I have all younger brothers. 22, 16, and 14. My mom and I were preg. athe same time with our 14 year olds. Anyway, my brother are over at my house alot. My boys and them are very close and do a lot of things together. Other than that my boys dont have a whole lot of other friends. But I agree that they dont need a lot of socialization to know how to act. My kids make friends wherever we go. We went camping one time and my dd was playing on the play ground one min. and the next had made a friend and they were having a tea party under our awning.
I joined both Homeschool groups in my town, we do church, and I am apart of a moms support group on base. Plus the boys have joined the youth center on base and they have activities that they participate in (chess club, fit factor, to name a couple)
Jeannie is in a class everyday but Wednesday. She easily makes chit chat with the kids in her classes, but she has no real friends. The other moms are busy or in some cases don't want one more thing to do, like a playdate. I wish she had one real, good, everyday friend. I feel very sorry for her every day.
Ems socializes through her ballet classes, Sunday School, slumber parties with her friends, birthday parties, her cousins, the neighbor girl, while we clean the church, during Bible Study, when we go shopping, to the park, library, and so on. If our children are leaving the house, unless they stay in the car, they are socializing. Patty
I kind of laugh at all the goings on in homeschool. My kids are stuck at church for about 3 hours on Sunday, in the different classes and nursery. We go to the library two days a month. And that is it. I think at this point that is enough, maybe to much. Aggie
Dd is the same way Becky. Although it doesn't seem to bother her any because she is so social anyway. She's in a world of her own- literally LOL. Rhonda can vouch for that. She's more of a leader type and if nobody is following her she'll get mad at first, then she just plain doesn't care and does her own thing anyway. It does make me sad that she doesn't have ONE good friend she can see on a weekly basis though. I remember I had 2 very good friends by the time I was her age- one from school, and one was a neighborhood friend that went to a different school. I don't say anything to her though, she doesn't seemed to be bothered by it. However, because she doesn't have enough social interaction on a daily basis apart from me, she tends to get really testy with me. Can't say I blame her. She needs more than me and I think she will do so much better in school and will be happier. I'm just thankful we are moving somewhere with an awsome school system and small class sizes!
First, let me preface what we do with stressing that each child and family needs different levels of social interaction. My dd (11) and ds (10) are in a once-a-week 2 hr co-op, take piano lessons once a week, have book club and 4-H once a month, gym class twice a month, volunteer sporadically at the local national park, and participate in softball or baseball in the spring and summer. They also see their grandparents, shop with me, go to the library once or twice a week, and generally go wherever I go! Carol
Let's see....my kids play with Kim's DD. They also play with some of the neighbor kids (although most are 2-4 and mine are 9,7,& 5). They have Girl Scout meetings/activities 2-4 times a month, AWANA on Wed nights, Co-op for 2 hrs on Tuesdays, and then church on Sundays. They played soccer in the fall and took swim lessons in the spring/summer but for now, we are sport-free...until Spring soccer probably. My oldest is a "retired" competitive gymnast so we used to be busier but that was before we moved and began HSing. We got to a HS park day when its warm enough (which hasn't happened it awhile. Rhonda C.
This was a very good thread to read. Thank you. My children attend Sunday School and a Jr. church each Sunday morning. The oldest dd helps with the Jr. Church program. We attend a service on Sunday nights. Kids visit with adults and play with kids afterwards. On Tuesdays one dd takes piano lessons. All girls are taking horse riding lessons on occasion. Wednesday nights the children have kids' clubs at church. Weekly trips to the library. They each have their own library card and are responsible to check out their own books. We entertain frequently, folks of all ages. We go to other people's homes to visit. The children order their own food when we attend restuarants. I love the, "May I please have the children's spaghetti dinner with milk." The children have each other and dh and I...we are a family of 6, kids ages are 12, 8, 6, and 4.
I think I think that it's one of those things that if your kid is a social person, then they are. If not, then they won't be no matter how much social opportunity you offer them. I mean there are kids at school who are loners on the playground. Does everyone agree?
I agree about the loner thing. My oldest is more of a loner type. I hate calling him that, though, and I don't ever call him that. He does have a handful of friends, and one he considers to be his best friend. But he is not one to go chat with other kids on a playground. His brother, though, never meets a stranger! You can't get him to stop talking!
Your oldest sounds like my oldest sister. She was always quiet and would rather be alone with a book or with one or two friends at the most. She never cared for large crowds. My other sister is the social butterfly. She knows everyone and their grandma. I think this is why she is such an awesome pastor's wife. She enjoys being with people. Patty
Oh puppy snot! My kids don't socialize, remember, they are homeskoold! They didn't utter their first words until they were ummmm 12. :lol: One of my kids spent some time figuring out how many graduation announcements he will need when he graduates in May. We will need to compare prices and special order them and mail them out. Anyway, he came up with 67 names to send his graduation announcements to, which will include being invited to an open house. He chuckled and said he sure knows a lot of people for being locked away for the past 13 years! My other child didn't make out a list yet and I know that list will be longer. So, my kids are quite social and quite popular. Edited to say: I have noticed though that my kids don't really have a lot in common with kids their own ages. My kids are well spoken and very responsible. The kids their own age find it amusing to be misfits.
I talked previously about the stuff Samantha is involved in. I don't put her in things for social interaction. I sign her up for things she is interested in. For instance if she didn't like acting she wouldn't be in the class. If she didn't want to learn Spanish she wouldn't be in the class. If dance wasn't everything in the world to her she wouldn't be taking the class. I think if you are going to pay good money and put a child in activities they need to fully enjoy it and want to be there. I'm not saying anyone here does that! Just making a point. Because.... Grace doesn't want to join anything. She may when she gets older but right now she doesn't want to take dance or gymnastics or anything we've come up with. I'm not going to make her take a class just so she can "socliaze" with others. She goes to Sunday school and plays with kids on the street and if it is enough for her right now then that is fine with me.
My dh and I have made requirements on socialization or just simple involvment. We want each kid to take music lessons. No, they don't have to take lessons for years if they hate it. We just want them to have the experience. They each also have to take a sport. Again, they must finish the season but after that they don't have to go back. Kids don't always know what will interest them and sometimes you need to expose them. We will adjust to their tastes of course. My dd didn't want to take Karate at first but after taking it she LOVES it. If she hated it....she would not have to continue. However, she would have to pick something. Kids need to be involved, exposed and gain experience in a number of different areas. Now, I won't take a kid kicking and screaming. LOL. However, with the rules established that they pick one instrument and one sport...any one they want...and no obligations...they easily pick something.
The consesus So, I think that the consensus is.....monitor your child. If she is perfectly content playing with her two brothers (and she is, I have to tear her away from play sometimes to do school) and dancing three times a week, then let her be. Also, she has plenty of cousins (13 to be exact) to play with. I love the story about the little boy who was never around kids but played well. That gives me a great sense of peace. Plus, she's only 5! I think that she's got plenty of time. Thanks everyone for the great input!
Your dd sounds perfectly well adjusted and fine! Geesh, throughout the winter months, my kids mostly have each other. lol. They still do very well in all social settings. A bit quiet at times...especially my dd but I was just as shy and I went to ps. I have also observed that homeschool kids socialize much better with people of all age ranges instead of just their own. My dd and ds have experience with toddlers, adults, babies, teens, and peers. I think that helps make them more well rounded also.
Oh I wanted to clarify something. Grace is only 4 (will be 5 in a few days). So when I said she doesn't want to do anything yet it is probably her age. I will encourage her to get involved in something when she is older but I will allow her to choose what it is.
