CLEAN GUTTERS? oops , sorry to yell but cleaning guttes would be a messy yuckyjob, I would look for that sort of thing, Clean out the garage or attick, um... yes yard work whatever you can find...
Gutters would be up too high though, I think, though that WOULD be a good yucky job! Thanks everyone for your suggestions! Not sure when this will take place, since his sentencing isn't for awhile...
ya, true I was just thinking that about the gutters, being he is younger youth... maybe make him come and clean your toilets once a week? lol!
He could wash walls if you would like him doing inside work. If you have a garden, there are always weeds to pull. Cleaning toilets is always good! :lol:
Whatever you end up making him do should be something that you hate to do. Cleaning gutters & toilets are great. How about having him clean all the gunk behind the fridge and stove and washer and dryer (or wherever the gunk hides in your hosue). If you have baseboards have him clean those. I hate dusting my baseboards so I save that job for when dd10 gets in trouble with me. Also mowing the grass once a week or cleaning out you garage. Just some ideas.
Okay, here's something: Since he does not seem to be learning from this, and is almost enjoying the "attention" he is receiving, I'm kind of worried about our safety, and our neighbors safety! I'm also worried that if he gets mad at us for making him clean our toilets that he might take some kind of revenge on us in some form. I still want to help him and love him and try to lead him to follow Christ first instead of heading the wrong direction, but now I'm not sure about how to go about that! I'm not up for having him take out his frustrations on us any more! I don't want to head the wrong direction in my thoughts, but I DO need to consider my family in what we do and what this boy does! Did I say that he's 11? I thought he was nearing 13, but he's nearing 12. Please pray that we'll know the right thing to do!
Deena, you just brought to mind some things my sis and I went through in our childhood...she told the police on a gang of guys who had broken into our home during school day she came home to fnd them there... one boy got probation with a warning that he would go to juvi- if anything else happened.. thing is my mom had allowed this boy in our home to try to teach him how to be a good kid after he and another kid had held us hostage in our own home with bee bee guns! ( My step dad chased the boys down and made them eat the plastic bebeas that we had gathred up from our porch and deck.) This boy went on to try to drown my sister( 9 or 10 at the time) and if it were not for a dear sweet little old lady care taker at our local park who hit him over the head with her broom and held him back with it until the police got there.. who knows? So with that in mind, you may want to pray for that hedge of protection around you. I would not live in fear over it, but caution?
11 year olds aren't very good at thinking through the consequences of things, and ARE very good at conveniently forgetting the context of the disgrace and just enjoying the attention. I think you are wise to be cautious. Perhaps asking his parents to arrange for him to do some kind of community service is a better idea. We used to have kids working out their "time" at our thrift store all the time. I have to say, though, that the kids that were 12 and under had a hard time staying on task and taking the whole thing very seriously, so I'm not sure how much even that helped. The times it DID obviously make an impact on them was when the parents were involved, and were asking us every day when they picked their kid up how he did - and were following through with their own discipline if the child wasn't cooperating. Since this boy's parents are involved and interested, that is a great start! It would mean that his "punishment" is not working at your house - which means any anger or resentment over it hopefully wouldn't be directed at you either. It's something to pray about...
