I was just on FaceBook. A friend of mine's dd is going to her dad's for a week. The mom said it was hard to let her dd go! One of her other friends wrote that a couple of her other friends had kids leaving for camp or something too, then said, "If I had known kids could be gone so much I might have considered having one of my own." Then she said how my friend's responsibilities were less, so she could concentrate on other things. She ended by saying that that constituted her pep-talk. GRRRRRR! That made me feel so mad and sad, that someone could take children so lightly, and say crass things supposedly to help the mom with this lovely pep-talk! I had to say something, I just couldn't let it go! I asked if she was joking or if she was serious, then told her how much I loved my children and one reason I homeschooled was so I could be with them, since they grow up so fast! Children aren't just a responsibility or a commodity, they are a part of you, and one that is very special and dear! **These are not homeschoolers!**
Children are a gift in my book. I love my children so much I hate when they go anywhere. I know there will come a time when they hit that 82 birthday and I will have to give them up, but until then no way. I, myself have never understood how anyone can talk about children like that. Must not know much about them. Maybe we need to write a book on how special children are 101. I think some people have the nerve.
I love my kids dearly and I love having them with me 99% of the time. But I can't say I don't enjoy the quietness when they spend the night with Grandma! They also enjoy the break from me and getting spoiled by grandparents. With that said though I can't imagine being divorced and having to ship my babies off half of the time.
Many years ago, I spent the summer at a residential camp for children with special needs. Many of them were VERY high functioning to where you really didn't realize they had special needs, others were moderately high functioning. I wondered at the time why parents would send their kids away for a WHOLE SUMMER. But then, I figured the parents had to deal with their child's special problems all year 'round, and could probably use a break! And then, I learned that most of these kids attended a BOARDING SCHOOL! I am glad to "get rid" of my kids for a week of camp, and LOVE it on the rare times when they all go together. But that's for ONE WEEK, or maybe two. And Grandma use to take them all for a week. But three weeks out of the year. I wouldn't want them gone any more than that! I even told Rachael she couldn't sign up for a camp that would be FREE, because I didn't want her gone that much during the summer. I didn't have kids to dump them constantly on others!
i love my girls, but it would be nice to let them go to my mother's for a week before school starts. It would give me a little "break" before school starts! but not because i don't want the responsiblity, but just one more trip for them before school.
I hear this stuff all the time. People act like children are nothing more than burdens kind of stuff. That we should be eager to dump them off on others and be happy to see them go. I hate it. I am starting to get more guts with my responses. Stuff like "well, MY kids are great so I like having them around." When the people realize they are putting down their own children, they often back off. I think it is just so rude when people say this stuff. I completely agree with you.
Being full of sarcasm...I must say maybe, just maybe this is her sense of humor. I'm often taken wrong, so I have to give the benefit of the doubt. My son is with me 99.9% of the time and I get irritated when people make remarks like "I could never be around my kids that much" or whatever....but I have been known to make a sarcastic remark here and there....like my friend is leaving with her 2 kids and say "What's 1 more, take mine 2" I'm 100% joking...lol, he's never left with anyone besides my parents....so as I was saying....maybe, just maybe this is her sense of humor as well.
I've had plenty of moms tell me during the summer they can't wait until school starts up again because they are sick of their kids. Then I think...................How can you POSSIBLY be sick of YOUR kids when they are ALWAYS at MY house? When they make derogatory remarks about their kids I simply say, "Wow, I've never felt that way about my children". That usually shuts them up!
I think you took her too seriously, Deena. Most everybody makes jokes about getting free time from their kids, and even people without kids come up with ideas about how they'd handle things. You put them in their place, though!
This was my thought as well. I constantly make jokes like that, and people know not to take me seriously, ever. I also don't think it matters that they aren't homeschoolers. Everyone's brand of humor is different.
StoneFamily hit the nail on the head...people without children don't always get it. I remember how I thought about child rearing before I had kids. Although I was never crass about the prospect of having a child....I did have plenty of wrong ideas. I agree you should just shrug it off. Sometimes people say stupid things when they lack understanding. I once said that being pregnant was like having a terminal illness for me the first trimester...I said that in front of a woman with cancer. She didn't laugh. What a stupid thing to say.
