Please don' take this the wrong way, I LOVE my kids, but they are wimps! Any little bump, scrape, or scratch is a major deal around here. My dd12 isn't so bad, but the other three drive me crazy! I try to have sympathy for them, but sometimes I just want to tell them to "suck it up" (I don't, but I'd sure like to). For example, dd6 was in the bathtub this morning. When she got out, she was standing on the edge of the tub and fell and bumped her knee on the floor (I have a step stool right next to the tub so it shouldn't have been a problem, but that's another matter). She started screaming like she lost a limb! I went in and tried to comfort her, but the screaming just went on and on (I checked to make sure she wasn't seriously hurt, she wasn't). After several minutes of her wailing, I just told her she was fine and she needed to get back into the tub and finish her bath. She just kept crying and saying her knee hurt. I finally just told her that she had 10 minutes to be out of the tub with her hair washed, set the timer, and walked out. I know she was fine because about 6 minutes later she came out, hair washed, clothes on, no more tears. But I felt like such a mean mom to leave her in there crying. The part that bothers me most is that I can't tell when they are being dramatic and when they are seriously hurt. I'm afraid we're going to have a "boy who cried wolf" moment one of these days. Any tips on helping them "toughen up" a little?
My dd14 is exactly the same way! If she stubs her toe you'd think she broke her leg. She is a major drama queen and everything is so much worse than it actually is. Drives me insane!!! She has always been this way and will probably always be. My dd7 is the complete opposite. She can majorly hurt herself and it's nothing to her.
On the other hand, nothing seems to perturb our youngest son. On Sunday, he quietly got up off the sofa, walked to the bathroom, spent a few minutes throwing up, cleaned his teeth, and walked back to the sofa as if nothing had happened. He's always been this way about sickness and soreness. Others, on the hand, do make a mountain out of a molehill sometimes. I think it's their personalities to some extent, so we just "go with the flow" on this one and not make a big deal of it.
after my son made a "road" out of band-aids one morning in our living room (stuck them on the carpet)........ I decided to keep the band aids out of reach and not make much over small bumps and scrapes. Now to get a band aid you need to be bleading (or to keep it clean or such) ....... its cut down on a lot of over drama about little cuts and scrapes.
You can always try what I did. Explain that screaming is saved for serious instances like a limb was lost, someone is drowning etc. That when they scream we and everyone else in earshot think that is what has happened. If anything really bad were to happen and they screamed perhaps we wouldn't know or react as quickly to respond. So it is best to save screaming for emergencies and crying is ok for everything else. A few reminders and they got it. That said if it were my kids that had that happen, bumping the knee they would limp around for the rest of the day groaning lol. Its just their way of looking for more of my sympathy so I figure they must need reassuring on some level.
I don't think you should feel bad for just leaving her there to cry. You did exactly the right thing. I remember once, when my dd was tiny, she fell, cried,etc. I didn't acknowledge her except to check for damage. then I told her to dry it up, you're fine. Boy did I get an earful from a relative!! I was accused of being a mean and uncaring mom. Yeah well, I didn't want my kids to learn "emotional manipulation". There is also a benefit to learning to control one's emotions at an early age from a social standpoint. No one wants to play with a crybaby. Don't misunderstand, I encourage appropriate expression of emotion. I'm hugely emotional! But overdoing it (drama queen,anyone?) gets nipped in the bud!
I noticed when my dd (my first) was learning to walk, the stage where they fall down A LOT, that she would look around to judge the reactions of the adults around her. If anybody looked worried, she'd start to cry. If not, she got up and went on her way. I just carried through in the same vein as she grew up. She was 9 1/2 years older than ds, so we had lots of practice in "not looking worried" or overly sympathetic by the time he came around. Going "ooh aah ouch!" or "darn, that stings!" is perfectly acceptable, but we've always saved the loud screams for real injuries (of which, fortunately, we've had few). If a child falls and hits his/her head, we're quick to respond, but little bumps and bruises usually merit a "I think you'll live" with a bandaid if needed.
