Dugger family having another one~

Very well said IMHO and I agree! I'm happy for them too.

I can't speak for whether or not the older children feel burdened by sharing in the care of their siblings. I'm sure some children in large families feel pressure while others in a similar situation may not.

From what I see on television (and I fully acknowledge things *could* be different once the cameras are off), the Duggar children seem to have relationships that strengthen their family ties, create a true sense of family, responsibility, and loyalty, and foster an attitude of others first.

Their choice is not one our family has made, but I'm happy to see a loving Christian family who seems to be passionate about family.

Just my 2 cents.

 

I can speak for older children having to raise younger siblings. My mom was a single parent, by the time it was just me and my sister (who is 8 years younger than me) at home my mom was working nights. It was my responsibilty from the time I was 13 to get my sister at her school after I got home from mine, take her home, help her with her homework, cook her dinner, take her to activities that she had, give her her bath and get her in bed. I was not allowed to do any activities because of this, I missed every school dance, birthday party, sleepover, etc. Maybe that is why I moved out at 17 (my junior year of high school) and struggled to survive on my own and finish highschool all the while trying to keep from getting killed by an abusive boyfriend.

 

If the kids are having kids of their own they must not mind the responsibility, eh? 19 is a lot, but if you can handle it and enjoy it why not? Sometimes I wish for a big family, but having 2 can be a challenge for me sometimes!

 

well yes back in the 1800's or whatever they had alot of children but they had children then because they need them to work the farms. those days are gone.
I was from a very big family too 12 of us and man I was like crazymama, never got to do anything didn't have the money or time, had kids to raise.
Also, I always said and will say the truth will come out one day they are not the perfect, sweet loving parents they seem to be.
I still say they are doing it because like rhi said they love making babies.
It's got to be hard on the older ones. Never be able to do anything with out a baby on the hip.
I know and I believe its great for children to learn but not 24/7 so mom and dad can be in the bedroom doing there thing.
If they want to make them they need to take care of them. Thats what all they always tell the teens that get pg, if you want to lay down and make them now you have to take care of them. Why are they any different? In books there is no different.
All the tv shows are what keeping them going and making the money to keep the family running.
To me it's sad really sad.

 

I say if you can handle it and your children don't mind than have a many as you want. But how can you support all of them, mind you the Duggers are debt free! yes, the tv show helps them support their family, but If they did not have the show, they still would have so many children. I think they love each one of them.

 

Oh Shelby, I am not saying and don't think anyone is saying they don't love the children.
how could you not they are all a blessing.
Yes, they are debt free thanks to the tv programs and things they do.
Also, the older children have no choice I am sure, my parents never ask us.
So, I am sure they never ask the older ones either. If they did I would bet they wouldn't have number 19.

 

I think it's just different. From what I understand - they were debt free before the huge TV show - I remember seeing something ages ago about them building the house and they were debt free then.

The family I know with 12 seems to share responsibility but at the same time the kids have their own interests and seem to have there own time. We have the girls over here sometimes during our farm tour days and things like that. They did homeschool until a certain age then some of the boys go to an exclusive private school and the mom does a ton of driving!! She'd have more too if she was blessed to have them.

 

Hey, I think it's great!!!! What a lucky baby to have so many to love her or him!

 

They didn't build that house until after they had done several television specials. I'm pretty sure those shows paid for that house to be built. Yes, I do think it's awesome that they are debt free, we are close.. we have my truck to pay off yet, which will happen next year. It feels good to not have debt hanging over our heads, but it certainly doesn't make us perfect.

 

Yeah - I mean that house is amazing - but I think they started it before and I don't think it was ever going to be THAT big.

 

Looking back I wish that I had a whole lot more kids. I'm not sure if I would want 19 but definately more than two. I know of families like theirs and everyone seems very happy. I'm happy for them. I just hope that they know when to stop. It would be tragic if something were to happen to mom in childbirth, she's not getting any younger.

 

Lee you bring up a point I have always thought of - it can not be good for her body to have 19 kids! I'm not sure what they are thinking. Of course a baby in a loving family is a good thing but children raising children simply because there are too many children for the parents to handle alone is not a good thing. And the health issue is just too much to ignore.

 

Lee, I have thought about that too. Esp after this last baby I had, I started hemmoraging after him. Luckily they caught it fast and some meds stopped it, but really it could have been very very bad.

