Ok, so the boys are back home now. I talked to my BIL to see how everything went, and he said that Joseph was very well behaved and was very helpful around the house. They gave him books to read, and he read everyday (YAY). On the other hand, our 8 yr old nephew ( the one in which our son had an altercation with) was rude, disrespectful, didn't want to clean up behind himself, refused to bathe, kept snatching things from their other two boys (who are 2 and 3 years old) and kept trying to start arguments with everyone. Needless to say he went home early. BIL told me and DH that he sat down and talked to SIL about our nephew's behavior, and she said she would handle it. BIL also said it would be a long time before he would be allowed to come back to his home after he showed out, and that it may take the whole family to help rectify his problem behavior because SIL has her hands full. (She has 6 kids and 5 grandkids and she's only 38 yrs old.) He also noticed a jealous streak with our nephew and seems to think that he said those things to our son out of pure envy. SIL and I haven't spoken since the incident, but I had a long talk with my son and told him he should never, EVER put his hands on any child unless it's self-defense and that what he did was not self-defense but that he allowed his temper to get the best of him. He clearly was upset when he realized he could have put his cousin in the hospital, or worse. He loves his cousin and wants to remain close with him, but we told him that for the time being, it would probably be best if he and his sister didn't play at his aunt's house for a while. I am praying for peace in our family, patience for my children, understanding and comfort for my nephew, and for reconciliation with my SIL. Thanks to those of you who have listened to me vent! My DH and I appreciate everyone's advice and comments! May God Bless. :angel:
Wow it does sound like she has her hands full. And sadly that many little charges means she can't be everywhere all of the time. She likely said what she said to you because she was stressed and got defensive. I think giving her space and time is good. And also good if they give the other boy some attention. It must hard in a large family to maintain fairness and one on one with children. So having some empathy is good too. And yes praying for their family and yours that it smooths over soon.
It sounds like you and your family have things well in hand! It's especially awesome that your husband and BIL have stepped up to help with the boys. Your nephew will learn much faster what acceptable behaviour is, when it's reinforced by the men in his life. I feel sorry for you SIL - she must be exhausted! Thank you for the update, I was thinking about you.
Yep, prayer can work wonders! Keep at it, and I hope (and pray) that it will all smooth out and everyone can remain friends.