Teacher Mom, I couldn't believe it when I saw you had been held hostage in your own home. We had a foster daughter who was 17 several years ago. Her boyfriend came over one morning and pulled a knife on us. It was me, the foster daughter, my twins, and my cousins little girl. The twins were about 5 and the cousin was 3 or 4 at the time. We had thought he was using drugs but now we knew for sure. He was so messed up that morning. He kept telling me I had to let the twins and our foster daughter go with him to little house on the hill and didn't I hear the music playing. He kept saying wild stuff like that and somehow he mentioned something in the Bible. He said if I didn't believe it to ask our preacher. I said well he just lives right out the street, why don't I call him and ask him. He said okay you do that. So I picked up the phone and the Lord put the phone number in my mind because I hardly ever called that number. Only a day or so before my cousin had made the comment that the preacher's phone number was the year she was born and I remembered that. Now don't even try to tell me that was luck. Anyway I called and our preacher, who normally would have been visiting hospitals at that time of day, answered the phone. I said Ray I need you. He said I'm on my way. Just like that. So in about 3 minutes he walked in the door and the boy started waving that knife around and stuck it right under the preachers chin. He said this is the sword of Christ and then he held up his other hand and said this is the hand of Jesus. Ray as calm as could be said, It looks like a Case double X folding hunting knife to me. I guess that shocked the boy or something because he shut the knife and put it on the table. I kept looking at our foster daughter and then the knife because she was close to it. The boy was talking trash to the preacher and finally our foster daughter understood and reached over and got the knife and put it in her coat pocket. Before he got to our house his mother had called and said he was upset and coming to see our foster daughter. She said would we please keep him there and that his Dad was on the way to our house to get him. The boy had driven his mothers Thunderbird because he said the sign of the bird would protect him. I know it sounds crazy but it really happened! So while we are standing there in the kitchen listening to him carry on and trying to keep him calm his sister and brother in law pull in our driveway. I never did find out where the Dad went. When the boy saw them he freaked out and used language that would make a sailor blush. They left with him and I called Freddy who wasn't in law enforcement back then. He called the police and they came. The parents had him put in a mental hospital so I didn't press charges. So guess what happened to him. He was out in less than a week!!! To be honest I think our foster daughter was his biggest problem but we didn't know that until much later. The boy never bothered us again but it really was a strange day. By the way the little girls were never in the same room with him. They watched tv during the whole thing! I know this is not in line with the topic of the thread but it just popped in my head when I read your post. Beth
Wow Beth, how scary that must have been! And how God blessed you during that time! Praise the Lord for that! I pray that this boy will never bother us, or ANYONE else again too! I'm just concerned about his attitude right now. I agree Marylyn, young boys like that aren't real likely, more often than not, to take things seriously and really understand the magnitude of what they have done. So, we'll just keep praying that from here on out things happen with and to him that help lead him in God's direction!
Sorry to cut in so late , but I couldn't help but think about the boy working at your church or maybe somewhere where there is other children who have it worse than him. Maybe your pastor or youth pastor could give him odd jobs around the church and be able to witness to him/ talk to him about the direction of his life, ect... ~Melanee
That's a great idea Melanee! It's hard to work at the church, though, cuz we are only renting from another congregation. But something like that, with a strong, male mentor, a good, positive role model, would be a great idea! Thanks!
Wow! And I thought I had problems. My eldest has a girl stalking him at school. And this is a small, private "Christian" school! Just one more reason that homeschool is a better option! If this boy were my child, he would wish he had never been born. I didn't read through the entire thread (its 10 pages now), but what ARE his parents doing about his behavior?
Deena, What about working at a police station with the officer, they do it here I know when we went to the court house for a tour they told the children if you get trouble you could end up working here and it's not nice jobs. She also said the animal shelters let them work there too cleaning cage, thats not a good job.
I'm not sure what his parents are doing QG! I hope it's a wake-up call for them too, and that this helps get them all working TOGETHER in a more positive direction! Kris, those sound like good ideas! I'll have to see how the sentencing goes, and see when he could work this off! I like the idea of cleaning cages at the Humane Society! But working WITH a Plice Officer instead of AGAINST him, would be working with a positive (I would hope!) role model, which would also be good! Thanks so much for the ideas!
Let the other congregation use him then? I mean what is the difference if we are all Christians then its the same God that will reach his little soul!
Yes, TMom, but this could be a little political of a thing. I'm not sure they'd want an arsonist working with them, ya know? Maybe they would, but then if this boy did something wrong with or against them, then I have just brought a problem on them. I wouldn't want to risk our good relationship with this church, it may be crossing some boundary that we shouldn't be crossing also. I don't know, I'm not politically minded, but I prefer NOT to involve them. Does that make sense?
ya, thats true, I forgot hsi crime for a moment heh, ehe, well maybe he just needs regular community service that wont involve you then? Or make him attend church as part of his recovery from his crime, I know other htings, liek Judges have made adults get involved in loical bible studies for crimes commited.. maybe they would do that?
I don't see how a judge could get away with ordering someone to participate in anything religious in this country. The ACLU would be on that with all fours. A judge could probably get away with forcing the youth to work with SERVE or some other secular organization.
God doesn't force us to follow Him, it's our choice, and I think forced Bible study isn't going to accomplish the goal you'd want for these people, which is to turn their lives over to God of a free will, and choose Him because they want the relationship! I think being around positive role models IS important, and as I said earlier, I'd love to be able to invite him to church sometime. But I think my ultimate goal with him would be for him to know that God loves him and wants a relationship with him! But being forced into it wouldn't lead to a true repentance!