When I was in nursing school I was taking an internship at an ER. We had a lady come in who had a prolapsed uterus. The dr said it was because it had been stretched out too many times from too many babies (she had 5!) and it lost it's abilty to "control itself" and fell out through her cervix! I think about that a lot too... I have had 4 babies... could that happen to me?

 

I wanted tons of children too, but I knew I couldn't raise them without help and I would not do that to my children. I had to when I grew up and missed out on alot.
But, that is my opinion...

 

I just think its crazy, but thats just me.

 

Is it really a big deal HOW they made their money? Really, it's not like doing the television show is unethical or immoral. It's their job, so who cares if the show got them a lot of money. Obviously it is God's way of taking care of their financial needs.

Even though some people have come from a large family background doesn't mean that the Duggar household is anything like that. It's comparing apples to oranges. It's like some of you saying how aweful your public school experience was and assuming everyone else has the same experiences. I type this as my son is sitting in his public school classroom...GASP!

It's refreshing to see a family with Christian morals and values on television! A lot of people can't even raise 1 child right, let alone 19 or more. Obviously God has a plan for this family, or else they wouldn't be the happy and healthy family that they are. How do I know they are healthy and happy??? I know someone who happens to know the family! They are as put-together in person as they are on tv. I think a lot of people just wish they could raise their own children with half the decency and morals as the Duggar's have raised their children with. I'm not saying anyone here, just a general statement because I've noticed a lot of naysayers just want to cast a stone and then complain when a stone is cast at them for something!

I am happy for them and wish them all the best. On a side note...in smaller families when a mom has a child close to the age of one of their grandbabies, nobody ever makes a gasp. Sure they think it's odd, but nobody thinks it's a big deal otherwise. Why this one? Because they have 18 already? SUCH a double standard, IMO. They're not living off the government, they are kind decent folks with morals and ethics, and their children are bright! I wish there were more people like them and I would love to meet them some day! Obviously having this many children IS for them and they feel God has called them to this place, or else I don't think they would be able to make it work so well. Some people choose to have lots of children who can't pull it off...they are answering God's call and obviously know how to do it well! So the kids help with their siblings. Heaven forbid they learn about teamwork, structure, chores, responsibility, and the real world (yes I'm being sarcastic). ;-P

Congrats Michelle, Jim Bob, and siblings!

 

I'm sure they do love their children and see them as blessings but how can they effectively parent and have one on one time with each child? And they do have a beautiful big house and they are blessed to be debt free, who wouldn't be feel blessed to be that way. But at the same time they are profiting off of their 18 now 19 children to keep debt free. With businesses going out of business and people loosing their jobs I doubt their rental properties are all occupied.

And as an older child taking care of younger ones you do miss out on hanging out with friends, or going places with them and if they were in traditional school proms, dances and football games. Those are memories they don't get the chance to experience to often or at all because they are all tied up taking care of their younger siblings. And why can't they voice how they would like to dress or have their hair?

 

THANK YOU, JEN!!! Ditto what you said!!!

 

Your post is filled with a lot of "assumptions", IMO. First, they had a lot of kids before their show. They were always debt free before the show. If the show ended tomorrow, I'm sure they have enough money in the bank to live off of. It doesn't take much once you've reached a few million and can live off of the interest. I don't think they "need" the show to stay debt free. They do the show because they feel they should continue to be good role models for tv. With all the filth out there, thank GOD there is one family who glorifies God!

Second, one on one time. How is it any different than sending a child to school ALL day (7 hours a day)? I barely get 10 minutes of one on one time each day with my oldest because I work at night and stay home with our youngest while he is in school during the day. So, am I going to get blasted because I am a working mother? It's really not much different. They are a family 24/7, and if you watch the show, they do PLENTY of very fun things. Going skydiving beats the prom any day for me! :lol:

And speaking of prom...many homeschoolers don't get a prom or anything of the like. So, why should they feel any more burdened than other smaller homeschooled family? The kids get PLENTY of time away to do fun stuff without having to take care of younger ones. I'm sure Michelle doesn't just dump her younger kids off 24/7. People need to stop assuming the worst and taking it to the extreme just because they have a large family.

Lastly, you do not know for fact that they don't get to have their hair the way they want to. I'm sure their parents instill in them to appreciate what they have...clothes and all. My children don't get to have their hair and clothes the way they want all the time either. My yougest gets mostly hand me downs....just like the Duggars, and I only have 2 children! That's why I'm their mother!

 

You know, if Michelle was with us right now, I bet she'd be very busy passing around LOTS of bean dip! It would probably take her whole clan to make enough!