http://www.wmur.com/news/23025672/detail.html This news story is about a teen who wore an undeniably skimpy dress to prom and was given three days suspension for violating dress code. To me, that is not a story, BUT I was shocked that the administrator said that 17 of the 18 violators of dress code choose to be paddled for their punishment rather than take the suspension. These are high schoolers! I didn't know any schools spanked kids anymore, but I didn't know schools EVER spanked high schoolers.
Its a blessing really, if they chose suspension look what would happen to their grades while they were done. Probably not be able to make up work and tests, and could be very costly to them. Maybe it is a lesson learned, cover your secrets up when you go out in public !
I remember when I was in highschool - aeons ago - high schoolers were offered spanking as an alternative to suspension. The boys took it - they'd rather deal with 3 swats (which those tough guys claimed HURT) than face 2-3 days of hard work on their daddies' farms. Oh, and yes, they didn't miss and school days or schoolwork, either.
No doubt spanking would be over faster than suspension, but I can't imagine a high schooler bending over for a school official to paddle him or her. These kids are 16, 17, 18 years old. They're transitioning into adulthood; shouldn't their consequences reflex that? If they are pulled over for speeding, they're not going to be able to choose a spanking over a fine (though I think a lot of people would take that option should it be offered rather than fork over $200 --bruises heal faster than wallets). Besides, I don't think anyone but a parent should be spanking a child of any age; to me, spankings are corrections to be delivered by someone who deeply loves the child and is trying to save him or her from greater pain later. When a school official does it, it's just punititve hitting, and there is a greater possibility for misuse and abuse.
Personally, I wish schools would bring back the paddle. I remember my mom paddling her high school students when I was little. I don't remember anyone ever being suspended without first getting 3 paddles on their record for the year. Things seemed so much more civilized back then. When I started teaching, there were no consequences for anything. Even high schoolers didn't care about suspension, becuase it meant 3 days of freedom. They were longing for the day that they could drop out and get a GED instead.
My daughter is attending a charter high school part-time. I liked their notice about wearing skimpy prom dresses. They said they would be happy to provide big, bulky, ugly sweaters to any girl arriving in a dress that didn't meet the dress code. They said use your own judgement, but we have the sweaters and are itchin' to use them. LOL
My DH got paddled ALL the time in high school... sometimes multiple times in a week! He wasn't a bad student, just did crazy/obnoxious things. There was one time he had dark blue bruises across his butt for over a week... that was the last time he got paddled more than once in a week! LOL
WOW! Now let me start out by saying I'm for spanking as a disciplinary tool. It shouldn't be the only tool you use, but it can be effective for some kids, but not all. But, there comes an age where it needs to stop, and I think that depends on the individual child. But def by 13, no more spankings. It becomes more degrading and embarrassing than a useful tool. The school my son attends now (elementary) still paddles, the parent must sign for the school to be able to do it though. I remember being paddled ONCE in about 1st or 2nd grade, and let me tell you I NEVER got in trouble at school again! EVER for ANYTHING! LOL But I've never heard of a middle or high school offering paddling.
I'm more than a little disturbed by the concept of any young lady (or boy, for that matter) being forced (by threat of suspension) to bend over in front of an adult and present her bottom to them. To me it all just feels very wrong. Kind of like a bad porn movie. ("Oh Mr. Principal, I've been a bad girl. I need to be paddled!") I wouldn't allow it to be done to either of my children. But then again, we're a non-spanking family. My husband is a martial artist and one time when I kicked him he almost flattened me by reflex. So we made each other a promise - in our family no one hits anyone. When the kids came along it seemed natural to extend the protection to them.
my school had prom dress previews. Each person going to the prom had to model the dress before prom to make sure it met the code.
I'm also in the camp who is not opposed to spanking our children, however, when they became teens, we realized that taking privileges for a few days (equivalent to suspension, IMHO) had more effect than a spanking that they had forgotten all about within two hours of the incident! That being said, this particular student body & their parents had been told three times according to the report, that this would not be tolerated and what the subsequent punishment would be. It's not like she went in and had no idea. Her question, "What cleavage?" reminds me of something a former US President would try to pull! Come on!!! Perhaps they could have done something ahead of time to prevent situations such as this like the "preview" that fairfarmhand mentioned. I also think the sweater idea is a good one, too!!! At any rate, we're dealing with young "adults" and they need to be taught to take responsibility for their actions. Too many have only been taught how to pass the buck and not take responsibility. This is actually doing them a disservice when we allow this to take place. They are growing to be adults in a real world where there will be real consequences for their actions. Let's do them a favor and teach them the right way NOW!
I mentioned this story to my husband who works in the Canadian Federal Correctional Service. He said, "You can't consent to be assaulted! If you say 'hit me' and I hit you, it's still assault, and I'll be charged." I said, "Maybe it's different in Alabama?" He frowned. "Must be." I can only imagine his reaction if *anyone* ever lays a hand on one of our children, regardless of whether it's legal or not.
Wouldn't the easy way to solve this be, by not letting them into the prom? I am sure they have someone standing at the door letting people in, there could have been a clothing inspection done then. No other punishment needed.
I passed on pvt schools where you had to sign a release allowing them to use corporal(sp?) punishment. If I had to choose one of those punishments, I'd be all over that suspension! Cya! Although-I wouldn't have violated the dress code to begin with, lol.
After watching the clip, I think the dress is long enough, but it does show too much boob for a young girl. I actually like how old-time Hollywood it looks.
That's the part I didn't get. It sounds like she got to stay at the prom dressed inappropriately. A dress preview is a great idea. During my prom days, the dresses were like Scarlet O'Hara's. I don't think the school had to worry about too much skin being exposed; they just had to be concerned with the logistics of how to fit fit two hundred hooped skirts into our local civic center!
Just found this... "Deramus and seventeen others in violation stayed at Prom while their punishment waited at school." They DID get to stay. That's crazy. So, they can break the rules as long as they're willing to pay the price of a spanking or suspension later. Isn't that like buying indulgences?
The girl should have been sent home...end of story. They could have allowed her to return if she dressed more suitably. I can't see how a skimpy dress required more of a punishment than being sent home. I have no issues with spanking. However, I'm not a big fan of a school paddling. I am not 100% against it either. I do think for high school kids, it's a bit childish. Of course they will take a paddling...they probably laughed the whole time. I'm sure it's the source of jokes. If so...that is not punishment but foolishness.
