I started to and there are still days I am wore right out at the end of the day. But these years are short so enjoy them as much as possible
I noticed that you work. That can make it even harder to have alone time. I work full time outside the home, so I know how it is. I would urge you to make it a priority to have some time set aside for yourself, with some flexibility built in. If interruptions can't be avoided, then try again the next day. It might take a while, but I believe it can happen. Maybe (if you are married), your husband can help. But, remember- the sacrifices we make today are probably not going to be regretted in the future. I don't know of anyone who as they grow older has wished they spent less time with their kids. Usually people regret not having spent enough time with their kids. Sadly enough, I wish I had spent more time with my son when he was younger (he is 16). We did do things together and it wasn't that, but I know we could have had more fun times. I didn't start homeschooling him until 7th grade. Just something to think about.
More times than not I feel exactly like this! I want ME time! Don't worry its completely normal! take some of the advice already given... its good!
((hugs)) Hun, we have alll been there! What helps me is looking at the bigger picture, soon they will all be grown and I will get all the Me time I want, but I will never get the kids years back..... I know I know guilt trip, I really am not trying to give one, its just what helps me get thur my bad days. So here are my tips on how to steal a few my time minutes 1. Wake up earlier or go to bed later... this is where I get most of my "me" time. 2.Educational videos are a great way to occupy lil ones without guilt 3.Find other home-school moms who will swap days with you.. for instantes 1 day a week or every 2 , etc.... you take turn watching each other kids so you can have a Me or spend time with baby day. 4. Online education is also great! I tell you our online program really help allow me time to do other things. Even if you already have a curriculum, a free program like ,learninggamesforkids.com , is always a fun add HTH
Homeschooling - It IS worth it. Hi, Homeschooling can be very demanding on your time but it really is worth it. I started homeschooling my son, Connal, when he was 10 years old. He'd been bullied at school and suffered head injuries that have left with ongoing seizures. He was also starting to develop a stubborn nature and swear because he was copying the other kids at school. The swearing stopped almost immediately that the homeschooling started, his regained his own sweet nature and our entire family became closer as a result. He's now 20 years old and studying an Honours Degree in English Language and Literature. He's still sweet-natured and very polite and we're so proud of him. So, I know homeschooling can be difficult, often isolated and very demanding of your time...but it also worth it.
